Moving On
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 299
Moving On
Haven't written a post in about a week. Nothing has changed with my ah.
Had a very peaceful weekend, took care of my grandkids, and ah went to see his mother and sister. AH came home on Sunday evening. I had very little interaction with him. My ah was very sick that night, much diarrhea and stomach cramping.
He went to work on Monday. I went to the business later on, stayed about 4 hrs and went home. My ah was actually ok.
I got a call around 5:45, when my ah was expected home. He stated he was waiting for a few pieces of equipment, and would be home shortly. I was shocked my ah called me.
Well 9:30 came and he wasn't home. I called the business and the young man, whose thinks my ah walks on water answered. I asked if I could speak with him. He said NO, your ah has done nothing wrong. I asked nicely to speak with him again. This young man again refused to let me speak with him( this is the young man that was taken via 911 a few weeks ago because he was unresponsive). I then informed him, that I owned half the business, and if he wanted to set foot in the building again, he better give him the phone. Then he gave him the phone.
My ah, was drunk, proceeded to tell me I tried this young man like dirt, and a few other things, and hung up on me.
I went to bed. At around 1:30am, my home phone range once, then stopped. No caller id, since only one ring. I got worried thinking it could be one of my children, so checked my cell phone( I had the ringer off). I saw that my ah had called around the same time.
I'm assuming he called on the house phone.
I know was awake. Around 2:45am, my ah texted me, I am sorry, then a long message that didn't make much sense. I didn't respond.
My ah didn't come home. He texted me again at 8:30am, with I am sorry.
I had my lawyers appt. I am moving on. I'm going to Florida next week for 2 weeks, when I return it will be decided who stays in our home and who goes.
It really doesn't matter if I stay in my house or move.
Over the past few weeks, my ah has been in jail, been out drinking with this young man in our business at least 4 times I know of, and last night didn't come home.
I'm done with the drama and sleepless nights, and am looking for some peace.
I have a lot to be thankful for, and I'm not going to waste the rest of my life like this.
If my ah wants to continue drinking with this arrogant 28 yr old man, all the power to him. My ah has so many wonderful things in his life, but he's choosing to throw it all away for his new mistress(the bottle). I have learned much on this forum, thank you all!!! I can't compete with his addiction.
I have moved on in my head. It's just going to take me about a month to move on physically.
I don't look at it as throwing away 12 years of my life. I learned a lot during Rhodes years!!
MY AH is throwing away the 12 years, and potentially the rest of his life.
Had a very peaceful weekend, took care of my grandkids, and ah went to see his mother and sister. AH came home on Sunday evening. I had very little interaction with him. My ah was very sick that night, much diarrhea and stomach cramping.
He went to work on Monday. I went to the business later on, stayed about 4 hrs and went home. My ah was actually ok.
I got a call around 5:45, when my ah was expected home. He stated he was waiting for a few pieces of equipment, and would be home shortly. I was shocked my ah called me.
Well 9:30 came and he wasn't home. I called the business and the young man, whose thinks my ah walks on water answered. I asked if I could speak with him. He said NO, your ah has done nothing wrong. I asked nicely to speak with him again. This young man again refused to let me speak with him( this is the young man that was taken via 911 a few weeks ago because he was unresponsive). I then informed him, that I owned half the business, and if he wanted to set foot in the building again, he better give him the phone. Then he gave him the phone.
My ah, was drunk, proceeded to tell me I tried this young man like dirt, and a few other things, and hung up on me.
I went to bed. At around 1:30am, my home phone range once, then stopped. No caller id, since only one ring. I got worried thinking it could be one of my children, so checked my cell phone( I had the ringer off). I saw that my ah had called around the same time.
I'm assuming he called on the house phone.
I know was awake. Around 2:45am, my ah texted me, I am sorry, then a long message that didn't make much sense. I didn't respond.
My ah didn't come home. He texted me again at 8:30am, with I am sorry.
I had my lawyers appt. I am moving on. I'm going to Florida next week for 2 weeks, when I return it will be decided who stays in our home and who goes.
It really doesn't matter if I stay in my house or move.
Over the past few weeks, my ah has been in jail, been out drinking with this young man in our business at least 4 times I know of, and last night didn't come home.
I'm done with the drama and sleepless nights, and am looking for some peace.
I have a lot to be thankful for, and I'm not going to waste the rest of my life like this.
If my ah wants to continue drinking with this arrogant 28 yr old man, all the power to him. My ah has so many wonderful things in his life, but he's choosing to throw it all away for his new mistress(the bottle). I have learned much on this forum, thank you all!!! I can't compete with his addiction.
I have moved on in my head. It's just going to take me about a month to move on physically.
I don't look at it as throwing away 12 years of my life. I learned a lot during Rhodes years!!
MY AH is throwing away the 12 years, and potentially the rest of his life.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,699
You sound good in the middle of a crappy situation - logical and level headed. Enjoy your 2 week vacation - that'll be a good time to get everything in place to come home and move swiftly.
The last 12 years (for you) were just a necessary learning process that you needed to get to where you want to go. Enjoy your vacation!!
The last 12 years (for you) were just a necessary learning process that you needed to get to where you want to go. Enjoy your vacation!!
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
I'd put a block on your phone for non-business hours, at least. If he needs something he can call his young man or 911.
The sooner you can get disentangled from this whole toxic situation, the better.
The sooner you can get disentangled from this whole toxic situation, the better.
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