Day 1 and Beyond
Day 1 and Beyond
Something in my life has to change and I want the change now.
There is a piece of me that does not want to give up alcohol, as I tend to romanticize it. I know very well that there is nothing romantic about being a drunk.
But still, my mind wanders to a glass of chardonnay while having a romantic dinner. But, we all know its not one glass and that all that wine is, is literally poison. The actual outcome for me is that my husband gets pissed and annoyed with his drunk wife as she has now ruined the evening for him, even if it is just one glass, at least at the table anyway.
I have done this before so I know that I can do it, but I keep stumbling backwards farther and farther into this disease. I think part of my issue is that I am not holding myself accountable and am not telling others about my decision to quit. Telling others to me is another way to help keep oneself accountable. My AV is in complete control right now.
I came in an hour late to work today because of this disease and my poor decisions. I use to be a star worker and now I'm just messing everything up.
I'd like to try and keep this as an accountability log because I need to be sober in order to be happy.
Thanks for reading everyone and being patient with me.. I know I am on here on and off constantly.
There is a piece of me that does not want to give up alcohol, as I tend to romanticize it. I know very well that there is nothing romantic about being a drunk.
But still, my mind wanders to a glass of chardonnay while having a romantic dinner. But, we all know its not one glass and that all that wine is, is literally poison. The actual outcome for me is that my husband gets pissed and annoyed with his drunk wife as she has now ruined the evening for him, even if it is just one glass, at least at the table anyway.
I have done this before so I know that I can do it, but I keep stumbling backwards farther and farther into this disease. I think part of my issue is that I am not holding myself accountable and am not telling others about my decision to quit. Telling others to me is another way to help keep oneself accountable. My AV is in complete control right now.
I came in an hour late to work today because of this disease and my poor decisions. I use to be a star worker and now I'm just messing everything up.
I'd like to try and keep this as an accountability log because I need to be sober in order to be happy.
Thanks for reading everyone and being patient with me.. I know I am on here on and off constantly.
Formerly ScrewdUpInDe
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: In the Nightmare in my head
Posts: 5,329
Keep trying Newhope.
Telling others should be helpful if they care about you and support you bettering yourself.
Keep vigilant and remember that you may need to keep tweaking your plans.
Best wishes.
Telling others should be helpful if they care about you and support you bettering yourself.
Keep vigilant and remember that you may need to keep tweaking your plans.
Best wishes.
As of right now, I am going to put more focus into my health and getting back into shape. I use to be a long distance runner but alcohol and smoking got in the way.
I recently set up my workout room and am quitting smoking. If I can't smoke, I won't drink. Besides, I don't want to be a wrinkly old bag before I am 40.
I am also not keeping any alcohol in the house anymore, I use to be able to ignore it but now its all I can think about at work. So, I'm dumping the booze. In order to make sure I don't pick any up on the way home I am leaving my cash at home and plan to drive a different route home from work.
I recently set up my workout room and am quitting smoking. If I can't smoke, I won't drink. Besides, I don't want to be a wrinkly old bag before I am 40.
I am also not keeping any alcohol in the house anymore, I use to be able to ignore it but now its all I can think about at work. So, I'm dumping the booze. In order to make sure I don't pick any up on the way home I am leaving my cash at home and plan to drive a different route home from work.
Good to see you, newhope.
That was the hardest thing for me to accept - there would never be just one. Took me many years to finally admit that trying to use willpower was futile.
You can get free.
That was the hardest thing for me to accept - there would never be just one. Took me many years to finally admit that trying to use willpower was futile.
You can get free.
I have romanticized wine as well, however, it is not a happy love story when I feel like crap the next day. I am finishing up Day 12 today after many slip ups. I am determined to stick with it, and SR is a great place to keep accountable!!
Glad you are here.;-)
Glad you are here.;-)
Nothing romantic about wine. When I think about romance and wine I think about the movie Days of Wine and Roses. Chronicling a couple's descent into alcoholic madness.
Keep working on a plan. Fine tune it as you go along. But whatever it is, don't drink, no matter what. It offers nothing but pain.
Keep working on a plan. Fine tune it as you go along. But whatever it is, don't drink, no matter what. It offers nothing but pain.
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