hulbs

Hi. I'm new here, and in the scheme of things know very little about alcoholism.

I have a friend who I have known for only 11 months who has just voluntarily admitted himself to hospital for alcohol detox. Having only seen this friend once a week since meeting him, I am now questioning any ideas I may have formed around his personality. We drank together quite heavily on every meeting, so my impression of him is based solely on the 'drunk him'. This is his fourth day in detox and I *think* he is currently on 20mg of diazepam four-hourly.

My question is, does the person withdrawing from alcohol undergo personality changes during the process? I know that there would be a lot of factors involved, but what are your experiences?

Please help me!

phlowing

I wouldn't say a personality change, however if you only knew this person while drinking heavily there will be a difference in outward behavior. Your friend is also going through detox; this is a very turbulent process physically, mentally, and emotionally. For me I was basically dropped off at detox and just wanted to get through the week, doing what they told me to, without talking to anyone "outside". I would give your friend space, he probably needs it

LexieCat

I second the above. When I was detoxing at home (without any meds) it was like having a really bad case of the flu for a week. I felt like crap, my brain was in a fog. And even after detox it was months--close to a year--before I felt like I had most of my marbles back. So until your friend is alcohol free for quite some time, and more important, learning to live sober, you won't have much of an idea about his "sober" personality.

What about YOU? You say that you "drank heavily" together for 11 months. Have you thought about your own drinking pattern? Whether maybe you have a problematic relationship with alcohol?

hulbs

Sure LexiCat! I was a binge drinker for about fifteen years. Didn't have a drink for close to ten years, and don't feel the need to drink now. It took me a few years to get my marbles back too.

Carlotta

I must be missing something here.

LexieCat

Yeah, scratching my head, too.

Liveitwell

Um, me too. This doesbt add up.

AnvilheadII

this "new" math just baffles me............

DesertEyes

* self is counting his own marbles to see if maybe one rolled away ... which would explain why I can't figure out this "new math" *

Mike

Lilro

Huh?

DesertEyes

I was making a joke, but I can see it was not that good so feel free to ignore it

Mike

LexieCat

LOL, *I* got the joke, Mike.

It helps if you totally relate to losing one's marbles. At my former home group, for visitors celebrating an anniversary, we gave them a marble (rather than a coin/medallion, which gets expensive for a large meeting with lots of drop-ins). When the guy handed them the marble he'd say "Keep comin' back, till you get ALL your marbles back."

LexieCat

Of course, the "huh?" might have been a reference to the OP's math, rather than Mike's joke.

I think we are all thoroughly confused at this point.

Mango blast

hulbs, welcome to SR. Keep posting and keep coming back. It's good to have you here. Good questions and I appreciate bringing some curiosity to this confounding disease!

Alanon has been very informative for me. It's for the friends and family of alcoholics, a great world-wide group with in person support for us. Most meetings are a dollar or two voluntary donations, but you can go for free if you like. Your own drinking doesn't pertain to whether you're welcome at Alanon. You are.

hulbs

Yeah, I did post out of genuine concern for my friend. It's up to the reader whether they want to offer helpful advice or criticism. I'm open to both, though I don't think the sarcasm is all that well-meaning. x

LexieCat

We're genuinely puzzled about how you can say you WERE a binge drinker, didn't have a drink for 10 years, have no desire to drink now, yet you were "drinking heavily" with your friend for 11 months. It sounds to me like you're currently between binges.

I trust we've answered your question about your friend, and you don't have any obligation to explain your own drinking, but as a sober alcoholic myself, I'd suggest that you might have more of a problem than you're acknowledging--even to yourself.

Carlotta

I agree.

Liveitwell

Agreed. ^^ that sounds a lot like the funny math I used to hear from my then husband. It truly never added up!

Lilro

Lex and Mike

The Huh? WAS in reference to the math....lol
Glad I'm not the only one confused! Lol lol