Dim

Hi guys,
Back again. Thought i had beaten it once and for all and yet i find myself on these forums after 5 months on the preverbial wagon. Since my last binge i've managed to be able to have a drink here and there and nothings come of it and now out of the blue and a nice argument with the Mrs i found myself at the tail end of a 2 day binge. Work knows, and i'm holding on by a thread to my job and my girl has asked for some time (says shes not going to leave me) and now i feel absolutely horrible. Zero energy, a decent amount of anxiety and nothinh to do for the next few days but twiddle my thumbs. I wish i had the energy to do something productive today but dont really have anything to keep myself busy with. Doesnt help eithee that the weather is beautiful and i find myself unable to do anything to enjoy the day.

Anna

Unfortunately, we don't beat alcoholism by stopping drinking for several months and then believing we can be cured and can moderate. But we can recover from alcoholism and live a great life as long as we understand we can never drink again.

I'm glad you're back and I hope that you start to feel better soon.

Hevyn

Hi Dim - I'm sorry you're going through this, but really glad you wanted to talk about it.

I went on for years insisting I could have a few now and then. Very bad things continued to happen - and I found myself completely dependent on it. The only way to stay away from danger & misery was to stop all together. Each time it was in my system it led to unexpected chaos. It sounds like you learned something valuable, Dim. We're glad you're here.

Thumpalumpacus

Indeed, moderation doesn't work for me. Get back on the bike and start pumping those pedals, you can do this.

maverickspoint

Sorry to hear about the set back man. The big challenge right now is knocking it on the head again pronto. I expect the alcoholic in you is saying "Sweet, we have a little holiday to look forward to, no girl around, can stay off work, suns out, let's get wasted" At least that's what mine would be saying. Screw it and get back on the wagon, if you do, give it 2 days and you'll feel strong again, you'll have way more respect for yourself if you know you knocked it down right away rather than let it take control of you up for any length of time. I won't say good luck because it's not about that, just be strong.

CaseyW

I also am newly back here after deciding I could drink again at the five month sobriety mark, so I can very much identify with your story.

Sounds like you have a lot to lose if you continue drinking, glad you've found us again. I'd spend that downtime working on a recovery plan. This is a better way of life.

least

Glad you're back, trying again.

2muchpain

Nice going on five months. That's quite an achievement. I'm coming up on five months myself and the idea of picking up a six-pack still crosses my mind sometimes especially, like you, when I have time on my hands. I've been off work this week so it would be easy to drink, But I've been down this road many times before so I know where it ALWAYS LEADS. I know many people have said this before, but think about where you'll be in a few days if you continue to drink. Your job and girlfriend are great motivators, but do you want to go through all the work it takes to get sober again? I know I don't, and I'm sure you don't want to either. Take care. John

Dim

Thabks so much for the replies. I can always count on this forum when things are grim. Can anyone lend any advice as to when i'll start feeling better? I've got very little energy snd sleep is a bit of a struggle. When will i start to feel a little more normal? Thanks in advance

2muchpain

How soon someone begins to feel better seems to vary a lot, but, in my experience, the longer I drank the tougher it was when I quit. There have been times when I started drinking again, the one thing that helped me stop was knowing how much worse it was going to be if I kept drinking. I still had problems when I quit, but nothing as bad as could of been if I kept drinking. That's been my experience. John

PurpleKnight

Welcome back Dim!!

Ruby2

Hi Dim, welcome back.

You asked for advice as to when you'll feel better. That varies. I do have advice. Take drinking off the table completely. I had to relearn my responses to stress. "now out of the blue and a nice argument with the Mrs i found myself at the tail end of a 2 day binge" What I found is that none of my drinking was "out of the blue." Part of successful sobriety is anticipating that arguments and disappointments will happen. How will I deal with that when it comes up and not turn to drinking to feel better?

Coming on here and posting is one of those ways. Bump up your participation here. Come on every day, whether you feel like it or not. Read what other people have to say. Answer questions. Ask questions. Keep going. But no drinking.

Soberwolf

Good to see you

Vandermast

hey dim

I can empathise quite strongly with your post......

ive picked up a drink after a fair period of sobriety.....managed to moderate fpr a bit and then.........the binge and 3 lost days, a big mess and a head full of sorrow.....

seems that if you are alcoholic then this is what happens......

I don't think ill ever moderate....so ive given up trying to moderate....

ive given up drinking completely and am doing everything possible to maintain that premise, from which hopefully a new life can flourish.....

you are amongst friends here.

van

SoberinSyracuse

I agree with the above. Drinking has to be dismissed entirely and forever. Once that's etched in stone in your brain, those stress triggers will have to find another outlet.

Sorry about the setback but you're wiser for it now and better positioned for a WIN.

Plure

Welcome back Dim. I also fell off the wagon with almost a year's worth of sobriety. Thought moderation was the route for me which unfortunately it was not. I know the withdrawal sensations you describe (esp. anxiety), but they do pass. Just make sure you get plenty of rest and stay hydrated. In fact, rather than being bummed that you don't want to do anything, tell yourself your mind is tired and needs the rest, at least for a few days to a week. We live in such a go go go world that you have to stop and give yourself permission to be lazy for a bit.

Hang in there!

Hevyn

How's it going today, Dim? Thinking of you.

Dee74

How are you doing now Dim?

D

FreeOwl

Boy... If I was in Melbourne with nothin' to do I'd drive or hitch or hell... walk down the coast to Torqay and Bells and surf my head off.



I miss Melbourne... what a great city. Fantastic food. Get out to St. Kilda and go to claypots and eat the best fish in the world!!

But here... what I really came into your thread to tell you was this;

I also relapsed after 5 months of sobriety. My fall back into the booze wound me up going deeper and deeper and deeper into it for most of a year and a half until I got to the point I was blacked out more days than not.

The good news though is that now I'm over 2 years sober and life is far better than I ever could have dreamed while drinking... and I see it getting better every day.

I hope you won't let this turn into your long, downward spiral. I did a fair lot of boozing it up in Melbourne. I know how hard it can be with the hard-drinking culture. But you know what - it's also a gorgeous city with a lot of awesome things to do and experience without drinking. And within a couple hours drive lay some of the greatest experiences on the planet. You don't need booze, mayte.... you've got OZ!!!!

Dust off your britches, get back up and choose sobriety my friend. It will blow your freaking mind.

You can do it.