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Be Kind Always and be Kind to Yourself

Old 02-25-2016, 01:47 AM
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Be Kind Always and be Kind to Yourself

A stupid title for what I think is an important discussion/dialogue.

A lot of people come to this site in the most excruciatingly abandoning circumstances.

Many of us have been through treatment before, read the quit lit and are starting anew in a place that we hope, against all hope, will be our last attempt.

Be kind always, because it helps you to be kind to yourself.

If you are two months, two weeks, six weeks sober, please remember what it was like to be at the pit of the beginning of the slow crawl to a lucid, meaningful life. It was confusing, it was infuriating and you needed compassion. I know that is what got me through some of my worst times.
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Old 02-25-2016, 01:57 AM
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Yes, I hope I never forget what it was like to come here that first day - frightened , sad, fragile, angry - and the relief I felt when people here *understood*

Thanks for the reminder Pouncer

D
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Old 02-25-2016, 02:27 AM
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Excellent post Pouncer
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Old 02-25-2016, 02:39 AM
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Absolutely on point and something I needed to hear today. Thanks.
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Old 02-25-2016, 02:51 AM
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I don't mind being hard on myself a bit. I think it's counterpoint for all the years I shifted blame onto others for my own failings.

I'm happy to be kind to myself when I earn it, but the days of giving myself a pass are long gone.
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Old 02-25-2016, 03:20 AM
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I think there is a difference between being hard on yourself and taking responsibility for your own actions.

I think pouncer is saying don't be mean or berating to others or yourself.
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Old 02-25-2016, 08:11 AM
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I will never forget how I felt when I came here - broken and in despair.

It's always been easy for me to be kind to others, not so easy to be kind to myself.
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Old 02-25-2016, 08:32 AM
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Thanks, Pouncer, for this wonderful post.

It is great to have you back, btw. We missed you.
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Old 02-25-2016, 08:33 AM
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Yes, fragile and vulnerable. Of course when we get a snootful, that fragility and vulnerability goes away with liquid courage, but once the liquid courage is gone, we are laid bare once again. Stick around Pouncer, there are good people here that can and will help you to the extent they can.
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Old 02-25-2016, 08:39 AM
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Originally Posted by Thumpalumpacus View Post
I don't mind being hard on myself a bit. I think it's counterpoint for all the years I shifted blame onto others for my own failings.

I'm happy to be kind to myself when I earn it, but the days of giving myself a pass are long gone.
I don't believe anymore that drinking is a personal failing. The thing is that alcohol is poison and addictive. It is a personal mistake to try to solve problems by drinking-it becomes a deathly spiral that slowly kills you and your spirit. I really don't think I can stay sober if I keep telling myself I am defective or that I have failed. Alcohol is the problem, not me. After all, you and I and all of us are here fighting for ourselves.
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