Biggest cause of slips & relapses?
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Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 5,250
Originally Posted by miamifella 
If we understood this, it would be so much easier to avoid relapse.
I started this thread so I could build up my tool box for "relapse prevention".
Obviously the people WHO don't relapse are doing something different than those who do. What is it?
Thx!
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Join Date: Jun 2015
Posts: 444
Hungry/angry/lonely/tired coupled with strong rationalization that drinking would be good medicine just that one time.
I constantly check in with myself to make sure I'm keeping myself fortified with life nourishing habits realizing that this fight can be lost without vigilance.
Doing these things now for a number of months to the point that they are habitual and the urge to relapse continues to diminish in strength.
Stay vigilant.
Jonathan
I constantly check in with myself to make sure I'm keeping myself fortified with life nourishing habits realizing that this fight can be lost without vigilance.
Doing these things now for a number of months to the point that they are habitual and the urge to relapse continues to diminish in strength.
Stay vigilant.
Jonathan
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Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Pacific Northwest
Posts: 645
I have a few years under my belt and I believe it is not having a recovery plan in place especially when the witching hour comes usually on Friday night after a hard weeks work. That and you finally have to want to truly be sober more than you want to drink.
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
Lack of education is #1.
I did not know what i was doing to myself w all the binging...
That is why I constantly tell new folks about the brain damage....
They do not get that part, like I didn't, initially.
Thanks.
I did not know what i was doing to myself w all the binging...
That is why I constantly tell new folks about the brain damage....
They do not get that part, like I didn't, initially.
Thanks.
I could see peace instead of this
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Canada, eh
Posts: 2,360
The main cause for my relapse was first entertaining the idea that I could control my drinking again and then believing the lie. The way I stay sober is, as already mentioned, by watching my thoughts. I pay attention to my thinking as well as make sure that I am in good spiritual condition. I first learned those things through the AA program, and have added other teachings along the way.
Formerly ScrewdUpInDe
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: In the Nightmare in my head
Posts: 5,329
Why did you drink before ... stress, anxiety, boredom etc?
Each person is different. The more tools you have for dealing with things the better. You should try to have more than one tool for things. One tool that works for one stressful situation may not work for a different stressful situation. It's a learning process, to recognize situations before you get overwhelmed.
Each person is different. The more tools you have for dealing with things the better. You should try to have more than one tool for things. One tool that works for one stressful situation may not work for a different stressful situation. It's a learning process, to recognize situations before you get overwhelmed.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,355
I think complacency is a big factor. To stay sober I really had to remember how relentless my desire to drink again could be.
I have to remember that any thought I have that a drink is a good idea is a wrong one.
I think a lot of people underestimate the task too. Staying sober can be hard, especially in the beginning.
Some people fall into the trap of thinking it will always be as hard as it is in the beginning and they drink again because they get scared of that.
Some people are unwilling to change their life sufficiently. I had to change my life completely because my old one was all about me drinking.
Some people are unwilling to ask for help too. They feel it's weak and that they 'should be able' to not drink, on their own without assistance. Sometimes they'll find the support, but not use it when they need it.
Some people are in denial as to the seriousness of their problem.
They think a month or two of enforced abstinence will have changed them or turned them into a normal drinker.
Some folks simply don't want to stop drinking. The want to drink as much as they want to and not have any negative consequences.
Some people think all they need to do is to try and not drink.
It's like running into a burning building with your eyes shut and hoping not to get burned.
A plan is fundamental
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
I've said 'some people' here but, in reality, I've been guilty of all of these and probably more.
Others may have more ideas to share Kiki
D
I have to remember that any thought I have that a drink is a good idea is a wrong one.
I think a lot of people underestimate the task too. Staying sober can be hard, especially in the beginning.
Some people fall into the trap of thinking it will always be as hard as it is in the beginning and they drink again because they get scared of that.
Some people are unwilling to change their life sufficiently. I had to change my life completely because my old one was all about me drinking.
Some people are unwilling to ask for help too. They feel it's weak and that they 'should be able' to not drink, on their own without assistance. Sometimes they'll find the support, but not use it when they need it.
Some people are in denial as to the seriousness of their problem.
They think a month or two of enforced abstinence will have changed them or turned them into a normal drinker.
Some folks simply don't want to stop drinking. The want to drink as much as they want to and not have any negative consequences.
Some people think all they need to do is to try and not drink.
It's like running into a burning building with your eyes shut and hoping not to get burned.
A plan is fundamental
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
I've said 'some people' here but, in reality, I've been guilty of all of these and probably more.
Others may have more ideas to share Kiki
D
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Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 5,250
Originally Posted by Zufrieden
Hungry/angry/lonely/tired coupled with strong rationalization that drinking would be good medicine just that one time. I constantly check in with myself to make sure I'm keeping myself fortified with life nourishing habits realizing that this fight can be lost without vigilance. Doing these things now for a number of months to the point that they are habitual and the urge to relapse continues to diminish in strength. Stay vigilant. Jonathan
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Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 5,250
Originally Posted by NoelleR
I won't be very popular here, but what the heck. I was always told that there are no causes for slips and/or relapses, only excuses. (o:
The whole point of me starting this thread is to continue to stay sober & to NOT do what the people who are chronic relapsers are doing.
If you didn't like my post you could have just ignored it. ;-)
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Failing to have a plan or failing to follow it daily would be my response. Almost every time I started drinking again it was because I thought I was somehow "better" and didn't need to do the work anymore.
Formerly ScrewdUpInDe
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: In the Nightmare in my head
Posts: 5,329
Originally Posted by Dee74
Some people are unwilling to ask for help too. They feel it's weak and that they 'should be able' to not drink, on their own without assistance. Sometimes they'll find the support, but not use it when they need it.
A plan is fundamental
Others may have more ideas to share Kiki
D
A plan is fundamental
Others may have more ideas to share Kiki
D
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Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 5,250
Originally Posted by Wastinglife
For me it is anxiety. I caused a lot of damage to my life so I fear it is already ruined forever. these thoughts race through my mind and alcohol seems to be the only thing that calms me.
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Join Date: Nov 2015
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Originally Posted by Dee74
I think complacency is a big factor. To stay sober I really had to remember how relentless my desire to drink again could be. I have to remember that any thought I have that a drink is a good idea is a wrong one. I think a lot of people underestimate the task too. Staying sober can be hard, especially in the beginning. Some people fall into the trap of thinking it will always be as hard as it is in the beginning and they drink again because they get scared of that. Some people are unwilling to change their life sufficiently. I had to change my life completely because my old one was all about me drinking. Some people are unwilling to ask for help too. They feel it's weak and that they 'should be able' to not drink, on their own without assistance. Sometimes they'll find the support, but not use it when they need it. Some people are in denial as to the seriousness of their problem. They think a month or two of enforced abstinence will have changed them or turned them into a normal drinker. Some folks simply don't want to stop drinking. The want to drink as much as they want to and not have any negative consequences. Some people think all they need to do is to try and not drink. It's like running into a burning building with your eyes shut and hoping not to get burned. A plan is fundamental http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html I've said 'some people' here but, in reality, I've been guilty of all of these and probably more. Others may have more ideas to share Kiki D
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html I've said 'some people' here but, in reality, I've been guilty of all of these and probably more. Others may have more ideas to share Kiki DFormerly ScrewdUpInDe
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: In the Nightmare in my head
Posts: 5,329
Originally Posted by Dee74
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