ICanDoBetter

Ok - I can admit that I get bitchy when I'm tense or have anxiety. Until 5 days ago the solution was have a drink to calm down - but it was never just 1.

So - fresh from the tension/anxiety of a crowded and loud environment all morning, we stopped for lunch. I ordered iced tea. Our younger son (6) was in a mood and whining wasn't helping me. I looked at my husband and whispered "I'm going to lose it." His response was to pick up his beer and hold it out and ask if I wanted it. (Reminded me of when my dad would try to quit smoking and he'd get so intolerable that people bought him cigarettes.

I looked at him and said, "Are you kidding?" (Granted, he knows I'm trying to make a change but not that I'm stopping altogether.)

He kind of shrugged like "what!"

I more or less calmly explained that if I wanted a beer I would have ordered one. That I have to figure out how to deal with when I get anxiety and work through it without a drink. That having a drink to cope in those moments is what got me into this mess in the first place.

He didn't have a lot to say, but we then went about a nice family lunch. But I was peeved!

(And it's shocking to me that smell of beer , at least on his breath, is thoroughly disgusting - I wouldn't have thought that'd effect me so soon.)

least

The important thing is, you stayed sober.

Anna

It's really hard to expect your spouse to understand what you're going through. I found the same thing in the early days and at first I was upset, but I quickly realized I was going to have to rely on myself to get through this. It actually made me stronger.

Making a plan to be prepared in situations like that is a good idea. I'm glad you got through that and stayed sober.