Hello
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Brisbane
Posts: 2
Hello
Hi I'm a newcomer,
I don't know what else to say right now except I'm trying to get all the help I can to give up drinking as it is really becoming (or is) a big problem in my life.
Thanks.
I don't know what else to say right now except I'm trying to get all the help I can to give up drinking as it is really becoming (or is) a big problem in my life.
Thanks.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Brisbane
Posts: 2
Thanks, well actually I say I'm a newcomer but really I'm not. I have tried to give up drinking many times. I've tried AA maybe 3 times. Last week I went to a meeting. I'm a very outgoing person and a functioning alcoholic (although if I carry on I will be a non-functioning alcoholic). But, when I went to the meeting I felt totally anxious and couldn't say a thing. I looked around and thought all these people are so much better than me - they have willpower. I was asked to speak but I couldn't (really out of character for me). A guy asked me if I was a newcomer and I said "sort of" because I felt like a fraud. A few years ago in a different AA meeting a woman actually gave up quite a lot of time for me, she became my sponsor. I even took on the book keeper role (or something), but then I started having doubts. I felt a bit cross that I was never able to discuss literature outside of AA literature (now I just think I don't care if I can't discuss it as long as I can get sober). One evening I said that I wasn't staying, that it all wasn't right for me. They just sort of looked at me. One old guy gave me a smile and said good luck. I walked out and haven't been back since. Now I feel if I do go back to that particular group they won't want me there. After walking out I stayed sober for about 6 months. There are other groups in my area (I'm fortunate to live in a city where there are many groups), but I'm worried about running into someone that (may be I hurt) from the past meeting, or maybe they'll think the trouble maker is back. Anyway, I have decided to keep going to AA meetings and to make it work this time around, and if I bump into someone just hope they won't think bad of me.
Thanks for listening.
Thanks for listening.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Toronto, ON
Posts: 215
Originally Posted by encore 
Thanks, well actually I say I'm a newcomer but really I'm not. I have tried to give up drinking many times. I've tried AA maybe 3 times. Last week I went to a meeting. I'm a very outgoing person and a functioning alcoholic (although if I carry on I will be a non-functioning alcoholic). But, when I went to the meeting I felt totally anxious and couldn't say a thing. I looked around and thought all these people are so much better than me - they have willpower. I was asked to speak but I couldn't (really out of character for me). A guy asked me if I was a newcomer and I said "sort of" because I felt like a fraud. A few years ago in a different AA meeting a woman actually gave up quite a lot of time for me, she became my sponsor. I even took on the book keeper role (or something), but then I started having doubts. I felt a bit cross that I was never able to discuss literature outside of AA literature (now I just think I don't care if I can't discuss it as long as I can get sober). One evening I said that I wasn't staying, that it all wasn't right for me. They just sort of looked at me. One old guy gave me a smile and said good luck. I walked out and haven't been back since. Now I feel if I do go back to that particular group they won't want me there. After walking out I stayed sober for about 6 months. There are other groups in my area (I'm fortunate to live in a city where there are many groups), but I'm worried about running into someone that (may be I hurt) from the past meeting, or maybe they'll think the trouble maker is back. Anyway, I have decided to keep going to AA meetings and to make it work this time around, and if I bump into someone just hope they won't think bad of me.
Thanks for listening.
Thanks for listening.
It's good you keep trying, and keeping up with supports. There are probably other types of meetings out there if you really aren't happy with AA. AA isn't for me either, but I think going to be meetings might be helpful.
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