JarredMud

I don't mean to make a new thread but the link led me hear. I haven't gone three days in five years. It's been 3.5 liters a week for ten years, can't believe I'm not already dead. Maybe that was the goal. I honestly want to be free from alcohol. I'm not a social guy and hate social gatherings, so AA hasn't worked for me yet, but I'm ready to change my life, just don't have the willpower.

Venecia

Welcome to SR, Jarred. This is a place of great hope.

You can do this.

Dee74

Hi and welcome Jarred

you say you don't have the willpower, but I'm not sure that's what you need at all.

I needed a dedication to change - I changed my life completely because my old life was all about drinking.

I accepted that nothing less than that would work for me.

so I guess the question really is - are you ready to do what it takes?

I'm glad I found this community - there's amazing support here and it really got me through some hard times

D

SoberLeigh

Welcome to SR, Jarred.

You will find an abundance of support, encouragement and understanding here.

You CAN be free of alcohol, Jarred.

I am glad that the link you mentioned brought here,

JarredMud

I have to. I'm killing myself. I've lost my 30s to alcohol! I'm depressed and I can't handle it anymore. I lost a wife, a career. Amazingly I went back to school and graduated, drunk. Time to turn it around or kill myself. I'm not actually going to kill myself.

SoberLeigh

Here are some really good links, Jarred:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ependence.html

https://store.samhsa.gov/shin/conten...0/SMA-3720.pdf

Lorax1981

Hi Jarred- you can make the changes one step at a time and one day at a time. Your willpower will start to build each time you turn down a drink. Each night you go to bed sober you'll wake up with stronger sober muscles!

JarredMud

I know! I hate how I feel in the morning and I never do anything productive the day after I drink. I just feel helpless. I had a major test to be credentialed in the health care industry last week. I'm not that religious, but I prayed the night before asking to pass the test. I prayed that I'd never drink again for a sign. I asked for a shooting star for God to answer. Not two minutes later I saw a shooting star. I passed the test and drank that night ignoring my prayer.

SoberLeigh

You can still honor that prayer, Jarred. God is patient and understanding and his timeline is different than ours.

JarredMud

I'm not sober and think God is going to kill me now, lol. Do you guys get together as far as SR goes, ever?

JarredMud

I could be helped with friendship locally, not with giant AA meetings. One on one or up to 3-4 people...

Dee74

We have members from every corner of the would so getting together would be difficult.

I know people have met up on a private basis, once a bond is formed.

the chat room here might be useful if you want one on one of small group recovery talk?

D

JarredMud

Sounds good to me. I just need a start.

Soberwolf

Welcome Jarred

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ful-links.html

PurpleKnight

Welcome to the Forum JarredMud!!

SoberLeigh

How is it going today, Jarred.

Anna

Welcome Jarred, I know it seems overwhelming at the outset but we're all here for you. As Dee said, Chat might suit you, and you will always find lots of support and activity here on the message board.

Hevyn

It's great to meet you, Jarred. We've all felt the way you do - you're never alone.

I lost my 30's, 40's - and beyond to drinking & being reckless. I'm glad you've decided to turn things around. You can do it. There's nothing in it for us anymore.

Dee74

How are you doing Jarred?

D

JarredMud

You guys are great! I want to be a part of that someday. I've finally looked up some meetings near me. I obviously can't do it on my own.