This explains a lot
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Texas
Posts: 2,872
This explains a lot
"Healthy people demonstrate respect for personal boundaries while toxic people, including a narcissist, will see them as a challenge". (Tina Swithin, "One Moms Battle")
Hmmm, yep! No respect for boundaries, nada. Because they don't exist to an alcoholic.
Thought this may ring true for a lot of you.
Hmmm, yep! No respect for boundaries, nada. Because they don't exist to an alcoholic.
Thought this may ring true for a lot of you.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Alaska
Posts: 2,913
I found this one online not too long ago, but I don't know where to attribute it to:
Pay attention when people react with anger or hostility to your boundaries. You have found the edge where their respect for you ends.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 1,452
From the reading I have done about narcissists, I believe that they have an emotional hole so deep and wide that it compels them to fill it with energy from other people.
They do not believe in themselves; they do not have a self source of self esteem or self love. So, they seek it from others, to the point of emptying the energy from their partners like the water swirls down the drain.
There are no boundaries with others because narcissists' needs are so huge that they suck the life from others. Others exist mainly, in their unarticulated emotional compulsion, to fill their emptiness.
It is very sad, and for me, as the partner of a narcissist, it was very dangerous to keep my sense of self whole.
ShootingStar1
They do not believe in themselves; they do not have a self source of self esteem or self love. So, they seek it from others, to the point of emptying the energy from their partners like the water swirls down the drain.
There are no boundaries with others because narcissists' needs are so huge that they suck the life from others. Others exist mainly, in their unarticulated emotional compulsion, to fill their emptiness.
It is very sad, and for me, as the partner of a narcissist, it was very dangerous to keep my sense of self whole.
ShootingStar1
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 2,281
Originally Posted by Forourgirls 
"Healthy people demonstrate respect for personal boundaries while toxic people, including a narcissist, will see them as a challenge". (Tina Swithin, "One Moms Battle")
Hmmm, yep! No respect for boundaries, nada. Because they don't exist to an alcoholic.
Thought this may ring true for a lot of you.
Hmmm, yep! No respect for boundaries, nada. Because they don't exist to an alcoholic.
Thought this may ring true for a lot of you.
Recovering Alanon/codependent/non-drinking member of the family disease of alcoholism. I'm starting to understand some of the mental health issues I've had.
I'm learning what personal boundaries are, and how to respect them. Work in progress here. It's a journey, not a race.
I can't even fathom the narcissist issues. I'm very sorry for any of you dealing with that.
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 1,252
what respect
Originally Posted by Forourgirls
"Healthy people demonstrate respect for personal boundaries while toxic people, including a narcissist, will see them as a challenge". (Tina Swithin, "One Moms Battle")
Hmmm, yep! No respect for boundaries, nada. Because they don't exist to an alcoholic.
Thought this may ring true for a lot of you.
Hmmm, yep! No respect for boundaries, nada. Because they don't exist to an alcoholic.
Thought this may ring true for a lot of you.
Peace
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 6,262
While some alcoholics are narcissists, most aren't. In his book "Alcoholic Anonymous" Bill Wilson describes the alcoholic as "self-centered in the extreme, self-willed and grandiose." They think the world revolves around them. But that doesn't mean they suffer from narcissistic personality disorder. If they get sober, work the 12 Steps and therapy, eventually they become much less selfish. It takes time and a lot of work, but they do change. True narcissists never change.
Guest
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,826
People who don't respect boundaries be it Alcoholics or Narcissists also see it as a challenge to show you that you aren't going to tell them what to do, in their mind.
A very reasonable,respectful boundary to us can be an enraging thing to them if it means they may not get their way or might not get what they want to get their needs met.
A very reasonable,respectful boundary to us can be an enraging thing to them if it means they may not get their way or might not get what they want to get their needs met.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 1,572
I have never believed that my STBXAH is a narcissist, he has a raging case of "egomaniac with an inferiority complex." Now that I've moved out, I have a non-negotiable boundary that I simply will not be around him when he's drinking. There have been two occasions when I've taken our son over there for dinner, and we've left early because STBXAH was drinking. I have an unbelievable amount of serenity about the whole thing. I'm gearing up for a test, though...we are all HUGE Cubs fans. Like, rabid fans who know the team's history for the last hundred years. And I have a feeling that if they make it to the World Series, STBXAH will suggest we all watch a game together. Up to now, I haven't said a word to him about my boundary. I just enforced it. That could get harder if I decide to decline an invitation to something that will SURELY involve him drinking. But you know what? I. Don't. Care.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 2,805
One time I told my narcissistic father that he needed to respect my boundaries and not bring my inebriated mother to a choral event at my daughter's elementary school. He retorted, "Those aren't my boundaries," and threatened to come anyway, although in the end, they did not come. They did blow up my cell phone and my home phone though with at least 12-15 phone calls and nasty messages.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
