Hereandnow2

My dad is 72 years and one of my favorite people on the planet! He is the lights of my little boys' lives and unfortunately is a very heavy drinker possibly an alcoholic. My mother has fought with him for years about his drinking. Most days he has one beer glass of wine and then sometimes on a gathering like last night, he will drink a couple of beers, a bottle of wine, and maybe a bourbon, a lot!! He was recently in the senior Olympics watches what he eats, reads, and is basically very healthy. Will he have some terrible effect to drinking like this his whole life? I'm worried. I just sent him a message asking him if he ever thought about stopping. He quit for year when I was a kid bc of a med he was on and said it was no big deal. Not hard for him. As an alcoholic I know I couldn't have done that. What are your thoughts? His best friend is having liver issues, another got a dui, and other died of cirrhosis a few years back. I'm scared but I know there isn't much I can do right?

Anna

No, there isn't much you can do, Hereandnow. As you know, it takes motivation to stop drinking and it doesn't sound like he is quite ready for that yet. It's good that you talk to him about it and express your concern. Hopefully he will reach a point where he wants to stop.

thomas11

My father is very similar. I worry about him. But he's his own man and is going to do what he wants. He worked hard his whole life. He's actually better now than he used to be. If he drinks a bit too much, he just falls asleep. Many years ago he was drinking a lot. My brother and I sat him down and told him that we thought he should really consider quitting, or at least cutting back alot. His response was very succinct: "f*** you". And he walked away.

Soberween

Not a doctor so I can't give any advice in regards to your dad, but my experience with my father is this. He was a heavy drinker his entire life and he is now 89 years old and is in very good health with no apparent consequences from his years of drinking. He does have some dementia, but his doctor told me that most likely would have occurred whether a drinker or not. Oddly, he barely drink alcohol at all anymore (in the last five years). It's almost as if with the dementia, the mental obsession he had with alcohol has been forgotten along with lots of other memories. He displays zero alcoholic tendencies at this advanced age. We'll go out to dinner and he'll ask what beers they have on tap and if they don't have any that he likes, he will order a root beer. This would have never happened in the past.

Keep in mind, every human is different. I'm sure that there are many that drank a lot less than my dad that had liver complications, high blood pressure, diabetes, etc as a result of their heavy alcohol use. My dad's genetic constitution is not made up of a liver that was easily compromised. There is no family history of liver complications, however, there is quite a history of alcoholism on his side of the family.

Soberwolf

My dad is the same

PurpleKnight

Not much can be done if he's not willing to change anything, I know for myself there was nothing that anyone could have said to me to make me change my drinking until I had a real acceptance of my own!!

Hang in there, you'll find plenty of support here on SR!!

Hereandnow2

Thanks so much for your responses. Strangely enough I got the courage to text my dad about this. Not asking for a response. He quickly responded that he's quite quite a few times for long periods of time without drinking and it was no big deal. He said he prob would not stop but prob needs to slow down. He also said he was proud of me. It ended up being really positive.

D122y

My Dad still drinks he is 70. He never drank like me though. He was able to control it much better than me.