Eauchiche

Last night's meeting left me so crazy, I have finally had it.
The woman leading last night has 27 years. TOTAL control freak. The last guy to share has over 30 years with a multitude of sponsees.

He rambled on for a good ten minutes. At a point SHE cut in and starting cross talking. The meeting went 20 minutes over.

I am going to try open AA meetings. A potential sponsor is a double winner, so this might work. I am aware of the difference between the two programs, but the AA'ers I know are FAR more serene than any ALAnon'er I have ever met. I don't want to end up a bothered control freak after being in a program.

Thanks for letting me vent....

hopepraylove

Don't give up on us, there are also great online speaker meetings, etc. I had a few bad experiences at some meetings too...

I hope you'll find a better meeting.

-Fellow Al-Anon

AnvilheadII

you can find control freaks and issues at AA as well, AlAnon doesn't have the market cornered. but if that one meeting isn't working for you, by all means seek others. what can often happen in small meetings with fewer members that a core group takes over - if not the meeting would dissolve, but these "leaders" then take ownership. it happens. it's human nature.

take the lesson.....and keep carrying the message.

hummingbird358

I was also going to my local one and then stopped and started again only to stop again. The same lady rambles on about her childhood (she is 80 years old now) The last meeting she had to talk over 20 minutes about how clothes were washed back then.... No one in the room was even paying attention. I felt bad for the newcomers who were most likely wondering why they even came. The man who led the meeting also rambled on and on over his childhood which was 30 years ago.

maia1234

E-
I met a lot of good people in my open AA meetings. I would go to 2 a week along with my alanon meetings. You never know who you will meet at one of them.

Keep an open mind and see what you find. Not worth getting upset over the meeting you go to, move on. There is a lot of "fish" in the sea!!

Hugs my friend!!

LexieCat

I, too, think a regular open AA meeting can be refreshing, but I think if you aren't an alcoholic yourself, you owe it to yourself to keep hitting Al-Anon meetings, too. Maybe if you do meet some double winners, one of them can steer you to some better Al-Anon groups.

CodeJob

My second group passed around a calendar to sign up and lead a meeting. Could You impact the group tone by getting more involved?

For me, I move at a faster pace and this sort of scenarios drove me nuts. It reminded me of learning to read as a kid. A small group of us caught on quickly in my class and we had no patience for those who struggled. it was torture to listen to those struggling and sounding out the simplest words. It was the first time it was evident to us people learn at different paces and it was hard at that age to be kind. The readers wanted to soar along from book to book swallowing up words and it was hard to be patient with the slower readers.

I found SR a better fit for my recovery as I could move at my pace and read how others solved their problems. The ones who aren't making progress here I can block or ignore their threads.

A lot of people I met in the rooms never did the steps. No wonder they were still a hot mess.