jfernon999

I started a suboxone treatment clinic just over two weeks ago. In addition to my weekly prescriptions I attend weekly therapy appointments and bi-weekly counseling groups. I must also attend a minimum of four NA/AA meetings per week and get my attendance sheet signed and stamped by the leader of each meeting I attend. I have struggled with addiction for almost twenty years now and I've been addicted to heroin for over four years. I was placed in my first inpatient rehab when I was fourteen. I have since been to four more inpatient treatment facilities, three detox facilities, three halfway houses, and seven hospitalizations for severe depression including two suicide attempts. In all the years I have sought treatment I have attended AA/NA meetings. I usually leave meetings feeling good because of the support and encouragement that I get when I attend. I am going to NA meetings at least four times a week and I have found a great home group that has a welcoming atmosphere with some great people. My issue is, that as much as I want to practice the program and work the steps towards recovery, I feel like if I divulge the fact that I'm on suboxone at the meeting I will become an outcast and made to feel unwelcome and not clean/sober. I have read post after post on several websites about people on suboxone that go to meetings and are treated as if they are no longer welcome! Apparently NA's official stance on Suboxone or Methadone is that if you are currently being treated with these medications you are not clean and sober so you should not be allowed to chair, lead, do service work, or even speak during a meeting! I get a lot more out of the meetings I go to if I share my struggles with addiction and how I'm working to get better. I find it hypocritical for people in NA to judge anyone on maintenance therapy when a huge majority of people in NA smoke cigarettes, drink coffee, and use doctor prescribed medications for depression/anxiety. These substances are all mind altering drugs/chemicals so why is it ok to use any of these substances but not a medication that has been proven to not only keep people off the streets buying drugs but has also been shown to help people become productive members of society? I have been to meetings where I have seen people pick up key tags and chips for years clean/sober while they are prescribed opiate pain medications and benzos. I have asked them how they can take these narcotics and still be considered sober and the response has always been the same, "I only take them as prescribed by my doctor." So let me get this straight you can take any narcotic drug a doctor prescribes you for pain/anxiety etc. but if you take a medication prescribed by a doctor for the treatment of addiction you are not clean/sober and should not be allowed to speak at meetings!!!!! I'm sorry but that's F&%king insane!!!!! So people like me, who want to attend meetings, are forced to lie/hide the treatment plan we are on in order to get the full benefit that meetings offer even though honesty is a major foundation of recovery in the meetings. I believe that the NA community need to wake up and smell some of that coffee they drink neurotically! The Hazelden treatment program, which is considered the benchmark of addiction treatment, has stated that studies show that 86% of people addicted to opiates especially heroin, who try an abstinence based program like NA/AA or an abstinence only rehabilitation facility, will fail within the first six months to a year! Meanwhile the research found that 43% of people, on a medication like suboxone are still sober five years after the beginning of treatment. This is why in 2012 the Hazelden program began a suboxone treatment clinic at their facilities even though they have been a strictly abstinence based program since the beginning!!! I am no mathematician but if I had a choice of having only a 14% chance of staying clean for up to a year or a 43% chance of staying clean 5 years or more I think I would go with the 43%!

ScottFromWI

Welcome to SR Jfernon and thanks for sharing your story. A couple of thoughts

1. Dont' worry about what anyone else's "stance" is on suboxone. You are being treated by a doctor and that's a medical issue between you and him. It's really no one else's business. If attending meetings is helpful to you absolutely keep attending meetings.

2. Don't worry about stats - you personally have 100% chance of success if you truly want to. You can find statistics to tell any story you wish, so make your own statistics and keep working your program in the best way you can.

Beeraholic

Very interesting post. I had no idea that this was an issue. Your point on hypocrisy is a great one. I agree, keep attending if you are getting something out of it. I wouldn't mention your treatment if you feel it will harm your experience.

Most importantly, I am really impressed that you have turned your life around and are taking recovery so seriously. Wish you all the luck in the world!

PurpleKnight

Welcome to the Forum Jfernon!!

I think we need to get to the point of having confidence in our own recovery, there's always gonna be opinions, books, research, theories, philosophies etc etc

At the end of the day we know where we started from and we know where we are now, and if that place is a bit better than the last chapter of our lives, then we're well on our way to making our lives better, away from the grip of addiction.

I always like to picture myself looking back on my life when I reach my final days and wonder to myself will I be proud of the changes that I made to turn my life around from alcoholism, no one else gets to have that thought for me, not members of a meeting, nor experts in addiction.

If the answer is always a resounding yes . . . then we can be sure we're on the right path!!

Soberwolf

Hello & Welcome Jfernon999

Roxyblues

Sub ozone is a nightmare drug in and of itself. AA or NA will only work if one completely abstains from all mind and mood altering drugs. Either you have hit bottom and are ready to clean or you are not. Not judging as I have been exactly where you are. It takes what it takes.

That said, keep going to NA or AS and keep the suboxone use to yourself if you feel judged. Better to go than not go, but the magic of the program and the joy it can bring wont happen as long as you are taking suboxone or anything mood altering.

BTW, taking suboxone more than 10 days or more is just prolonging the misery of actually stopping one day and potentially creates a much harder and longer withdrawal period than smack. Kicking sub, Bupe or done is as bad as it gets as far as opiates. Be careful and keep the dose low IMO. It doesn't take much Bupe to saturate the receptors.

jfernon999

I really appreciate all of the input I have received so far. All of you were very helpful and insightful! I am excited to be a part of Sober Recovery and look forward to getting more great advice on my road to recovery! I am at the point in my life where I can't take anymore of the pain and misery associated with drug use and I think it's wonderful that there are places like Sober Recovery to share and get help with my struggle. God bless all of you and thank you very much!!!!

Roxyblues

Hey man, good luck to you. I am opiate guy myself. Abused the heck out of everything from fentanyl patches, dillaudid, Roxies, Opanna, norcos, done, subs and etc.

Been off pain meds since 2011, but turned to bottle at times since then. I know and appreciate the struggles. Half measures will get us no where. You may not want to hear this, but subs are a half measure. Nevertheless, stay close to meetings and people in AA and NA until you sort it out.