Hello
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 12
Hello
Hello all!
First time posting.. I guess someone's got to find a proper way to break the ice; I haven't found one. So here goes nothing: I live in a small remote village in Canada, father of 3 beautiful, energetic, and loud sons of 2,3 and 9 years old. I'm a worker in a moulding factory, volunteer firefighter an I do some community work in a housing program for the less fortunate.
I am also an addict. I consume alcohol as a coping mechanism. So any reason is an enabler. I have been going through that self-destructive cycle for the last 15 years. Every passing month slipping further down that road that can lead only to one thing: Change or die.
It started affecting my life when I got arrested for a DUI 4 months ago. Remember: I live in the s*****er, transportation is a must. So it affected the family, impacted on work, hell, its poisoning everything now. An sure enough, my sick subconscious knows how to deal with any tough situation and leads the rest of my pathetic self to the store that is conveniently located too close for comfort. Instant gratification, and it's right back to the same horsesh*t again. And let's not talk about my poor wife. I'm lucky she's still around at all..
I heard one phrase that has been a personal eye opener: "All the problems in the world can be traced to a father's due to their sons". It felt like I had just been hit in the head with a sledgehammer. One moment of complete clarity; the connection was made for one brief moment. I saw the kids, what the fu*k am I doing to the kids.. And I cried, I don't recall crying in the last decade. Or feeling much of anything at all.. I know at this point I need help. Before life takes charge of changing things for me.
I am ready
Thank you
First time posting.. I guess someone's got to find a proper way to break the ice; I haven't found one. So here goes nothing: I live in a small remote village in Canada, father of 3 beautiful, energetic, and loud sons of 2,3 and 9 years old. I'm a worker in a moulding factory, volunteer firefighter an I do some community work in a housing program for the less fortunate.
I am also an addict. I consume alcohol as a coping mechanism. So any reason is an enabler. I have been going through that self-destructive cycle for the last 15 years. Every passing month slipping further down that road that can lead only to one thing: Change or die.
It started affecting my life when I got arrested for a DUI 4 months ago. Remember: I live in the s*****er, transportation is a must. So it affected the family, impacted on work, hell, its poisoning everything now. An sure enough, my sick subconscious knows how to deal with any tough situation and leads the rest of my pathetic self to the store that is conveniently located too close for comfort. Instant gratification, and it's right back to the same horsesh*t again. And let's not talk about my poor wife. I'm lucky she's still around at all..
I heard one phrase that has been a personal eye opener: "All the problems in the world can be traced to a father's due to their sons". It felt like I had just been hit in the head with a sledgehammer. One moment of complete clarity; the connection was made for one brief moment. I saw the kids, what the fu*k am I doing to the kids.. And I cried, I don't recall crying in the last decade. Or feeling much of anything at all.. I know at this point I need help. Before life takes charge of changing things for me.
I am ready
Thank you
Last edited by Dee74; 01-28-2016 at 02:24 PM.
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Welcome.
There comes a moment when a change has to be made. It seems like you had that moment. I hope you can do all the things needed to see that change through to lasting sobriety.
There comes a moment when a change has to be made. It seems like you had that moment. I hope you can do all the things needed to see that change through to lasting sobriety.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Indiana
Posts: 1,472
Welcome and I'm glad to see you here! As doggonecarl said, eventually we all hit that point where reality sets in and we know we have to change. It seems you have hit that moment. The key now is to make a plan for how you intend to get on a sober path. Being a regular here and reaching out for advice is a good first step.
This is a good place to start. Psst...wanna know why I'm always recommending recovery plans
This is a good place to start. Psst...wanna know why I'm always recommending recovery plans
There's lots of support here for getting sober. Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 3,163
I am sorry for your pain, which many of us have shared.
It is not easy, but it is worth it.
You can do this, for yourself and those beautiful boys.
I love to hate Dr. Phil, but he said something once that really resonated with me.
He is the child of an alcoholic and decided when he was young not to drink because someone had to break the cycle.
If Dr; Phil can, you can.
Go for it.
It is not easy, but it is worth it.
You can do this, for yourself and those beautiful boys.
I love to hate Dr. Phil, but he said something once that really resonated with me.
He is the child of an alcoholic and decided when he was young not to drink because someone had to break the cycle.
If Dr; Phil can, you can.
Go for it.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 12
Thank you all for the welcomes. I really do appreciate it. I do have a question: I know for sure now that I have a bit of a DT issue.. Not so much during the day, but at night... omg. If I choose not to have a few drinks before bed, sleep time is a nightmare (litteraly) .. And if I'm not having nightmares it's shivering, sweating and freezing at the same time and heart palpitations and nausea.. And to top it all off I have my better half complaining I'm keepin' her awake and that I should stop tossing around... Anyone found a way to eliviate DT symptoms?
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 4,251
The best way to alleviate the symptoms is to stay sober long enough.
First, it might be a good idea to get checked out by a doctor. Sweating, insomnia and then nightmares when you finally do sleep are really fairly common. I think heart palpitations are as well but now we're talking your heart, not just a bad night of sleep, an appointment at the doctor wouldn't hurt, right?
There are tons of threads on dealing with insomnia. A couple of general tips that help are having a relaxing herbal tea before bed. I personally love Celestial Seasonings "Tension Tamer" but there are a ton out there, "Sleepytime" is another. Keep the room a bit cooler than normal and use extra blankets to stay warm. Lavender spray or cream promotes sleep. Take any plants out of the bedroom. A warm bath before bed is also a good way to slow down and get sleepy.
Exercise during the day will help you sleep at night and if it is vigorous enough will help you sweat out some of those toxins.
Congratulations on your decision, you are doing a wonderful thing for your family and for yourself.
First, it might be a good idea to get checked out by a doctor. Sweating, insomnia and then nightmares when you finally do sleep are really fairly common. I think heart palpitations are as well but now we're talking your heart, not just a bad night of sleep, an appointment at the doctor wouldn't hurt, right?
There are tons of threads on dealing with insomnia. A couple of general tips that help are having a relaxing herbal tea before bed. I personally love Celestial Seasonings "Tension Tamer" but there are a ton out there, "Sleepytime" is another. Keep the room a bit cooler than normal and use extra blankets to stay warm. Lavender spray or cream promotes sleep. Take any plants out of the bedroom. A warm bath before bed is also a good way to slow down and get sleepy.
Exercise during the day will help you sleep at night and if it is vigorous enough will help you sweat out some of those toxins.
Congratulations on your decision, you are doing a wonderful thing for your family and for yourself.
Behold the power of NO
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: WA
Posts: 7,764
Welcome to SR Ric
What you are experiencing when you don't drink for several hours are withdrawals symptoms. It means that you are physically addicted to alcohol and it makes you a possible candidate for the DTs (Delirium Tremens) or seizure.
I would recommend that you either go to medical detox at the hospital or that you see your GP and ask him/her to prescribe you a medication to help with the symptoms and prevent seizures.
Often in the States, they will prescribe Librium, in the UK they tell people to taper off (which I think is idiotic because most alcoholics can't )
I am not sure what they advise in Canada but you guys have an awesome health care system so I m sure there is some good help there. Hopefully, some Canadian members will jump in this thread.
When you quit, I would recommend that you do so when you have at least 3 days off in a row especially since you work in a factory and volunteer as a firefighter. You might be able to get away with working during the detox if you had an office job but you will need at least three days since you work physically (and need to be sharp firefighting).
Come here and post often, you will find a LOT of support on SR.
What you are experiencing when you don't drink for several hours are withdrawals symptoms. It means that you are physically addicted to alcohol and it makes you a possible candidate for the DTs (Delirium Tremens) or seizure.
I would recommend that you either go to medical detox at the hospital or that you see your GP and ask him/her to prescribe you a medication to help with the symptoms and prevent seizures.
Often in the States, they will prescribe Librium, in the UK they tell people to taper off (which I think is idiotic because most alcoholics can't )
I am not sure what they advise in Canada but you guys have an awesome health care system so I m sure there is some good help there. Hopefully, some Canadian members will jump in this thread.
When you quit, I would recommend that you do so when you have at least 3 days off in a row especially since you work in a factory and volunteer as a firefighter. You might be able to get away with working during the detox if you had an office job but you will need at least three days since you work physically (and need to be sharp firefighting).
Come here and post often, you will find a LOT of support on SR.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: AZ
Posts: 195
Welcome!
I only know of one safe way to alleviate those withdrawal symptoms, and that is seeking medical attention.
I drank through the symptoms for months on end and it just got worse and worse. I wouldn't play around with the possibility of delirium tremens. I think a fairly low percentage of alcoholics get them, but not worth finding out on your own in my opinion.
I only know of one safe way to alleviate those withdrawal symptoms, and that is seeking medical attention.
I drank through the symptoms for months on end and it just got worse and worse. I wouldn't play around with the possibility of delirium tremens. I think a fairly low percentage of alcoholics get them, but not worth finding out on your own in my opinion.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: America
Posts: 4,136
I am a point now where I finally sleeping well without too much help of sleep meds or anything. I don't if this is just my brain getting better or getting myself into a better head space by the time I go to bed. A long hot shower or bath or hot tub are awesome ways to not only relax you and your body for sleep to also feel nice and clean. I like to go to the health food store and just shop around for good ideas. I treat myself to a trip to the health food store every now and then and that makes me feel good/better. Don't feel tempted anymore by the wine section either. Used to enjoy a good pared with food. Don't need it, never really needed it; just thought I did or though I wanted it. I don't want it anymore and feel so much better without it. Exercise is so The sweating is to be expected and when you do that just tell yourself it's your bodies way of getting rid of toxins so that's helping you be clean on the inside. I drink a LOT of good fluids and tell myself it's good healthy and replacing alcohol in a good way...You can do this....it's rough at first, but pays TOTALLY pays off!!
You can have reasons, or you can have results, but you can't have both.
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Syracuse, NY
Posts: 1,232
Hi, 'Ric! Nice to meet you! So, do you think you should talk with your doc about quitting? I suffered a seizure, so I can testify they are real, and very dangerous! Docs are bound to confidentiality, and they know how common this affliction is so please don't let embarrassment stop you if you find you're having a lot of withdrawal symptoms.
Is it too prying for me to ask how much you were drinking? I'm female and I was consuming about 12 units a day of both wine and vodka, so I definitely needed medical help on my detox.
Once you're through with detox, be sure to make a plan! It's too easy to relapse without one.
You'll find life starts to improve quickly once the booze is out of your system. Check in here frequently -- the support is so great. I really look forward to hearing more of your story as it unfolds.
Is it too prying for me to ask how much you were drinking? I'm female and I was consuming about 12 units a day of both wine and vodka, so I definitely needed medical help on my detox.
Once you're through with detox, be sure to make a plan! It's too easy to relapse without one.
You'll find life starts to improve quickly once the booze is out of your system. Check in here frequently -- the support is so great. I really look forward to hearing more of your story as it unfolds.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 12
Originally Posted by SoberinSyracuse 
Hi, 'Ric! Nice to meet you! So, do you think you should talk with your doc about quitting? I suffered a seizure, so I can testify they are real, and very dangerous! Docs are bound to confidentiality, and they know how common this affliction is so please don't let embarrassment stop you if you find you're having a lot of withdrawal symptoms.
Is it too prying for me to ask how much you were drinking? I'm female and I was consuming about 12 units a day of both wine and vodka, so I definitely needed medical help on my detox.
Once you're through with detox, be sure to make a plan! It's too easy to relapse without one.
You'll find life starts to improve quickly once the booze is out of your system. Check in here frequently -- the support is so great. I really look forward to hearing more of your story as it unfolds.
Is it too prying for me to ask how much you were drinking? I'm female and I was consuming about 12 units a day of both wine and vodka, so I definitely needed medical help on my detox.
Once you're through with detox, be sure to make a plan! It's too easy to relapse without one.
You'll find life starts to improve quickly once the booze is out of your system. Check in here frequently -- the support is so great. I really look forward to hearing more of your story as it unfolds.
On the bright side, I got in touch with an odd friend of mine yesterday. She went through the hell of crack addiction recovery, and she is still in touch with folks specializing in detox/rehab.. She gave me a phone number to a -not so local- detox center.. I got to drop them a line today .. Apparently they are hard people to reach but maybe if I try hard enough I'll slip through the cracks... Anyhow, back to sipping coffee and attending breakfast for the little ones.. I will keep you posted as the story unfolds.
Thank you
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 12
By the way... The better part of you people mention I should probably check in with a general practician. Would be a great idea and starting point and I agree with it completely. But, as nice as the canadian healthcare system may seem to be, it also has a major flaw: It's overcrowded. Having access to a proper practician In reasonable time frame is nigh impossible. And the process to actually get to the right department feels like being waterboarded with molasses. So unless your missing an arm and bleeding to death, you actually have to go through some extent of trouble or maybe even lie about your condition for them to bat an eye at you.. So not-so-visible illnesses like Parkinson's, Fibromyalgia, depression even addiction are clients that wait a long time to get treatment. Such is our healthcare system: one long stupid bandwagon of administration folks and very little actual healthcare practitioners.
You can have reasons, or you can have results, but you can't have both.
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Syracuse, NY
Posts: 1,232
I hear 'ya. How quickly would you get an appointment with a doctor if you complained of heart palpitations, dizziness, and blurred vision without mentioning alcohol? Even here in the US, I learned I had to play the system. Say the word "alcohol" and you're last in line. Say the word "heart" or "chest" and you're in front. Then once in front of the doc, you can spill the beans.
Most definitely pursue the non-local treatment program. A lot of us resist going into treatment, because it "interrupts" life. Well...alcohol is interrupting life and has a much worse prognosis. I wish I'd done treatment right away instead of resisting it. It was a Godsend.
Once you're dried out and feeling better, sounds like you'll still have some peer pressure and old habits that need to be handled. Most of us have things like this -- people, places, and things that need to be managed or avoided.
Most definitely pursue the non-local treatment program. A lot of us resist going into treatment, because it "interrupts" life. Well...alcohol is interrupting life and has a much worse prognosis. I wish I'd done treatment right away instead of resisting it. It was a Godsend.
Once you're dried out and feeling better, sounds like you'll still have some peer pressure and old habits that need to be handled. Most of us have things like this -- people, places, and things that need to be managed or avoided.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 12
Agreed. The road ahead is a bumpy one. But the payout might just be worth the struggle. I will start by trying to manage short-term issues. One of witch is not being physically able to stop drinking. I will most likely follow up with AA..
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