Around and About

Old 03-01-2016, 10:13 AM
  # 1 (permalink)  
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Location: NY, NY
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Around and About

So today I am feeling a little blue.

I love my new job, and they love me. So that's good.
I have cut ties with the majority of the staff at the old place. That's good too.
I have started a new class and am loving it.
I have started auditioning again and knocking it out of the park.
I have started eating again.

AND THEN....
And then a photo surfaced of my AXBF FOUR BLOCKS FROM MY HOUSE AND AT MY SUBWAY STOP. Like, I walk by there every single day. He has no reason to be over here; by subway, it would take him about 45 minutes to get here from his house.

What in the ever loving hell? There are enough restaurants and neighborhoods in NYC that he needs never to be over here. There are enough restaurants in this immediate area that he needs never be anywhere near me. Yes he knew where he was (sometimes that happens in NYC). He lived here for two months.

I tried to make a billion excuses....

His rehab is over here (yeah, but not really. It's about a 20 minute walk from my house. And he's begging his adderall--which he needs--off one of the bartenders at my old place instead of going back to rehab to see his therapist)
He thinks I work on Sundays...(well, he would have no way of knowing because we don't work together anymore, and my schedule changes every week)
And God...I don't know what else. But it unsettled me.

This is also on the heels of his "whatever" after me (the super promiscuous hostess) being committed to a psych ward for mental instability and substance abuse.

I feel like any rational adult would choose, especially because we are not in communication, and he basically ran me out of my job, to just avoid my area (it's been about 2.5 weeks since I left my old job). And maybe that's the key...he's not rational.

Can anyone shed some light. Offer some thoughts?
I feel...weird.
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Old 03-01-2016, 11:22 AM
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And maybe that's the key...he's not rational.
Omit "maybe" from this sentence, and you've answered your own question.

Keep the focus on you. What he does or doesn't do is no longer your concern, and trying to figure out why he does what he does is a recipe for a cognitive feedback loop that'll trap you. And I think you've had enough of being trapped.

That said...the fact his "whatever" is in The Clink (my affectionate term for a psych ward) does not surprise me.
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