Bluehawaii

I'm blind to this behaviour but want to keep eyes open...everytime I try and have a mother daughter exclusive time ...( daughter is 24) my rah starts asking her to spend time with him.
She gets overwhelmed and angry because it is always after we have plans .
She feels she is bombarded and guilted to make things " fair"...
I think it's rediculous but don't want to be in the middle so encourage her to talk to him about how she feels.
This happened a lot while she was growing up as well.

shell2516

Oh many times.

Similar to you though- my mum (alcoholic) resents my fiance's parents and family because I visit them but my fiance refuses to visit my parents because of the drinking and hurt they've caused me. When I visit his family they drink, make sure to let me know how much they've drank so I worry all the time I'm there and generally make my life miserable for at least a week after.

I can imagine that must be difficult for both you and your daughter. Her having a chat with him about it sounds like it might be a good idea. How does she feel about talking to him?

Liveitwell

I married and had kids with an alcoholic-pure manipulation. Whole thing was a pack of lies.

NYCDoglvr

To be manipulated I have to let someone do it to me. I used to, but not anymore.