Have you ever thought about starting your own group?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Florida
Posts: 6,780
Have you ever thought about starting your own group?
I don't mean Al-Anon specifically, just to be clear.
I'm going to a meeting on Friday night that isn't a regularly-scheduled event. It's basically just a bunch of us getting together at our reiki center, to discuss our life challenges & observations & share tools that have worked for us. I find that while the discussion is not recovery-centric, I still share a lot of the tools & language from what I've learned in my Codie journey toward healing. Conversely, the non-recovery-specific stuff that others share often impacts my Codie journey in a really positive way.
I'm considering asking the group if they'd be interested in getting together more regularly, with the focus on healing/recovering as a Whole Person... which is what made me start wondering exactly what others rave or rant about re: their group experiences.
I've been hemming & hawing over joining a group for a long time, personally. My county has quite a few meetings but they almost all take place during my working hours or during DD's extracurricular activities. I can't even make a lunch time meeting because traffic in our area is horrendous - IF I made it to the meeting on time, I'd have to turn around & drive right back to the office to be avoid being late. It's frustrating - once I eliminate the men's, early morning, midday meetings & those that are step-specific or more than an hour away from home, I have few options. I don't mind sacrifice, but since I'm not living in a crisis situation & time is one of my most precious assets, my ideal "group" would expand beyond addiction at this point in my life.
I fill the need with all kinds of events - meditation classes, one-day lectures, etc. but it would be nice to have a gathering that I could count on, even just monthly.
I'm going to a meeting on Friday night that isn't a regularly-scheduled event. It's basically just a bunch of us getting together at our reiki center, to discuss our life challenges & observations & share tools that have worked for us. I find that while the discussion is not recovery-centric, I still share a lot of the tools & language from what I've learned in my Codie journey toward healing. Conversely, the non-recovery-specific stuff that others share often impacts my Codie journey in a really positive way.
I'm considering asking the group if they'd be interested in getting together more regularly, with the focus on healing/recovering as a Whole Person... which is what made me start wondering exactly what others rave or rant about re: their group experiences.
I've been hemming & hawing over joining a group for a long time, personally. My county has quite a few meetings but they almost all take place during my working hours or during DD's extracurricular activities. I can't even make a lunch time meeting because traffic in our area is horrendous - IF I made it to the meeting on time, I'd have to turn around & drive right back to the office to be avoid being late. It's frustrating - once I eliminate the men's, early morning, midday meetings & those that are step-specific or more than an hour away from home, I have few options. I don't mind sacrifice, but since I'm not living in a crisis situation & time is one of my most precious assets, my ideal "group" would expand beyond addiction at this point in my life.
I fill the need with all kinds of events - meditation classes, one-day lectures, etc. but it would be nice to have a gathering that I could count on, even just monthly.
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Starting over all over again
Posts: 4,426
I've started lots of meetings. Al-anon, ACA, ISA, AA-Alanon Couples, etc. What works best for me is to have them as a once a month potluck at my place, followed by the meeting. I get half a dozen people to agree on a day of the week and time, then call them on the phone to remind them one week before the actual meet.
After 6 months the meet either grows on it's own and into a regular church or similar space, or it wasn't a good time to do it. The yearly calendar also makes a diff. Right during "recruiting season" is best of al-anon meets ( Thanksgiving thru New Years), summer is bad for all meets, late fall into winter is best for ACoA meets ( dreading the holidays ).
Mike
After 6 months the meet either grows on it's own and into a regular church or similar space, or it wasn't a good time to do it. The yearly calendar also makes a diff. Right during "recruiting season" is best of al-anon meets ( Thanksgiving thru New Years), summer is bad for all meets, late fall into winter is best for ACoA meets ( dreading the holidays ).
Mike
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Starting over all over again
Posts: 4,426
Originally Posted by Forourgirls 
I would love to do this....but don't know where to start!!!
"Starting an Al-Anon Group (G-12)"
http://www.al-anon.org/members/pdf/guidelines/G12.pdf
can get you started. Once you register your new al-anon meeting world services will send you a fat 3-ring binder with all kinds of material to get you up and running.
Mike
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Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Texas
Posts: 2,872
^ yes-if you could get to a Divorce Care class that would be great!! I seriously am looking into this....I sent away for Alanon literature! I feel too overwhelmed as well but truly would like to do something. Hopeful, maybe you and I could do some sort of web based online group?! Invite only?!
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Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: W Washington
Posts: 11,589
regarding 12 step meetings - as my ex Mike used to say...all you need to start a meeting is a resentment and a coffee pot.
seriously tho, if you are considering starting a meeting with an establish group, you need to contact the World Service Office of that group for the How To's......
seriously tho, if you are considering starting a meeting with an establish group, you need to contact the World Service Office of that group for the How To's......
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Florida
Posts: 6,780
Thanks for the input guys!
I'm not talking about a 12-step group specifically, or ANY group that already exists, for that matter, lol. I'm talking about something new, something like a recovery-melting-pot.
The Center where I attend a lot of events is kind of like that already. I call it the place where Jesus & Buddha meet to read each other's tarot cards.
I've met people from all faiths, people with all kinds of diverse backgrounds, from all over the world. Everyone identifies with being at least a little broken & while we may have many different reasons for that brokenness, on a core level so much rings true across those differences. The "fixes" can be somewhat universal.
Although ~ I truly believe that more people are affected by addiction & toxic codependency than they even realize.... it so often seems like the seeds of toxic behavior are planted many generations back & breaking the cycle means being the first person in an entire bloodline to step out of the cycle & choose a better way. The more I talk openly about my history, the more & more I am hearing "me too" from others. Alcoholism has come up twice this week at work ALONE, in completely different ways, with 2 completely different clients.
For me, recovery has been so much more than "just" the components that ANY program can give because none of them wrap fully & completely around ALL parts of me. My recovery is made up of pieces of everything that I've learned & collected from more sources than I can name, relating to body, mind & spirit. It's about My Whole Life, not just addiction or codependency. I'm talking about a group where the members are bringing THAT kind of stuff to the table to be shared.
Since the Center kind of allows us to do that anyway, it made me think that just maybe many of my classmates or fellow attendees would find value in something like this - like informal discussion groups. (But yes, Mike, I agree, the group would need to sustain itself on some level - I'm not looking to lead anything.)
I'm not talking about a 12-step group specifically, or ANY group that already exists, for that matter, lol. I'm talking about something new, something like a recovery-melting-pot.
The Center where I attend a lot of events is kind of like that already. I call it the place where Jesus & Buddha meet to read each other's tarot cards.
I've met people from all faiths, people with all kinds of diverse backgrounds, from all over the world. Everyone identifies with being at least a little broken & while we may have many different reasons for that brokenness, on a core level so much rings true across those differences. The "fixes" can be somewhat universal.Although ~ I truly believe that more people are affected by addiction & toxic codependency than they even realize.... it so often seems like the seeds of toxic behavior are planted many generations back & breaking the cycle means being the first person in an entire bloodline to step out of the cycle & choose a better way. The more I talk openly about my history, the more & more I am hearing "me too" from others. Alcoholism has come up twice this week at work ALONE, in completely different ways, with 2 completely different clients.
For me, recovery has been so much more than "just" the components that ANY program can give because none of them wrap fully & completely around ALL parts of me. My recovery is made up of pieces of everything that I've learned & collected from more sources than I can name, relating to body, mind & spirit. It's about My Whole Life, not just addiction or codependency. I'm talking about a group where the members are bringing THAT kind of stuff to the table to be shared.
Since the Center kind of allows us to do that anyway, it made me think that just maybe many of my classmates or fellow attendees would find value in something like this - like informal discussion groups. (But yes, Mike, I agree, the group would need to sustain itself on some level - I'm not looking to lead anything.)
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