Cautiously hopeful
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Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Australia
Posts: 537
Cautiously hopeful
Thought I'd share a quick update.
RAH relapsed about 3 months ago after initially doing pretty well after a trip to rehab last year, and then a period of white knuckling it where he hadn't accepted that alcohol couldn't be a part of the life he wanted for himself.
He went back into detox, has come out and has been living with his sister.
He is doing really, really well. Fully engaged in his treatment, is positive, productive, engaged and remorseful. Working hard at our relationship, at the relationship with the kids, with his extended family, volunteering, looking hard for work. He seems very different. As he's being saying tome 'actions not words' and I am watching what those actions say.
He's not living at home, but is spending a lot of time with us, and is quietly going about the business of being a 'present' human being.
I am staying out of his recovery process and working on me.
Who knows what the future holds, but right now, in this moment I am appreciative of what I have, how life is travelling and am happy he's around.
Just wanted to share what's positive in life at the moment!
RAH relapsed about 3 months ago after initially doing pretty well after a trip to rehab last year, and then a period of white knuckling it where he hadn't accepted that alcohol couldn't be a part of the life he wanted for himself.
He went back into detox, has come out and has been living with his sister.
He is doing really, really well. Fully engaged in his treatment, is positive, productive, engaged and remorseful. Working hard at our relationship, at the relationship with the kids, with his extended family, volunteering, looking hard for work. He seems very different. As he's being saying tome 'actions not words' and I am watching what those actions say.
He's not living at home, but is spending a lot of time with us, and is quietly going about the business of being a 'present' human being.
I am staying out of his recovery process and working on me.
Who knows what the future holds, but right now, in this moment I am appreciative of what I have, how life is travelling and am happy he's around.
Just wanted to share what's positive in life at the moment!
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: My mind wanders a lot, but I try to stay in the present.
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Thanks for the Update, Jarp. I'm glad to here things are moving in the right direction.
It took me a long time to learn that the times of peace are a good time to work on our own recovery. It's good to hear that you're working on yourself. It's easy to slack off when things are going well.
Just curious. About how often do you and the kids see him?
It took me a long time to learn that the times of peace are a good time to work on our own recovery. It's good to hear that you're working on yourself. It's easy to slack off when things are going well.
Just curious. About how often do you and the kids see him?
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Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Australia
Posts: 537
Originally Posted by SeriousKarma 
Just curious. About how often do you and the kids see him?
We see him a bit - he volunteers 3 days a week at our son and dd's school for a part of the day. He organises family activities on weekends for us to do (I do absolutely nothing other than hear what the plans are and say "yep we are I" or "no we are not"). He organises a night out a week for us, and has the kids for part a day on the weekend to give me a break - I go and exercise/ see friends/ do something I want. We go to MC once a week - all driven by him.
As time goes on he's been coming over a bit more, and cleaning the house whilst I am at work, grocery shops so I come home to a full cupboard of food and clean washing, and has dinner prepped in the fridge ready to go or if he is seeing us cooks for us as well.
My Mum has been very unwell/ in hospital and he's been going over to her a bit doing her gardening, shopping and cleaning as well.
He's not pressuring me at all which is good - he does want to come home, but is giving me space as well. It's working for me at the moment and helps me keep my nose out of his business.
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