What is wrong with me?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 89
What is wrong with me?
Why guys...don't want sympathy just wanted to rant! I drank tonight...I feel disgusting for it! Did the whole oh it's only one etc....my counsellor has gone on Xmas break (not blaming that) im such a joke....just feel like giving up now...I can't do it...just wish I could...I WANT too...ok so angry at myself. You don't need to reply I just needed to type
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,385
Hi Lennox
SR is the kind of place that even when you feel you don;t deserve replies, you get them anyway
Try not to let this plunge you into too much despair or beating yourself up.
This is one skirmish not the whole war.
You've shown that you can be sober - now you need to work on the permanency.
Look at your recovery plan again. Can you add to it?
Maybe you can widen your support network a little? Post more maybe?
Maybe even consider some face to face meeting based support like AA or SMART or LifeRing?
why not join the Class of December support thread?
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...pt-2-a-14.html
You absolutely can do this - no doubt in my mind
D
SR is the kind of place that even when you feel you don;t deserve replies, you get them anyway
Try not to let this plunge you into too much despair or beating yourself up.
This is one skirmish not the whole war.
You've shown that you can be sober - now you need to work on the permanency.
Look at your recovery plan again. Can you add to it?
Maybe you can widen your support network a little? Post more maybe?
Maybe even consider some face to face meeting based support like AA or SMART or LifeRing?
why not join the Class of December support thread?
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...pt-2-a-14.html
You absolutely can do this - no doubt in my mind
D
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Australia
Posts: 323
Lennox I know ive been feeling like that many, many times. You're not a joke and please don't give up, just don't let the alcohol keep winning. Get back on the sober wagon and have a look at your recovery plan.
You don't have to keep going through this, hopefully you can learn from this lapse and don't let it turn into a full relapse.
Good luck mate, keep seeking support
You don't have to keep going through this, hopefully you can learn from this lapse and don't let it turn into a full relapse.
Good luck mate, keep seeking support
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 89
I just feel so disappointed....thank you everyone for being so kind. I have not drank for four hours...have had water but just don't want to sleep as so ashamed. I really hate this disease...please can someone invent a cure!!!!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: FLAAADAH
Posts: 793
Type away Lennox ! We have all been there. We have all felt the guilt, the shame and the remorse that you are feeling...not to mention the hangover to come in the morning.
Look ahead and "Play the Tape" when you want to drink again.
In the meantime...keep typing. We're listening.
DD
Look ahead and "Play the Tape" when you want to drink again.
In the meantime...keep typing. We're listening.
DD
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 89
I feel like absolute shite (sorry for the language) but I do. I hate myself right now...I haven't even done anything bad tonight but just feel terrible! I want to cry but can't as so dehydrated....everyone who reads this as newcomers and struggling please see this is the result...hope it helps someone out there reading
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Indiana
Posts: 1,472
Hi Lennox. I'm glad you came here to share how you are feeling. I'm sorry you feel so terrible right now. I was where you are last Saturday. I was coming off of days and days of heavy drinking and I felt like there was no hope that day and that night. I wanted to give up as well. When I woke up Sunday, I poured the rest of my booze down the drain and started again with a new resolve. I'm now a week sober. I know right now it seems hopeless but once you get some rest come back, post your day 1 post and resolve to stay sober for that one day at least. You will get tons of support here to help you along the way. I know I sure have over the past two years! Big hug for you in your time of need.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Auckland, New Zealand
Posts: 165
Don't worry Lennox - just learn to not go for the first drink - I come undone there too. Try and try again AND be kind to yourself!!! Scolding and criticism will not help you get to where you want to be; love is the cure <3
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 89
Originally Posted by ZeldaFan 
Hi Lennox. I'm glad you came here to share how you are feeling. I'm sorry you feel so terrible right now. I was where you are last Saturday. I was coming off of days and days of heavy drinking and I felt like there was no hope that day and that night. I wanted to give up as well. When I woke up Sunday, I poured the rest of my booze down the drain and started again with a new resolve. I'm now a week sober. I know right now it seems hopeless but once you get some rest come back, post your day 1 post and resolve to stay sober for that one day at least. You will get tons of support here to help you along the way. I know I sure have over the past two years! Big hug for you in your time of need.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,385
This is a great link for making a recovery plan
https://store.samhsa.gov/shin/conten...0/SMA-3720.pdf
https://store.samhsa.gov/shin/conten...0/SMA-3720.pdf
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