thomas11

I was sitting around tonight, bored stiff, so I decided to go back in my posts:

I just need to post. My only modes of transportation right now are wheelchair and walker. I can't drive and won't be able to for at least another month. I'm supposed to be taking it easy...and its impossible. I left the house yesterday at 7AM and didn't get back to the house until 6:48PM, I was busy as hell again today. I made my work list for tomorrow and I have 14 things on that list. Between all the work that encompasses running a construction related business and dealing with all the medical professionals (therapy, dr. visits for updates etc...) I am busier than ever. Not to mention all the phone calls from everyone wanting an "update". I should be thankful for all the caring people, but for crying out loud, I'm so squeezed for time, phone calls to chit chat are a complete waste of time. Worse yet, the narcotics are wreaking havoc on my memory. If I don't enter into a spreadsheet, or my computer calendar and take it everywhere on my clipboard I will definitively forget. Lastly, I am great in the morning until about 1PM, then I'm done. My batteries are dead, no energy, pain levels are elevated and now I'm noticing the swelling in my legs has increased and I know why. I'm doing more than I'm supposed to be.

I cannot just sit around here feeling sorry for myself, I have to get out and do as much as I can. In my line of work we make about 50% of our annual income from now and September. I'm not sure how to approach this. I do not want to lose any business, but I also want to follow the protocol the Dr.'s have outlined for me which includes "don't over do it" from everyone. On top of this, they want me to attend 2 physical therapy sessions a week, my first one being today. I could try and talk about this with someone but they wouldn't care anyway, its not their problem. If I talk about work related stuff with my wife she looks at me like I'm speaking German (regarding work projects etc..) , she's incredibly supportive but just doesn't understand. Nor do I expect her to.

And in the end, I lost it all. Very sobering. Alcohol is really bad for most of us. The sad thing is, many very financially successful people lead a life of expensive cigars, Bentley's and expensive alcohol. It frustrates me, and confounds me.
I'm currently watching the debate between Sanders and Clinton and my jaw is on the floor. Its only on the floor because Clinton will crush Sanders in the elections as they progress.

thomas11

For anyone who has been on this site for any length of time, sucking it up and going back to read your old posts has some value. At least in my opinion. I am sitting here rather dumbfounded. But yes, it was me. I own it.

Dee74

That may be true, but I'm not one of them.

It took me many years to accept that, but accepting it set me free

I'm not financially successful by any means LOL but I'm successful in other ways that mean more to me

I also know that for every successful person you can find who drinks, you can find another successful person who doesn't drink anymore or never has.

I had to stop buying the image of success happiness and fulfillment my family, and the media was feeding me, cos that way would kill me.

I made my own way I thought my own thoughts and I made my own definitions of success.

I think you'll find thats another constant element in successful people's stories and IMO a far more useful one than 'they drink'.

D

thomas11

Dee, please don't misunderstand me. I am confounded that there are salt of the earth, hardworking people in life that get nothing. Yet there are people in the United States (and I am guessing throughout the world) that achieve a superior material lifestyle through immoral gains. If my sole goal in life was to be rich and drive a Rolls Royce, I could do it, but I'd have to crush good hard working people to do it, and that's not me.

Dee74

Nah, I didn't misunderstand you - I just don't talk politics here
I gave my reply a recovery twist
D

Maffers

Was it lost? Man made the money, money never made the man. I love the heck out of what I do for a living, sure I'm not gunna get mega rich doing it but I simply don't care. I choose to spend my money wisely. Of course being an alcoholic I didn't always. I could be driving a fancy new car with the money I spent on treatment, but I consider it a wise investment in myself. Besides I feel much greater pride in having something I rebuilt myself.

SoberinSyracuse

I'm interested in this thing called "peak performance." Being the best you can be. I've been reading up on high performers in various fields and was not surprised to find that an awful lot of them don't drink!

I've come to believe that no matter how well someone who drinks is doing, they'd be doing quite a bit better if they kicked alcohol to the curb.

Soberwolf

Reading old posts is great for reflection good job jeff

FarToGo

Well Thomas you certainly start some great conversations and stimulate some brilliant advice from some very wise folk. I read in another thread of yours that you like positive comments, I mean this one genuinely. The two threads I've read today have both been started by you and they've helped me as I'm sure they have others. Be well.
Thank you
xx

thomas11

I'm listening to my morning radio show and they are live on location at a Casino in the state. The bar opened at 8AM and the live crowd suddenly got very noisy. Sad state of affairs, but a stark reminder of the power alcohol has on people.

dwtbd

I'm not saying this with the intent of 'beating you up', but my observation of this entire thread is that it is a example of deflection writ large.

One of the truths that can be drawn is that , yes indeed for ''us' alcohol is 'bad', cutting drinking completely out of our lives will solve that 'badness', it is a simple solution but not an easy one. Nothing is gained from looking outward at 'alcohol' in the world, that energy is better used in the universe of the self.

I go to the casino and my 'lucky' machine is at the bar, I killed all the 'power' alcohol had over me by quitting, and I don't regret it one iota. I can't and don't worry about the others at the bar, it's not my job.

Fly N Buy

I can't drive down the road looking in rear view mirror. It's only there if I intend on backing up. Pondering the great mysteries of life - who has more or less and why - has no meaning for me today. That was ole fly and bar room talk. We could solve all the worlds problems in a couple hours over a dozen drinks.......yea, right.

Today I went to the gym (remarkably enough), engaged in my daily readings and meditation, talked on the phone with another alcoholic and had a bowl of 10 grain cereal for Bfast - All before 9am.

Who the heck is this guy?????

My neighbors porch light doesn't have to go out so mine shines brighter........

Folks at the casino bar has no relevance to me good or bad. It just is

Well done on two + weeks!
keep coming back

thomas11

Sounds like a great way to start the day Fly N Bye.

Fly N Buy

Nothing special, just a regular day really. What is remarkable is that an ole run of the mill drunk can change. Any of us can, certainly.

Change started with my stinkin thinkin......

brynn

Can't put a price on inner peace

thomas11

I don't feel beat up, we all approach things differently. I don't think one way is superior to another as long as the end result is achieved. I make a conscious effort to try not to tell people what to do because what makes me tick, may fall on deaf ears of another. I simply encourage people to keep fighting the good fight. As long as one does that, they are still in the game.

Soberwolf

I like this post

thomas11

My day of reckoning is coming, I just need to start. I envy you in that respect.