cricket123

Thanksgiving was good. I had dinner with my sister. Later when I texted my sister to thank her for dinner she was at the hospital with her husband who had a heart attack. He's at home now doing ok.

Well I told my kids and they were in touch with my brother in law. Sunday they went over there including my ex.

I have to say I'm a bit amazed that the ex would go over there. He always disliked my bil. I guess he gave my bil 2or 3 hugs.

I'm baffled on this. It was nice that they went and visited but wth.

Insights?

Cricket

LexieCat

Two possibilities--one is he doesn't dislike him as much as you thought he did. More likely, maybe, that he's trying to show everyone what a great guy he is.

It really doesn't matter. Your kids got to see their uncle and the visit probably cheered him up.

AnvilheadII

since he took the kids over to see the BIL, what was he supposed to do? sit in the car? try not to READ motives into ALL his actions, most people have compassion for someone who just suffered a heart attack. did you go to see them as well?

cricket123

Our kids all have cars and drivers licenses. So yes I question his motives and I was a bit concerned that the ex showing up would cause bil stress. And no I have not made it over there due to the fact I have been working 12 hrs a day but I have been calling and texting them.

ladyscribbler

Glad to hear your brother in law is doing well. How's your sister holding up? It must be really stressful to have a crisis like this on top of the holiday. Is he back home yet?

dandylion

Cricket.....this is similar to the same KIND of thing...when he showed up in church (if I am remembering. correctly). ....and, he looked "good".......

Your FEELINGS were similar.....

The rest of the world doesn't have the same view of him, as you...because he hasn't lived with them in the same way he has of you......

I know that you would like the "justice" of others seeing him as you do......
And, I know that you have tons of resentment built up over his behaviors to you (with good cause)......
I know that every time he looks good.....it scalds your skin...
I don't think this is unusual as a reaction......but, it something that I think that you will just have to come to accept...

You can't control or even understand every move this guy makes......

Over time....when you have been able to detach from his existence, and, move forward.....these things will bother you less and less.....

About him....even a blind squirrel stumbles over a nut, once in while.....
Even a broken clock is right two times a day......

He is him...and you are you...and you are two entirely separate individulals.....

dandylion