trying2change83

I just started my third day without drinking. It's 7:30 am and normally on Sunday's I would be on my 2nd or 3rd beer by now. I've always looked forward to Sunday's so I could drink a lot of beer and watch football. I don't have the shakes as bad today as yesterday and I'm less cloudy. My wife noticed I didn't drink yesterday and thought it was odd considering we hosted a family get together. I have not told her or anyone else that I'm making a conscious effort to stop drinking because after my Christmas Eve alcohol fueled temper tantrum, I convinced her it had nothing to do with alcohol. I cannot find it in me to confess to her that I have a problem, even though I'm sure she and everyone else knows. Foolish pride I guess. My goal is to get through today without drinking. I know I have a problem. I've ruined countless relationships and things because of my problem. Am I wrong for not admitting it to people even though I know I have a problem?

CharlesG

I admire your will and strength trying2change83, your not trying to change you ARE changing! Love yourself.

Cleomie

One of my favorite phrases I hear on my recovery journey are the words "rigorous honesty". We've got to brutally honest with ourselves and ultimately with those we love about our alcoholism. It really is liberating, Tryingtochange. Take the plunge with this first step. And good luck. I'm praying for you to have the strength to do this.

least

You don't have to tell anyone you quit drinking, but I'm sure they'll notice that you're not drinking anymore.

Stay strong. Getting sober is rough at first but the rewards are worth it.

On The Road

Trying2change. Don't worry about telling anybody anything right now if you're not comfortable doing so. The most important thing you can do is stay sober. Know that you'll probably be cranky and tired and a bit anxious. This is all perfectly normal. Try doing some physical activity (gym, bike, jog, walk, yoga, whatever) to calm your nerves, and go to bed early. Your body and mind need to recover from the effects of alcohol. Your spirit will have time to recoup later. Hang in there!

Rickh54

Congrats on recognizing your issues and taking the first step to a better life.
My opinion differs from some of the other responders. When I quit drinking, I was firstly honest with my self. Secondly, I was honest with my wife. She has been in my corner for 34 years and is my best friend.. How could I be successful at sobriety if she wasn't with me all the way? I couldn't. Then I had a chat with my three adult kids. They also have been a great source of encouragement and support.
This recovery journey is not a solo trip. You will need the love, support and understanding of those around you. Why not seek that from your life partner first and foremost.
Best wishes
Rick

SunnyDenver

I'm on Day 3 myself, hang in there. I've decided to go to an AA meeting today, my first in this round of my journey. Whatever you think about AA, to me the beauty of the meetings is the fellowship. It's a place to be brutally honest about what you're doing and feeling. And as much as I love this board I also think person to person sharing is really powerful. So, even if you're not ready to talk with your partner, perhaps sharing anonymously will help.

sleepie

Hi Trying, congrats on a great decision.
Good to hear you are abstaining today and way to go on day 3!
Keep posting, you will make it through these hurdles, holidays and football days It CAN be done!

PurpleKnight

You can do this Trying!! Stay close to SR for support, we're in your corner!!

kittycat3

You can keep it simple: I'm not drinking today. That's it, no need to admit anything like you have a problem or you are never drinking again, etc. congrats on a sober life ahead!

secretchord

one day and sometimes one minute at a time. You can do this. Go to bed sober tonight. Don't worry about tomorrow.

rahrah

For me...I could never stay sober because I lied about WHY I was getting sober.
I NEVER admitted it was due to my more than obvious problem...I always said it was for this reason or that reason.
The problem FOR ME was that lying to others meant lying to myself as well...and that always lead me back to the drink every time!
So after trying everything else these past 30 yrs, I am desperate
enough to do whatever it takes...even if it's swallowing what's left of my pride and admitting that Yes, I am quitting because I have a problem with alcohol....(which of coarse everyone already knows).
I'm simply ready to do whatever it takes.

bigsombrero

Great job!

It's too early to bombard you with recommendations and philosophies. Keep it simple: don't drink now. Don't drink in 10 minutes. Don't drink tonight. Go to bed sober. That's all you gotta do right now.

Moving forward, it sounds like you're willing to accept some accountability at some point. Staying accountable to yourself is your best weapon. But it might not hurt to have someone there to encourage you and keep your spirits up when you're frustrated - and it might help to establish some communication with your wife so she'll understand WHY you are frustrated. Might make your journey smoother if you open up to her. Many of us don't want to "cross that line" because now it means you're seriously on the hook. You gotta be ready to commit to sobriety, though, if you want to succeed.

One minute at a time tonight, tomorrow, and this week. Keep it up and good luck!

Lorax1981

Just stay sober, that's all you gotta worry about. You can do it!

Soberwolf

Your doing good on day 3 keep on pushing through no matter what don't drink reach out every time you have a craving or you hear your AV