On The Road

I've had some sober time under my belt which has provided me the opportunity to reflect about the fear of quitting drinking. Initially, I thought I was afraid of dealing with anxiety. And while this was true, I never really considered its root cause because I spent so much energy numbing my brain. But why?

Now, with a clear head, I've come to realize that I was truly afraid of having to see myself for who I really was: a self-loathing liar (to myself and family). Ouch.

And there, in full light, for everyone to see - that's why I spent years drinking myself into oblivion. I didn't like ME.

So the good news is that I'm working really hard to fix this. And over time, things are getting better. Much better with sobriety.

So I'm curious about YOU - what are/were your fears about getting sober?

Jsbodhi

I was more afraid that I couldn't get off the wine, rather than actual fears about being sober.
I was more afraid that I was doomed.
Xoxo
And I was wondering how I would learn to tell myself no, I'm not the best at that- getting better though!
Xoxo
This is a good thread

Steely

Fear of being me and finding me On The Road.

JohnQPublic

I was in a series of bad accidents that broke my body and spirit. That's when I really crawled inside a bottle and decided not to come out. I have PTSD as a result and although I am sober I fear what another accident may do to me and my recovery. Thanks for the thought. John

keeppushing

I think I'm broken and as a result can't cope with anything which then makes me feel overwhelmed. Any emotion is over-amplified and triggers. When I stay at home for a couple of weeks I can stay sober no problem. One visit out to run an errand or see a client and I relapse hard.

KP

Sebastian84

I'm anxious about the responsibilities and finishing with the procrastination when it comes to life. Hiding in the bottle alleviates those anxieties, temporarily, but those responsibilities will still be waiting once the come down passes.

In addition, I fear how I will be socially. With a few drinks under the belt, I'm quite outgoing, charming and witty. Without those few drinks, it's almost as if my brain freezes and none of the usual smooth talking comes - my brain freezes.

I've read that these fears are unfounded and that life improves immeasurably once you put the bottle down. I really hope so.