Liveitwell

Don't know if y'all are following this story out if Texas (the national news did pick it up originally in 2013) but it's fascinating to me. The most recent revelation is how his mother "adultified" her son at a young age by exposing him to adult situayions/issues and using him as her protector. Gee-no ****! So this guys mom is totally crazy dysfunctional and uses her little boy for her own needs and creates a monster that feels like he can do whatever he wants and does not have to follow rules or be held accountable for his action? A mom with total disregard for the law herself? Oh hell-short of the drunk driving charge I feel like this story is written about my ex husband and his mommy.

Seriously! I'm realizing it's more common than you think that a mom uses her son. It's obvious this lady needed friends but decided to use her son and let him do whatever he wabted so she would have his love and loyalty bc her marriage was crumbling-again, sounds like my ex and his childhood!! My ex even discussed how his mom basically emotionally raped him growing up and treated him like an adult and that's why he is the way he is. Again-no ****! In the latest chapter in this news saga Ethan's momma just keeps enabling and justifying, lying and excusing his bad behavior and breaking the law (and helped him break the law!). Gosh again-sounds just like someone else i used to call my MIL (and SIL too). The whole apple and tree thing

This stuff really irritates me-these "moms"/women are creating little monsters....because they can't take care of themselves and they are too worried about being liked than being a parent....please let's all create a healthy environment for our kids with limits, rules, boundaries and humility to express remorse when choosing an action that hurts another.

Anyway, if you want to read about some pretty messed up family dynamics, arrogance, addict mentality, mommy issues and enabling, and a horribly botched case of drunk driving that killed four people, check out the Ethan couch story-and his mommy. Holy crap. It's a freak show that is so incredibly sad.

Refiner

Yes, I have followed it. I hope she gets no less than a DECADE behind bars that entitled wretch that spawns entitled little BRAT HEATHENs that KILL people and show absolutely ZERO remorse or respect! I hope he gets life!

HHTexas

Yup.. I live not far away. That story is soooo screwed up!!

Wisconsin

This case is so insane, and a true testament to the power of money and fancy schmancy lawyers. If this kid had not been rich, and had a public defender, he would have been tried as an adult and served a looooong sentence.

There are a lot of misconceptions about what can happen next. Many people assume that because he was sentenced to 10 years of probation that he can be sent to jail for 10 years if he violated that probation. Alas, this is not the case.

His case was tried in JUVENILE court. If his case remains in the juvenile system, the maximum amount of time he will spend in juvenile prison is until April 11, 2016, which is when he turns 19. Once he turns 19, the juvenile system cannot incarcerate him any longer.

Prosecutors are petitioning to have his case moved to standard adult justice system. However, even if that petition is granted, he STILL won't spend a lot of time in prison as a result of his original conviction. The most a judge can do in the adult system regarding his original conviction is send him to adult jail for up to 120 days and add up to 8 more years to his probation. Only if he violates probation AGAIN, once he has been moved to the adult justice system, will he have the potential to serve significant jail time for his original crime. This all assumes, of course, that Mexico finally deports him. He is fighting deportation and is apparently alleging (or going to allege) human rights violations to fight deportation further.

His mother has been charged with hindering apprehension, which is a felony and punishable by up to 10 years in prison.

Liveitwell

I hope his mother gets all ten years. Seems like that would be punishment enough for this duo of goodness-just making them spend time apart for years would be the best thing!

LexieCat

I think there are good reasons for treating juveniles as juveniles. As tragic as the loss of life was, any one of us could have a teenager who did something horribly irresponsible like driving drunk. I certainly did, not that I'm proud of it or excusing it.

If his case had been handled appropriately from the beginning, I would have had no issue with his receiving a less onerous sentence, as a juvenile, than an adult would receive. But the thing is, his affluence was used as an excuse to virtually absolve him from ANY accountability for his actions--and his behavior while on probation--forget for the moment about fleeing the country--indicates a need to treat any additional violations of the law more seriously.

I don't blame the parents for trying to keep him out of prison--I think parents do that, even those who are disturbed by what their child did. I DO blame the mom for taking him out of the country--and, if she did raise him the way you describe, she probably did help to create a very screwed-up human being.

I'm a big Game of Thrones fan--Cersei and Joffrey, anyone?

Lyssy

I have been following the case. I have a few choice words for "her and her son" - lol, but I won't share them here on a public forum.

I think the judge needs to be in the cell in between them both for the next 20 years.

Here is the latest...

'Affluenza' teen's mom complains about jail conditions

Liveitwell

Lexie-during their divorce proceeding the social worker had many things to say about the mom and her treatment of her son-such as the things I wrote above. Those came from his own stories and admissions when he was a younger kid. I feel bad for him only bc his parents failed him. This is much more than your average parent that doesn't want to see the bad in her son-this is crazy land and coddling and enabling-and the mom is doing a lot of it!

LexieCat

*snort*

Orange is the new black, hasn't she heard?

HHTexas

Omg... game of thrones.. yes!

redatlanta

They both make me sick.

Lilro

I have also been following the story from the beginning. Nancy Grace has had a segment on this nightly for the last week..along with that case from Netflix, making a murderer..another interesting case.
As the mother of a teenage boy I am appalled by the actions of that mother. I have always told my son " unless you've got money for an attorney I suggest you don't get yourself into any trouble because I WILL NOT help you out of the situation ". Thank god he's not the type ( granted he's almost 17 so it still remains to be seen but so far so good ) but I stand by what I say and he knows it.
That mother has raised a little monster.... Curious to see what future shenanigans, and there will be more, this kid gets into.. Talk about enabling!! Affluenza my ass!

KidsR#1

When my AH brought this up last week, before I knew he was drinking that day, he asked what I thought. I told him the mom was wrong and AH didn't see it that way. He was like, but it's her son! She shouldn't get in trouble for trying to help him.

Yup, should have been a red flag to me before I left that day.

Liveitwell

^ yep. Your decision-your consequence.

Liveitwell

Kids-yep!!!! Red flag times a million! Makes me wonder just how many of our A's have totally dysfunctional enabling mothers! Seems like a pattern at least... Just my two cents. I offer to help someone that is trying to help themself-that's help. Enabling is totally different and is taking care of someone else's business and not letting them feel the consequences of their own actions. She's a classic!

LexieCat

Aw, c'mon. I don't think you can assume parents--moms in particular--are at fault when people become alcoholics. Yes, sometimes that's true. But I've worked in the criminal justice system for a LONG time, and I've seen plenty of defendants who have done hideous things, whose parents did the very best they could (and were not by any stretch whack jobs), and people who grew up to be decent human beings in spite of alcoholism, addiction, and abuse in their childhoods. Any of those things increases the risk, but I think it's very dangerous to assume that self-centered alcoholics had mothers who inappropriately indulged them. Alcoholism is very complicated, and the disease itself tends to make alcoholics self-centered and grandiose.

suki44883

I don't necessarily think the Mom is at fault for her son being an alcoholic. That is something no one else can cause. But, she IS responsible for raising him without boundaries or discipline...possibly the Dad, too, but the Mom is the one who shuttled him and herself off to Mexico in an attempt to shield him (again) from consequences of his actions. I have zero sympathy for either of them.

Liveitwell

^ agreed-that is what I meant-it's not her fault he's an alcoholic. It is her fault for shielding him from responsibility and raising him to feel like he can do whatever he wants without consequence. Absolutely. Lex-no, in no way was I saying the mom is at fault for her soms alcoholism-she is at fault for continuing to enable him and help him escape the consequences of his actions. I highly doubt that when the video surfaced in November of him drinking with friends at a party that was his first time drinking-she knew it was a condition of his parole-that's all I'm saying. Her continued enabling is detrimental to her son, as documented in this story. I have no sympathy for her.

CatHair

Read more about the whole screwed-up family in this well-done article.

http://www.dmagazine.com/publication...couch?single=1

LexieCat

In THIS CASE, I think it's certainly likely she helped shaped what her son has become. I'm just saying it's a bit reckless to assume that everyone who is evil or screwed up must have had parents who sucked at parenting.

My dispute isn't about THIS situation, it's the broad-based generalization I'd dispute.