FreeOwl

But sober!!!



Yeah, the whole house is ill. I'm fighting it off but it's got me feeling low. I'm still addicted to caffeine and have determined it's going to have to go because I am simply unable to moderate reliably..... yet I'm not there yet because life is so darn demanding that it seems I can't manage without it.

Work is picking up in the new year again and stressing me out. My Lady is still struggling hard with depression and anxiety and not yet ready to commit to medication as an option. School has re-started for her and it's got her in a state.

The kids are having a hard time getting along, because they feel like crap. The teenager has mid-terms... he's not prepared for them. The puppy has chewed up the charger to my phone and to my SAD light.....

Life keeps throwing stuff at us, you see. It doesn't just turn into rainbows and unicorns and all get better all the time.

But it's still better.

I'm so glad that these circumstances aren't an excuse for me to get blotto on vodka. I'm so grateful to be present and to confront all that's on my plate with awareness, consciousness and the ability to be here for my family and to learn and grow from the challenges.

I'm so thankful not to wake to a pounding headache and nausea. I think back to hundreds upon hundreds of mornings waking to the horrible darkness of self-loathing, shame, and soul-shaking, self-imposed illness.

Life's not easy right now..... but it's good.

Thanks for listening.

loulou1981

Oh no, when it rains it pours!!!! Hope u keep fighting it off. Like u said, thank god ur not waking up to the horrifc symptoms of booze!!!😩😩😩

FreeOwl

thanks loulou.

Anna

Oh gosh, FreeOwl, I hope you feel better soon. It sounds like a lot going on, but good to know you're keeping a positive spirit.

Fluffer

Hey,

At least your kids didn't just come with head lice -- again.

Feel better Free Owl!

IfYouCanDream

Keep talking and getting it all out.
It's inspiring to see you go through tough times sober. Thank you for sharing!