Notices

What do I do

Old 02-29-2016, 10:05 PM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Jun 2015
Posts: 280
What do I do

I've been here before many times.
I e tried AA twice and just couldn't stick. I drink beer. About 1-2 times per week, 8-9 cans each time. Is this a problem? I know only I can answer that but I need perspective. I can't help myself in Fridays. On Monday I'll be so determined to quit. By Friday my mind is so soft I just float to the bar and drink. I know I need to stop because it's affecting my health. I feel guilt about drinking because it was truly out of control daily drinking for many years and only in the last 5 years settled down to once a week.

The thing about AA is.. That I've read in the big book that I may be an unfortunate, who cannot or will not be honest with myself. I can. I just can't help myself of Friday. My AA friends said to call a sponsor or friend when I have the urge. But when I have the urge that's the last thing I would want to do.. And it starts all over again.

I know I sound hopeless. But looking back.. Alcohol has ruled my life and decisions since I was 18. I'm almost 40 now.

Does anyone have any experience with Naltrexone or Baclofen? Have read good things about those drugs.

Thanks
Silver11 is offline  
Old 02-29-2016, 10:28 PM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Dee74's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,043
Hi Drash

I have no experience with meds. I went right to the source and battled my desire to drink.

Whatever method you eventually choose, or what meds you and your Dr might work out, I think you need to have a commitment to recovery, and to change.

I don;t believe there's anyone here who's incapable of change - we may just underestimate the task a little.

If you want change you need to make changes I think and that means lifestyle changes, changes with the way you deal with stress, problems, strong emotions, or even Friday nights.

I think supports really important - and reaching out for that support when you need it is even more important.

If you really feel AA is not for you, there are other alternatives - SMART Recovery, LifeRing, Rational Recovery...all a few mouse clicks away on
Google

You don't sound hopeless to me - you sound like a guy in need of a plan, that's all

There's are some good ideas here:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html

D
Dee74 is offline  
Old 02-29-2016, 11:16 PM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Member
 
Kevin78's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Scotland
Posts: 396
I never got AA the 1st time. Sometimes it takes people numerous attempts to hear the message. There's a Man that comes to my group on occasion, And he's been trying since the mid 90's to stay sober. He keeps trying.
If you decide to go back, Try talking to someone. I found I got extra help if I arrived earlier, as group members usually are early to help set up. You usually find yourself sharing and swapping advice without noticing.

All the best, and don't give up.

Last edited by Kevin78; 02-29-2016 at 11:17 PM. Reason: Edit.
Kevin78 is offline  
Old 03-01-2016, 12:35 AM
  # 4 (permalink)  
bona fido dog-lover
 
least's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,671
I hope the support here can help you get sober for good.
least is offline  
Old 03-01-2016, 12:43 AM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Member
 
Rmz250's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 66
Hi Drash

If you believe drinking is a problem then it is, your external life doesn't need to be falling apart to justify internal pain. You are not hopeless, like someone already said you just need a plan.

1stly you need to commit to sobriety. In the beginning it will be difficult to resist having a drink. This is because you brain is hard wired to drink through repeated behaviour over years. It's your brains response to any number of things, be it boredom, insecurity, negative feelings, apathy, feelings of elation etc.

As long as you give in to the urges you are strengthening these neuro pathways in the brain so that picking up a drink remains compulsive. If you stop acting on that behaviour in time the neuro pathways will weaken but it takes time.

I've made the mistake in the past of thinking that all I need to do is stop drinking long enough and the desire will go away. This is white knuckling it and it won't last forever. I guess if you could do it long enough the desire to drink would eventually subside but I doubt you would be very happy. You need to create new neuro pathways by practicing new, positive behaviours. This is the hard part and takes discipline. Your brain would rather do the familiar and easier option of picking up a drink. It doesn't care whether the behaviour is positive or negative. Over time the neuro pathways associated with drinking will fade and the ones associated with more positive behaviours will strengthen.

You will need to figure out for yourself what positive behaviours you want to pursue. For me it's exercise and getting in shape, taking more pride in my job (I'm a carpenter), playing golf, building wooden model ships, hiking and appreciating nature, reading and Learning. In the future I want to study.

Because you would go for a drink on a Friday it's very important you find something else to do on that night and stick to it. I too have been in and out of AA and it's not for me but I do think it has a lot of positives, especially in early recovery. It's a place to connect with others who aren't drinking and by focusing on others you are distracted from what your negative brain is telling you. If what they preach is what you struggle with try not take it too seriously and rather focus on the people in the room and there experience. A meeting might be the best thing you can do on a Friday night in place of drinking. Also try SMART recovery meetings.

No matter what don't drink, if the noise in your head becomes too much call someone (this is where AA is good) reach out to people here on sober recovery too. I know it's last thing you want to do but do it. Things that are difficult or even painful in the beginning become easier with practice. The most important thing is not to drink. Also be careful of replacing drinking with negative behaviour. These could also create neuro pathways that are unhealthy.

You are not your brain and you are more powerful than your brain you just need to feed it positivity. At a later stage you might want to also seek councilling if there are deep seated emotional issues that need addressing.

I just want to add that I'm not a mental health professional. Everything I've said here relates to my own experience, research and what makes sense to me and has helped me stay sober. The most important thing is your desire to stay sober and change your life. If you have that and nurture it anything is possible. You don't have to do it alone either. Good luck with your journey ahead.
Rmz250 is offline  
Old 03-01-2016, 02:42 AM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Member
 
Meraviglioso's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 4,251
I think Rez made a great point about coming up with a new habit for Friday. Just sitting at home waiting for it to pass won't really change things up for you. Is there and activity that you could do on Fridays that would appeal to you? Maybe going to the cinema and getting popcorn and watching a new film? Participating on a recreational sports team? Going to the library and reading?

I haven't tried either of the medications you mentioned though I have also heard positive things about them. I have tried Campral though and had really good results. When I say "really good results" I do not, by any means, mean a miracle. It didn't turn me into a normal drinker, it didn't wipe away any hint of cravings, but it did make it easier for me to manage the cravings that came up. If I chose to drink on it, which I did several times, I *might* have noticed a slight bit more control on the first drink- siping slower, not feeling that crazy craziness. But I'm an alcoholic and no medicine will completely erase that, so more often than not once I got past that first, slow drink it was off to the races and total chaos as usual.
However, to re-cap, I'm a big fan of the medication. It just can't be used without other, solid techniques to avoid drinking. It is just a little boost.
Meraviglioso is offline  
Old 03-01-2016, 03:11 AM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Member
 
ICanDoBetter's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Northeast US
Posts: 773
I'm by no means an expert but perhaps this Friday make alternate plans ahead of time. Just try to tackle one friday first.
ICanDoBetter is offline  
Old 03-01-2016, 03:49 AM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Member
 
Steely's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: NSW - Australia
Posts: 14,272
I've tried Naltrexone and Campril and all they seemed to do was to have me drink more effectively but not reduce consumption. I was offered Baclofen when I was in re-hab but after reading all of the side-effects connected to it decided to give it a miss. Many of the other 'patients' took it without having read the same information and were asked to sign a waiver. It must have become standard practice in the meantime. Personally, I just had to 'get it' and decide that I preferred and wanted sobriety more than I wanted to drink. Pros and cons. I know that our alcoholism is not based on quantity imbibed but how any amount effects us, but for health reasons alone you are binge drinking and binge drinkers are at greater risk than your everyday drinker. Apparently the assault is felt more profoundly. That's what I've heard at anyrate and am happy to be corrected. lol Sounds to me that you really don't want to drink. It seems to be troubling you which is a good enough reason to stop. Keep posting and talk it out.
Steely is offline  
Old 03-01-2016, 03:53 AM
  # 9 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: MAYNARD
Posts: 7
You know they say if you ask yourself if drinking is a problem in your life, it is! Make another plan for Friday nights...Find sober friends to go out with you and once you start doing things that don't involve alcohol you'll see how easy it is and how much better you feel that night and especially the next morning. Set goals, make plans, stay safe! You can do it, the desire is there...
Jacksonbaily is offline  
Old 03-01-2016, 04:39 AM
  # 10 (permalink)  
Do your best
 
Soberwolf's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
Have you tried SR Smart AVRT Lifering have you searched for help from your Dr or local hospital ? have you made a plan to stick to all this

Do whatever it takes to get sober
Soberwolf is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 08:24 AM.