OpenTuning

I've been feeling very, very confident about my sobriety since quitting 5 months ago. Genuinely not wanting to drink any more. Hadn't heard a peep out of my AV for ages. Happily starting my new sober life.

Then I went to Dublin this week on a business trip. All day meetings, then we went out for dinner and on to a pub. Which served Guinness.

I've been to Dublin many times, and drinking Guinness in the town it's made in was always a huge part of that. And it wasn't till we were in one of those great Dublin pubs and people started ordering the black stuff that my AV went into overdrive. Completely took me by surprise. This was also my first work trip since quitting booze, and I'd forgotten just how much I always associated them with drinking. No worrying about coming home drunk and waking up my wife. When the cats away type stuff.

Luckily our host doesn't drink, so I just had what he had, and made it through. But that was really tough. My first real wobble. Even though I have to be honest with myself and acknowledge I never really liked Guinness. I'd never drink it back home. It's that whole association thing. It was realising my old way of life is really gone now.

Not sure why I'm writing this, but I guess it's just to say that no matter how in control you feel, you never know when your AV will strike. Stay safe out there!

GroundhogDay

I have found that surviving events such as this with my sobriety intact helps immensely the next time one comes around. Well done!

The work functions are the hardest since they are hard to dodge and follow stressful days of travel and meetings.

MIRecovery

Be prepared for a delayed reaction to surviving a drinking situation. I have seen a lot of people make it through and not drink only to drink a few day to a week later. At the very least you will feel disjointed for a while

Soberwolf

This is why hanging bk in favour of building our sober muscles up is important in early recovery you done well

& I agree with what Mir said

OpenTuning

Think you're right. Been thinking a lot more about alcohol since coming back, which is probably why I'm back posting on here. I had been at a point where I was hardly even thinking about it any more. Let alone wanting any. I was just putting groceries away and spotted a miniature bottle of aged single malt I'd forgotten about that I'd been hanging onto for a special occasion. Felt a pang of sadness that I'd never taste it. I have never liked whiskey. It was always a search for the one I disliked the least. Why on Earth would I feel sad that I will never drink something I can say with absolute certainty I wouldn't enjoy. But there it was.

Hopefully things will get back on track soon.

biminiblue

This cannot be underestimated. There is some "thing" that compels people to drink after they've made it past some drinking event safely. I've seen it again and again.

NoelleR

Hey! Hey! You're a weeble*!

(o:

teatreeoil007

Hmmmm...Dark beer has always been one of my weaknesses...the darker the better. I developed a taste for beer at a very young age as my dad let me take a few swigs from his beer bottles growing up.

I led a very clear and sober life all throughout my teen years, but in college started doing the drinking and partying thing that seemed so normal and "okay".

I like beer...but it doesn't like me...Glad you had a good trip. Would love to go to Ireland as it is in my blood!

teatreeoil007

OT:

Open tuning...

Pretty sure that's a guitar thing...and if so, it's a very cool option!

Music is an awesome outlet and coping skill...

Anna

I'm glad you got through the Dublin trip.

I experienced the 'delayed reaction to surviving a drinking situation' and the next morning went out to buy wine and continued on from there. The disease is very tricky!

nyala

Congrats on surviving that one Open.... ( or can I call you EADGBE ?)

Thanks for posting this thread. I was interested to read the cautions from others with more sober time about the possible delayed reaction.

I have similar sober time to you (4 months ) and managed to avoid a huge weekend long stay party last weekend - although I did join them for a breakfast.

I haven't been craving alcohol, but my AV is back with talk off ' so- how long are you going to keep this up ?". Also thoughts of how I am going to cope with visits from crazy family members / Xmas / both of those together are foremost in my mind.

The point is, a couple of weeks ago I would have said I had reached a new period of calm. Now I feel I have to be on my guard again.

Stay well

Fradley

Ps - chuck the single malt out

Carver

I second this, happened to me a hundred times.

BUT congratulations! You fought back against the AV and won! That's awesome.

Stay vigilant, but be proud of yourself

OpenTuning

Thanks for all the support. Seems this week is all about testing me. Had some old friends come round yesterday who haven't seen for 6 months. My wife opened a very nice bottle of wine, and immediately everyone was talking about why I wasn't having any. They felt sorry for my wife that I was making her drink alone. How selfish of me. All said in an apparently good natured way, but I really had to battle to keep smiling through it.

I put it down to the fact that I skipped the Rock Bottom stage. Most people are surprised when I say I stopped drinking. "But you're not an alcoholic" is the standard response. I could try to explain the reason they don't think that is that most of my heaviest drinking was before they met me or when I'm away on trips. I could try and explain how not drinking too much was a constant battle. That I'd be obsessed about my next drink from the moment I had my first one and stopping at 2 or 3 was usually down to careful timing for when I went out or making sure I had a reason why I had to leave. That in no way, shape or form did I have a healthy relationship with alcohol. But it's easier to say I've just decided I don't want to drink any more.

But the good thing is I didn't drink. And the more of these tests that I pass, hopefully the easier it will be. I'll just be the guy who doesn't drink and everyone else can just get over that!

By the way, for the guitar comments, yes that's the new hobby I started up a few years ago, and then found myself in a band. It has actually been a big help on the sobriety front. First, I realised very early on I played much better sober. And second, when I quit drinking I started deliberately scheduling band rehearsals for the nights I'd usually be out drinking, which gave a great excuse for not being at the pub, and as something fun and rewarding to do instead. Highly recommend it for anyone who's into music.

Soberwolf

You done great not drinking but remember you don't have to test yourself sorry your friends were like that

Rock on !