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Time flies. One full week already.

Old 01-23-2016, 01:51 AM
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Time flies. One full week already.

Today I'm one week sober. That went by so fast!

And it's going well. Last night I was lying in bed and remembered something Dee said. I was talking about never drinking again and he mentioned that he sees it as accepting.

So I just accepted that I can never drink even just one sip ever again for the rest of my life. And you know what? That's very liberating.

Also, there are worse things. You can't drink. So what?

So I saw myself in all sorts of situations where I would usually drink and in my imagination, I acknowledged the alcohol, but was ok about it. I didn't pay much attention to it much further because it's just not something I do.

That was so freeing. No need to think about it, just living life, doing the things that I do want to have as a part of it. I can see this accepting realization being useful in other situations as well.

So, doing great here. Hope you all are as well!
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Old 01-23-2016, 02:13 AM
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That's great Mike. Totally agree. It's so much easier not to drink when you don't have to worry about it even being an option. That was my turning point too.
Keep it up.
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Old 01-23-2016, 02:18 AM
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Smile

Once I found the acceptance it became a whole lot easier. It's not feeling robbed or cheated anymore because I can't drink. Why can't I drink like everyone else. Just got to get better at reigning it in, it's willpower, etc. It's not like that today I have found acceptance. I can't drink. Bingo! Hopefully it stays. I am a very slow learner. OK though.
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Old 01-23-2016, 03:16 AM
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Congrats Mike

D
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Old 01-23-2016, 03:36 AM
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Great to hear Mike!
I agree there are much worse things than not being able to drink again!
Have a nice sober weekend!
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Old 01-23-2016, 03:41 AM
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Good job, Mike!
Amazing what a difference a week can make, particularly with that shift in perspective.

Carry on.
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Old 01-23-2016, 05:40 AM
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So I just accepted that I can never drink even just one sip ever again for the rest of my life. And you know what? That's very liberating.

Good for you.

But the rest of your life is (hopefully) a long time. I've found it better to take things in smaller chunks of time, and just let the time build up. The "one day at a time" notion from AA works well.
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Old 01-23-2016, 05:43 AM
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Great post Mike, once we take it off the table it all gets easier. At least it did for me.

And there are worse things.

This is why I am not so into the one day at a time thing -- my AV deals better with never.

But to each their own. Congrats.
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Old 01-23-2016, 05:44 AM
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Good for you, Mike!

Acceptance was key for me, it was also liberating.

Keep up the great work.
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Old 01-23-2016, 06:03 AM
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Congrats on the first of many sober weeks!
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Old 01-23-2016, 06:06 AM
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I am embarrassed. Ashamed. Scared of your judgement. My post was so full of optimism and I was really feeling those things.

I'm drinking again. Out of nowhere. A switch flipped and I just couldn't stop wanting it. I tried everything to think myself out of it. Force myself through it. But in the back of my mind I knew I was going to do it.

Today I'm back home and no longer at my parents. And I fell back into the old pattern. My place, my routines, those are the triggers.

I am so sorry. I let you all down. I feel like a fraud. A fake. But at the same time I couldn't not write this. One thing I want to be is honest about my addiction to you guys. Always.

So with great difficulty I'm writing this, dreading the responses.

Off to delete my sober date from my profile...
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Old 01-23-2016, 06:11 AM
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Hey, Mike, it happens. Probably most of us have made many starts and restarts, me included.

I'm glad that you were able to break free for a week! That's a whole week when you were not polluting or harming yourself with alcohol.

But alcohol IS an addictive poison that degrades your mind, health, emotions, etc. -- all the more reason to keep trying to break free of it.

Please don't beat yourself up over this -- it's counterproductive. Better to have an optimistic attitude and add more strategies to get free of the snares of addiction.

Still wishing you the best!
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Old 01-23-2016, 06:19 AM
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Mike, it happens. I remember having over 7 months and thinking I was completely free of ever drinking again and then BAM! That switch flipped and my AV caught me off guard. It's been a battle since but each time I get back at it and try again. This time for me I have consequences other than my health at stake so I'm really working it. But it took me a few false starts to get here.

Stop drinking right now before it turns into a full blown relapse / bender, take a deep breath and get day 1 behind you again. Go over what happened this time to cause you to slip and adjust your plan accordingly. Turn this into a learning lesson and not something you beat yourself up with. It's a bump in the road but you can do this!
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Old 01-23-2016, 06:19 AM
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Hi Mike,

Not sure which time zone you are in, but it is probably still morning, or early afternoon. You can pour out the rest of the alcohol and reset and start over. Your post earlier was so positive, and you were feeling really good about being sober, think about that as you pour out the alcohol.

Also, you mentioned you just returned from your parents. I am not sure what supports you had in place there, but they seemed to be working. Think about what was there, and replicate them at your house.

You still have plenty of time to stop drinking, sober up, and enjoy the rest of the weekend.
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Old 01-23-2016, 06:23 AM
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Also, you did one of the best things you could have done by posting on here when you drank. This way we can be here for you and it will keep you from hiding away in your own shame. Let us help you get back on track so you can stop drinking now. Keep your head up and keep working at it and you will make it!
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Old 01-23-2016, 06:38 AM
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The important thing is to learn somthing from it for the next time that craving comes back. We are here for support not judgment
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Old 01-23-2016, 07:09 AM
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Congrats Mike
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Old 01-23-2016, 07:09 AM
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Hey Mike. So what's the current situation? Do you still have booze around and are you still drinking? If so, dump that stuff and start posting if you can. I remember dumping most of a half gallon bottle of vodka down the drain last Sunday morning as soon as I woke up and it was liberating.
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Old 01-23-2016, 07:16 AM
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Originally Posted by ZeldaFan View Post
Hey Mike. So what's the current situation? Do you still have booze around and are you still drinking? If so, dump that stuff and start posting if you can. I remember dumping most of a half gallon bottle of vodka down the drain last Sunday morning as soon as I woke up and it was liberating.
I'm still drinking. I want to be able to stop right now. But I can't. That's always the pattern with me. Drink all I have or until I go to bed and THEN I can let go of it. It's compulsive. I want to stop drinking right now, but the obsession to finish the pattern for the day is too heavy to overcome.
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Old 01-23-2016, 07:26 AM
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Mike,

I've been there. I know about patterns. They feel unbreakable and like you have to play them out until the end because that's just the way things go, the way things always go. Until they don't.

Think about it. It would not take tremendous effort to pour the rest out and then go back to bed. Your addiction doesn't want to do that, but I'll bet the Real Mike thinks that's a pretty good idea. It can be done in less than ten seconds. Do it. I dare you if that helps any.

By any means, please let go of the shame. You have a problem, you acknowledge it and you know something needs to change. This is all good stuff. Not to mention that you are the person who has that power to take just ONE step today to restart that change.

C'mon. Do it now.
I'm rooting for you.
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