SorroW22

Hi- Newbie here again. So, I've almost come to terms with my new label " wife of a meth addict". The past 2 weeks have been terrible but my H has finally agreed to inpatient treatment. Given the opportunity to go 4 days ago, he sd no because he wanted to spend Christmas with me and our kids. I disagreed and voiced it to him- in return I got a text saying " .......... U have made my life miserable and unbearable,..... I don't even want to be your friend,....... Move on, ...... I won't come back to you after I'm clean,..... I'm complete without you, ". Yesterday- he lets me know tht he set his day to leave. Keep in mind- I can barely look at him or talk to him after the awful text. Today- he asks me if I would go with him and drop him off. ??????? Something inside me wants to - but I just don't know what to do? Say my goodbye here at home, or take the 3 hour drive with him and say goodbye there???? Also, today I was told he was at a certain persons house. I asked if he had gone he sd no. I asked again- he sd no. I TOLD him he WAS there and he suddenly starts with " are you following me????" " who did you make follow me.". I laughed at this because I've been home all day 7 kids for a sleepover How and why would I be following him? Finally, he had to admit he was there because I told him the EXACT time that he was there. He got so mad that he yells " I can't believe my own wife would BETRAY me like this,". REALLY?????????????? I was in shock at that statement. So again I ask, drive him or not?????

Dee74

If he's not at your house, I don't see any reason to drive him anywhere.

If he comes back,having sent you a text like that, then I'd move on just like he wants, and not drive him to rehab.

Sure the emotional blackmail will come out, and sure he might not even get to rehab just to use you as an excuse not to change, but that's his responsibility, not yours.

If he really wants to change he'll find a way to rehab.
D

SorroW22

It's almost as though he LITERALLY lives in a different world- he evn asked if I did bring him , that maybe we could go the night before and stay at a hotel???????? I mean he hasn't slept here AT HOME WITH ME in 2 1/2 weeks. It's like he has no concept of my feelings. Or does he and he just trying to maintain civil communication in hopes that I will just forget everything and play " happy wife, sad wife , lonely wife"?????????

Carlotta

I would not give a ride to someone who treats me the way he treated you. He's a grown man he can take a cab or the bus and since he is "complete without you" he might as well get used to securing his own means of transportation.

Dee74

I had a look at your other thread too - you're getting the same answers from both sides of the board here, so...let him dangle...he can find his own way to rehab.

D

Berrybean

Urrrrrrrmmmmmm.

I think I'd say, "Sorry, but NO.."

Sounds like you have plenty of other children to look after. Leave him to it and work on your own recovery (i.e. your recovery from this relationship). You deserve better. How do I know that?? Because EVERYONE deserves to be treated better than he is treating you. Maybe once he has worked on his recovery and is ready to conduct himself towards you as a respectful and loving partner, who is ready and willing to make amends (put some effort into making things right), then it's worth giving him some head space. But that might never happen, or it could take a long time. Your responsibility is for yourself and your children. Not for him.

Soberwolf

I'm with Beccy & D let him find his own way