red3215

I was so determined not to drink and four days went by. I was checking in here first thing every morning and every few hours. It really helped. Day 5 I got sidetracked and started forgetting to make fighting alcoholism my number one goal for the year.

Went out with a friend I used to drink with and a beer didn't seem like a big deal again. After our meeting, still buzzing, I bought more alcohol to sleep. Drank a little more to help me sleep in the middle of the night. Drank just a little more before going into work. A small buzz because I hate mornings.

Then disaster began. I left work 3 more times to get a buzz ball on my breaks. Then I left work 45 minutes early, not even telling anyone, and drank one more buzz ball which put me way over the edge for some reason. I was driving DRUNK like I dont think I've ever done before. Buzzed driving plenty but not drunk like this. I got into a car accident which I don't even remember, don't know if I hit anyone else still. The police department gave me a number to call Monday.

I only got in trouble for DWI with open container, so I know there must not have been any injury to another person at least. Shattered my passenger window completely. Jail was not fun. I didn't sleep all night and my anxiety, which is already a problem, was extemely high. I thought my drivers license would be suspended. Well it wasn't. I'm lucky. I'm just getting this off my chest. Seems I really need to be fighting this sickness like crazy, every day with no exception.

Hopefully this will help someone else who might be slipping into nonchalance. I just planned on one beer...

JD

I hope that's the wake up call you need. Sounds like your very lucky only getting the open container.

TroubledJoe

I wrecked my car while drunk too. Thankfully no one injured in that either but what a disaster. Really was my wake up call. Stopped drinking right after that.

...for two weeks. Then carried on drinking for two more years.

Don't make that mistake, let this be your wake up call and make sobriety your number one priority. Come here every day, do whatever you need to do. Just remember how you feel right now, you don't need to feel like this ever again.

Fly N Buy

Ours is a progressive problem , right?

Your thread from 12/28/14

Public Intoxication
Hello everyone. I was doing quite well at 42 days, decided I'd have a little slip and ended up in jail for the first time. I only got Public Intoxication, no DWI, but I was pretty drunk and couldn't wiggle out of this one. I'm looking for a job and already have extra challenges because I have ADD and just make a ton of mistakes at work no matter how hard I try not to.
How bad is this on my record? It's so recent.
Any suggestions for me? Oh I also have horrible credit.

KissMyTiara

My license wasn't suspended until about ten days after my DUI arrest. I got a letter from the DMV. The police don't do it.

Soberwolf

Hi RedLadySlipper take this as a big red flag of things getting worse

What is your current recovery programme/plan

FreeOwl

Been there. Twice.

Nearly three times.

And deserved to be many more times.

I finally got the message and got sober. I'm grateful I never hurt anyone or died.

I hope you don't either, and I hope it only takes you this one to 'get it'.

red3215

Yes I was just reading up more on all this. I could lose my car insurance as well as get my license supsended. I'm already behind on my car two payments and have trouble finding stable work partly due to ADD. I feel like my life is over. I feel sick. My plan is to keep coming to this board daily, often and go to AA at least five times a week. But i just want to lie in bed

Anna

This disease is progressive and this is what's happening to you now. Things will continue to get worse unless you make the decision to stop drinking now. I really hope you're ready for that. Try to not focus on losing your licence and car insurance right now, but just to get through each day without drinking. You can do this!

Thanos

.

Gottalife

Sounds like a good plan to me, but I can also relate to that feeling so flat I just didn't want to get out of bed. Maybe you have some AA contacts you could call. That might give just enough of a lift to make it to the meeting. Or maybe someone will pick you up?

The other thing that comes to mind is that you have learned a few things now. It is part of your own experience. The illness is progressive. It always gets worse never better. You have proved that. And "A beer seemed no big deal" you have learned how at certain times alcoholics of our type have no effective mental defence against the first drink". Now you know what is meant by that.

These are not failures so much as important stepping stones to recovery. You can put this experience to good use. You are in a much better position to recover than you were before.

Dee74

I'm really sorry that happened but I hope you can use this as your turning point RLS

D

PurpleKnight

Go at things again and teak your plan, you can do this!!

atxjoshua

I believe you can look at this like your last DWI, not your first — instead of beating yourself up over it, keep coming here and AA for support and reinforcement.

I know we are all different, but I'd like to offer something that has worked for me when I have fallen very low and not wanted to get out of bed, etc:

- Make yourself get up. It might take a while, but convince yourself that all you have to do is get up.
- Find something simple, like coloring in a coloring book, or solving a crossword, or a word find puzzle, that you can do to immerse your mind and gain some momentum for the day.
- Build up to a new hobby, or revisiting a favorite hobby.
- Do these things anytime you need comfort or distraction.

You can do it. You are loved.

MariahGayle

You will get through whatever consequences come from this RS Lady....just put sobriety first & everything will work out. I've been there...be kind to yourself & just be thankful no one, including yourself was hurt or worse. When I went to court for my DUII, there was 2 people before me being arraigned for manslaughter...drinking & driving.

red3215

Thanks so much everyone. Made me feel a little better. What a horrible condition this is to struggle with.

Venecia

RLS, your signature line gives me pause:

"My sobriety date is December 3. If I slip up and that changes, I'll update. Trying to keep some accountability..."

Are you leaving a crack in the door?

There are resources here on SR to help you. The meetings that take place at 8 p.m. CST on Tuesdays and Fridays have proven valuable for many. The same goes for our monthly classes. They've been instrumental for so many in achieving sobriety. Here's the link to the December class.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...er-2015-a.html

Glad to hear you're going to AA. Stick with it. This can be your turning point.

Selfrespect

Hi, I just wanted to say that I am sorry this happened to you. Also, I have major depression, so even when I wasn't drinking I have had thousands of days when I didn't want to get out of bed. Here is what I tell myself: "All you have to do is get up, make coffee and get in the shower. After that, you can do what you want."

It helps to just get rolling. Once you have showered, you'll want to get dressed, once you have coffee, you'll want to have breakfast, etc. It doesn't work every time, but it has worked many times for me. Sometimes you need not only one day at a time but also one minute, one hour at a time too. Good luck.

doggonecarl

I think my biggest struggle had to do with not accepting I could never drink again. As long as I tried to drink, I struggled. Struggled to control my drinking, stuggled to stay out of trouble, struggled to avoid the consequences of my drinking.

Once I accepted I couldn't drink, sobriety hasn't been nearly the struggle that being an alcoholic was.