keeppushing

Quick question: I have developed/chosen new tools to deal with urges. But after decades of engaging and getting into an argument with the craving/urge/AV whatever you want to call it I nearly always fall back to that losing pattern instead of using a better tool (e.g. CBA/playing the tape forward, meditation, walk, etc.).

Any hints or experiences (successful or not)?

Thanks a lot,

KP

Dee74

I think whatever tools you use it takes a little practice to be able to turn to them in times of need.

Thats why I recommend trying out techniques like Urge Surfing regularly even if you're not 'in trouble'...you can focus on any feeling or any sensation

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...e-surfing.html

the better you know a technique, the more instinctive your response can be.

The other thing to consider is it's not a one time pass fail thing - if you're finding yourself falling back into old patterns you have the power to say NO as many times as you need to in order to get yourself into thinking and using a more positive tool

D

least

My new habit, at first, was just staying sober. But when I was still miserable around three months, I started practicing gratitude every day. And it made a difference. In my attitude, my sobriety, my serenity.

That's the only real habit I've developed to replace drinking. But it works well for me.

Obladi

My best "tool" thus far is to not engage in any discussion or argument with the craving/urge/AV. As there is really no answer but no, there is no need to engage. I notice the thought, acknowledge that it's uncomfortable, and then continue doing whatever it is I was doing. And within minutes, it's just gone.

The analogy of a wheedling toddler is the closest I can come to this. The kid wants a toy. I've already said no before and I'm happy to say no again if need be, but I've made up my mind and it's not an option. No need to get emotional about it; I've already made my choice.

TigerVoice

Thanks for posting this, Keep Pushing. I really relate.

Dee74, I just did Naomi Goodlet's Urge Surfing meditation (found on YouTube) and it was very powerful.
Great advice. Thank you!
Keep on pushing, Keep Pushing.

SoberinSyracuse

What's helping me is developing a lot of enthusiasm for my sober life. I'm finding people and things which I truly enjoy. If I find myself thinking about booze, it's not that hard to refocus on something else I like even better.

I may have had an unfair advantage. I got some medical treatment which was supposed to repair damaged brain function, including eliminating cravings and restoring the ability to find pleasure in other things. It seems to have worked.

It helps me to have a lot of other things to think about. Do you have some favorite interests or distractions you can turn to when an urge strikes?

Soberwolf

Acceptance my friend

keeppushing

I do. My issue is not what to do, it is to try and remember to do it in the heat of the moment. When I remember, things go well. When I don't, they go badly. That is the dillema, remembering the good things that I can do.

KP