MikeM

My family arranged for excellent treatment for alcoholics. I refused quickly after it started and now I'm hurting them by drinking.

I do not know how to stop. The only way would be for me to get locked up in a facility, but legally I'm not in that category.

Just going to try again tomorrow...

Mountainmanbob

You could commit yourself to a lock down treatment hospital.

I did that once many years ago
after running a muck with my drinking.

Mountainman

stevepearce

How long were you there for Mike ?

Meraviglioso

Sorry to hear that Mike. Would you consider going back? Have you ever tried prescription meds to get the cycle going?

Mountainmanbob

Can you take them back up on that offer?

Might save your family and your life?

Mountainman

Sunflowerlife

If you know what you are doing is going against what is good for you why do you keep doing it? It sounds like you are playing a role in life, no offense. Why not choose a different role? I have been following you since your first post and it seems you know what you need to do but refuse to do it. No one can help you, not even yourself until you decide it is time. That is the case for all of us Mike. I have been where you are and nothing helped until I was ready for a better life.

PennyLane76

Why did you refuse help? I have read some of your posts, not all, so this may be redundant, but a great first step is seeing your doctor and laying it all out there.

You may lose your family, you need to get help. This is a huge fight for us, we can't do it alone, grab onto as much help as you can, NOW. It only gets worse, and you know that.

MikeM

Today I did reach out to an expert who wants to help me. It's also a friend. I think it's my last resort.

MikeM

The refusing help came after the addiction kicked in and I got obsessed with it.

MikeM

I can. For now, I have found someone else who wants to help.

MikeM

If my friend can't help, I will consider meds.

MikeM

2 hours, give or take.

MikeM

That is a scary thought to me. No getting out? But if it needs to be done, I will do it as a last resort.

Meraviglioso

That sounds promising Mike.
Why not ask about medications? Antabuse makes it difficult to drink- you have a horrible reaction if you do. In combination with either Naltrexone or Campral (which reduce cravings/desire/pleasure for drinking) it helps a lot of people get headed on the path.
To be abundantly clear, medication is not enough. You MUST put work into your recovery. But I found medication (Campral) a good help to get me headed in the right direction. It helped me tick off a good period of sober days in a row to get my mind clear in order to more fully embrace the aspects of recovery that actually keep people like you, me and others sober. I too felt I couldn't break the cycle, medication was what helped me do just that. Combined with a pretty hefty support system and solid plan I have found success. You can too. I know it is hard to believe, but you can too.

stevepearce

It's exactly like the others have said Mike. The help is there but you have to accept it. Was the same for me. It's not easy but you have to be brave and open up my friend.

Meraviglioso

Oh and I want to add that I believe you when you say you want to get sober. I do. I know from experience how it is really hard for some people to get to the place of full surrender. I am certain that my actions said just the opposite of my words. I continuously proclaimed both here and offline how much I hated drinking, how very much I wanted to stop… and then I just kept picking up at every turn.
I can't explain what happened but my fight is finally stuttering to a stop. It wasn't a huge moment of surrender, but a gradual trickling off until finally I was stringing not just hours, but day and then weeks together. I'll never give up. I think that is what gives me hope that I will someday be solid in sobriety. You just have to keep trying Mike.

SoberLeigh

Alcoholism is a progressive disease, Mike; it only gets worse - much, much worse. Without treatment, your future is far scarier than a few months in a lock-down facility.

Seize the moment, Mike; get back to the treatment center.

Wishing you the best.

Fabat50

You stayed in an excellent treatment centre for only 2 hours before giving up and leaving? Did I understand that right? Is it an out or in patient facility?

MikeM

Inpatient. Within an hour everything became hazy and all I could think about was drinking. I have some conversation with a professional, but I was obsessing over drinking so I didn't listen much. And quickly after that I just told them that I didn't want to be there and left.

Nonsensical

I used to be a slave, too. I prefer my freedom to the bottle. I highly recommend it.