This is all new to me
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: Rishon Lezion
Posts: 8
This is all new to me
Hey all,
First of all nice to meet all of you.
So its only been a couple of days since I have really admitted to myself that I have an issue and it basically came after me and my wife had a big argument and she called me a drunk.
I don't blame here, its true!
So now i'm looking for any advice on what to do to stay off the booze!
I have already called an AA meeting place and will go there in the next couple of days, If anyone else has some sort of suggestions to keeping away from the alcohol please please share.
Thanks all in advance
Dave
First of all nice to meet all of you.
So its only been a couple of days since I have really admitted to myself that I have an issue and it basically came after me and my wife had a big argument and she called me a drunk.
I don't blame here, its true!
So now i'm looking for any advice on what to do to stay off the booze!
I have already called an AA meeting place and will go there in the next couple of days, If anyone else has some sort of suggestions to keeping away from the alcohol please please share.
Thanks all in advance
Dave
Member
Join Date: May 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 1,042
I'm going to let the more experienced folk here give you the advice you seek. But they'll answer soon and there will be lots of good stuff. Just wanted to say welcome and good luck for your sober journey.
xx
xx
You're not shackled to not drinking, you're free from drinking
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 1,406
Welcome to SR. There's lots of good people, wisdom, and advice here. The place you want to stay is putting together a plan on how you're going to get sober, and more importantly, how you'll stay sober.
See this, http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
See this, http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: Northwest
Posts: 4,215
Welcome. I'm only on Day 36 myself this time, and I'm sure the grownups will be along shortly. This is a wonderful resource...supportive, open-minded, and it gives a lot of perspectives. I have been pretty much living here,
First, get the booze out of the house. Dump it or give it away if you know people you don't mind giving poison to.
Second, sit down and figure out when and where you are triggered to drink and rearrange your life so that you can avoid those situations. If you drank in a certain bar on the way home, change your route. If you mostly drank at home at night, make a list of other activities that get you out of the house.
Make a plan and write it down as to what you will do if a craving hits. Go to a meeting, read your list of reasons you want to quit, eat ice cream, etc.
Read. I like the secular, scientific approach to alcohol addiction, so Annie Grace's "This Naked Mind" is great for that. Understanding that both alcohol addiction and withdrawal symptoms are a function of the chemical alcohol and not some internal moral failing is, to me, a big help.
You don't mention how much you are accustomed to drinking. You may need medical care while you detox. Talking to your doctor right up front would be optimal.
There are so many great people here who are doing this. You can, too!
First, get the booze out of the house. Dump it or give it away if you know people you don't mind giving poison to.
Second, sit down and figure out when and where you are triggered to drink and rearrange your life so that you can avoid those situations. If you drank in a certain bar on the way home, change your route. If you mostly drank at home at night, make a list of other activities that get you out of the house.
Make a plan and write it down as to what you will do if a craving hits. Go to a meeting, read your list of reasons you want to quit, eat ice cream, etc.
Read. I like the secular, scientific approach to alcohol addiction, so Annie Grace's "This Naked Mind" is great for that. Understanding that both alcohol addiction and withdrawal symptoms are a function of the chemical alcohol and not some internal moral failing is, to me, a big help.
You don't mention how much you are accustomed to drinking. You may need medical care while you detox. Talking to your doctor right up front would be optimal.
There are so many great people here who are doing this. You can, too!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,044
Hi Dave,
Welcome!! You will find lots of support on SR. Spend some time reading and posting, also, make sure to read Dee's link about coming up with a plan. Someone has post d it above.
Glad you are here!
❤️Delilah
Welcome!! You will find lots of support on SR. Spend some time reading and posting, also, make sure to read Dee's link about coming up with a plan. Someone has post d it above.
Glad you are here!
❤️Delilah
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: Rishon Lezion
Posts: 8
Originally Posted by Ariesagain 
Welcome. I'm only on Day 36 myself this time, and I'm sure the grownups will be along shortly. This is a wonderful resource...supportive, open-minded, and it gives a lot of perspectives. I have been pretty much living here,
First, get the booze out of the house. Dump it or give it away if you know people you don't mind giving poison to.
Second, sit down and figure out when and where you are triggered to drink and rearrange your life so that you can avoid those situations. If you drank in a certain bar on the way home, change your route. If you mostly drank at home at night, make a list of other activities that get you out of the house.
Make a plan and write it down as to what you will do if a craving hits. Go to a meeting, read your list of reasons you want to quit, eat ice cream, etc.
Read. I like the secular, scientific approach to alcohol addiction, so Annie Grace's "This Naked Mind" is great for that. Understanding that both alcohol addiction and withdrawal symptoms are a function of the chemical alcohol and not some internal moral failing is, to me, a big help.
You don't mention how much you are accustomed to drinking. You may need medical care while you detox. Talking to your doctor right up front would be optimal.
There are so many great people here who are doing this. You can, too!
First, get the booze out of the house. Dump it or give it away if you know people you don't mind giving poison to.
Second, sit down and figure out when and where you are triggered to drink and rearrange your life so that you can avoid those situations. If you drank in a certain bar on the way home, change your route. If you mostly drank at home at night, make a list of other activities that get you out of the house.
Make a plan and write it down as to what you will do if a craving hits. Go to a meeting, read your list of reasons you want to quit, eat ice cream, etc.
Read. I like the secular, scientific approach to alcohol addiction, so Annie Grace's "This Naked Mind" is great for that. Understanding that both alcohol addiction and withdrawal symptoms are a function of the chemical alcohol and not some internal moral failing is, to me, a big help.
You don't mention how much you are accustomed to drinking. You may need medical care while you detox. Talking to your doctor right up front would be optimal.
There are so many great people here who are doing this. You can, too!
Already dumped the remaining alcohol down the sink! Didn't want to even see it in my house.
The amount I drink? It varies I will drink almost every night depending on what is in the house...... if there is one beer ill drink that, if there is six then its six.
This particular night it was around 2 or 3 bottles of wine and maybe 4 or 5 500ml bottles of beer (hard to remember)
I'm so disgusted in how I acted that I just want it gone and for my wife to forgive me. We have a 5 month old baby as well.
I am no risk to my wife or the child (I would never lay a hand on them) I did punch a door, make a hole in and break the door handle it during this argument.
I CANNOT LET THAT HAPPEN AGAIN!!
I need a change!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 704
Welcome to SR, you are in the right place, this site and the position in your life to go ahead and quit drinking and partake of the information and support here as you go.
Things get better being sober, it won't happen overnight .. but if you keep at it and seek out what will work for you it will in time.
Things get better being sober, it won't happen overnight .. but if you keep at it and seek out what will work for you it will in time.
I could see peace instead of this
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Canada, eh
Posts: 2,360
Welcome to SR, Dave!
You've found a wonderful resource for support and information if you want to stop drinking. It sounds like you're already motivated to make some changes.
Stick around and you'll figure out what you need to do. Read and ask questions or just share your experience. People here are pretty helpful.
You've found a wonderful resource for support and information if you want to stop drinking. It sounds like you're already motivated to make some changes.
Stick around and you'll figure out what you need to do. Read and ask questions or just share your experience. People here are pretty helpful.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: Rishon Lezion
Posts: 8
Originally Posted by Zebra1275
AA and this place helped me get, and stay sober. It's been years now.
But why wait for an AA meeting, can you find one that meets today?
But why wait for an AA meeting, can you find one that meets today?
The issue is that I live in a non English speaking country so its not the easiest thing to find straight away which sucks.
Tuesday isn't that far away though plus SR will keep me sane until then I think
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
welcome, Davowz!!
Getting yourself through the door of an AA meeting asap is a very good place to start.
Staying sober is nothing if it's not reinforced with action. Good intentions, hopes, desires, I think I'll try's and all the rest of it are pretty much useless against the downward spiral of addiction if not followed up with actions.
AA gives you something to DO, a real action behind your intent. Get a Big Book while you're there. Start reading it. Again - ACTION.
Keep coming on here and sharing and reading and keep your head in learning about sobriety every day - ACTION.
Look at your immediate life and get honest about the situations you should steer clear of for now; regular get-togethers with buddies at the bar? Upcoming alcohol-fueled events? Celebrations that will most likely revolve around drinking? Make another plan for all of those. Make it now, while you're committed to sobriety and make firm alternative plans so that you won't cave and you'll have a reason not to attend those things.
There will be more as you go, but right now you need basic blocking and tackling in place, or the motivation you feel at the moment will become challenged as the unpleasant memories fade and the temptation of your addictive voice comes back 'round whispering "c'mon man... it wasn't THAT bad... no need for all this sobriety nonsense.... you just need to take it a little easier.... dial it back a little... it's FINE".
welcome, we're here for ya.
Getting yourself through the door of an AA meeting asap is a very good place to start.
Staying sober is nothing if it's not reinforced with action. Good intentions, hopes, desires, I think I'll try's and all the rest of it are pretty much useless against the downward spiral of addiction if not followed up with actions.
AA gives you something to DO, a real action behind your intent. Get a Big Book while you're there. Start reading it. Again - ACTION.
Keep coming on here and sharing and reading and keep your head in learning about sobriety every day - ACTION.
Look at your immediate life and get honest about the situations you should steer clear of for now; regular get-togethers with buddies at the bar? Upcoming alcohol-fueled events? Celebrations that will most likely revolve around drinking? Make another plan for all of those. Make it now, while you're committed to sobriety and make firm alternative plans so that you won't cave and you'll have a reason not to attend those things.
There will be more as you go, but right now you need basic blocking and tackling in place, or the motivation you feel at the moment will become challenged as the unpleasant memories fade and the temptation of your addictive voice comes back 'round whispering "c'mon man... it wasn't THAT bad... no need for all this sobriety nonsense.... you just need to take it a little easier.... dial it back a little... it's FINE".
welcome, we're here for ya.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Welcome. This place and AA really helped me. You'll get loads of good advice there. There are lots of old threads about going to your first meeting that might help if you're a bit nervous / anxious about it (which most people are).
In the meantime, keep hydrated, and get plenty of rest if you can.
Keep in mind HALT. This is an anacronym for the most common triggers for cravings, which are:
Hunger (ice cream or candy will give you a good jolt of sugar if you start getting cravings, but it'll be less tiring and better for your mood if you can keep your blood sugar up with slow release carbs - fruit; wholemeal pasta; jacket potato; porridge; whatever)
Anger (and actually, in my humble opinion any extreme emotions Eg. a lottory win would have been a big trigger for me personally) - some of this we can control - eg staying away from people who irritate us or are likely to be argumentative. But actually, awareness is pretty key here. Ie. you have an argument then get a craving - at least knowing what sparked it makes it have less of a mystical hold over you.
Lonely - often we're tempted to isolate. Don't. Seek out SOBER people who make you laugh and who you love, or at least like.
Tired
Good luck at your meeting - let us know how it goes
In the meantime, keep hydrated, and get plenty of rest if you can.
Keep in mind HALT. This is an anacronym for the most common triggers for cravings, which are:
Hunger (ice cream or candy will give you a good jolt of sugar if you start getting cravings, but it'll be less tiring and better for your mood if you can keep your blood sugar up with slow release carbs - fruit; wholemeal pasta; jacket potato; porridge; whatever)
Anger (and actually, in my humble opinion any extreme emotions Eg. a lottory win would have been a big trigger for me personally) - some of this we can control - eg staying away from people who irritate us or are likely to be argumentative. But actually, awareness is pretty key here. Ie. you have an argument then get a craving - at least knowing what sparked it makes it have less of a mystical hold over you.
Lonely - often we're tempted to isolate. Don't. Seek out SOBER people who make you laugh and who you love, or at least like.
Tired
Good luck at your meeting - let us know how it goes
Urban Hermit
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 1,586
Welcome to SR.
A few suggestions (things I find helpful, and that you may also):
1. Join the Class of February 2016 thread. You will find support there from other people in the early days of sobriety. Post as often as you like, especially if you are struggling.
2. Post every day in the 24-hour support thread. You don't have to say much, but just posting there helps me commit to another sober day.
3. Try the Tuesday and Friday chat meetings here. I have found these to be very helpful, and the people in the meetings are a great bunch.
4. Read around the forum, and contribute where you can. This is a peer support forum, and it works best when we all help each other.
A few suggestions (things I find helpful, and that you may also):
1. Join the Class of February 2016 thread. You will find support there from other people in the early days of sobriety. Post as often as you like, especially if you are struggling.
2. Post every day in the 24-hour support thread. You don't have to say much, but just posting there helps me commit to another sober day.
3. Try the Tuesday and Friday chat meetings here. I have found these to be very helpful, and the people in the meetings are a great bunch.
4. Read around the forum, and contribute where you can. This is a peer support forum, and it works best when we all help each other.
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