emme99

I started drinking again about a week & 1/2 ago. I can't stop. I don't really know what to say. I saw my therapist today. She asked me if I was suicidal. I don't really want to die, I just want this to be over. I can't deal with it anymore. I don't really know what to say, I just feel like giving up.

Coldfusion

When I couldn't stop drinking and felt like giving up, I went to the hospital. They checked me out, gave me a couple IV's, and sent me to a no-cost, inpatient detox program. The time I spent there was brief, but it changed my life!

There is help available--all you have to do is ask for it.

Caramel

emme - from me, a caring

leviathan

I've been there. All I could do was latch onto the hope that things would be better if I could get straight. Then I went after that like it was the only thing that mattered. -cause it was.

Many of us have to try a couple times. Please give it another chance. Reach out for any help you can get.

You deserve peace and happiness. I hope you can find it.

venuscat

I think Coldfusion has some wonderful advice there emme.

Please don't give up love ~ I know this is hard, and I know I felt the same way many times. But it's so worth fighting through.

How do you feel about meetings?
Maybe some face to face help and care from other recovering alcoholics would be good right now.

Or a drug and alcohol counselling telephone line....there might be someone you can talk to right now who will be understanding and able to help you.

Sending you love. ♥

Lorax1981

Please don't give up emme. Put the drink down and get back at it. It takes time. That's why it's so dang hard. We feel like a couple weeks or months should do the trick but that's not usually the case. Get back at it and remember: if the only thing you do some days is stay sober, that's a good day. Keep you head up!

Pouncer

emme, thank you for your honesty. I feel a lot like you. For me, drinking is like a slow suicide.

Please take care. I (think I) know what you are going through. It is rough.

-Pouncer

venuscat

Sending you love Pouncer.

Jeni26

I felt the same as you 3 weeks ago...this just gets harder the more we relapse...more hopeless...more desperate.

I too had dark thoughts of not being able to carry on.

Now I'm 22 days sober again, for the last time, I'm seeing this as a fight for my life, quite literally.

I'm going to meetings as often as I can, I'm working with a new sponsor, I'm starting a new meditation class tonight. I'm exercising and trying to eat properly. I'm in contact daily with other alcoholics, I'm sharing how I feel, and at the moment that's almost always panic or distress, but I'm sharing it anyway.

What my alcoholism would rather I do is phone in sick to work and hide under the duvet. It would rather I isolate.

I've had some good quality sober time. I remember what it feels like to be free of the obsession and be truly happy in my own skin, and I would do anything to feel like that again.

You are worth fighting for...and we are in this together.

Hang in there. Make this the last time you EVER have to feel like this again.

You can do it, I believe in you ❤️

Pouncer

"Drinking will kill me. If I start thinking any differently, it's a lie."

I think that alcoholics have a completely different challenge and constitution as other addicts. When was the last time that you went out with friends just for a little bit of heroin? A happy hour?

I feel that a lot of us can relate to each other. I miss the times when I was not a desperate binging or abstaining alcoholic. Several years ago, I was not the person with the same obsession that I have today.

It will never change. This is pretty much all I care about. I care enough about another alternative, so much that I am back on this site.

Please take care, Emme. It is very hard to feel how you do now. It is the worst of all human experience. I hope you feel better very soon.

venuscat

It can change.
And I think you just said it yourself love; you care about yourself and your life still. You care about finding a better way to live.

Jenny said it so well, her post should be a sticky.

You are worth fighting for....and we are in this together.

emme99

Thanks everyone~ I won't give up I just can't believe how hard this is. Thanks again for your comments and support.

Dee74

I'm glad you're not giving up Emme.

Go back to your recovery plan.

If you haven't got one, make one

It really can make so much difference

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html

Upward2Enlightenment

Just remember emme ... it is hard, not impossible!

I agree and disagree pouncer. I am a recovering drug addict but not an alcoholic, and I say recovering because I know that I will always be one. In the heights of my addiction say come by later and we'll get high.
However the BIG difference is that alcohol use is socially acceptable and easily available, legally.
Also, not that long ago, I ran into someone I used to get high with and he told me to stop on by and we'll get buzzed.

I will acknowledge that recovering alcoholics are much stronger than I may be. Just don't give up.

FarToGo

Sending you love, courage and strength.
xx

least

I've felt that same despair when I was drinking. I had to take a leap of faith and put the bottle down so I could begin to see and think clearly. It took a while but my attitude slowly changed. I now focus on the positives and I truly enjoy my life.

I hope you can get sober and realize you are worth more than drinking your life away.

On The Road

Hi emme. One thing's for sure, when you stop drinking the anxiety and depression will ease up. And the longer you stop, the better you'll feel. This will give you the opportunity to deal with your underlying causes for your alcoholism. It's great that you have a therapist. One on one counseling is a part of my recovery plan and it's really made a difference for my long term sobriety.

Today is the day to change your life for the better. If I can do it, so can you!

Hawkeye13

emme don't quit quitting--you are worth it

strategery

Don't give up Emme. You can do this. Why not join us again on the 24 hour thread?

Soberwolf

I have so much faith in your recovery Emme Id also suggest checking out more threads like joining a class if you havnt already & joining the 24h thread to commit to another 24h

I'm going to include links that will help with everything from building a plan to helpful threads links to help with urge & cravings to looking for something to do and a great reading list

There is lots of links there that are guaranteed to help Emme I put it together to help anyone in a number of diffrent ways see what you think

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ful-links.html