Too soon to work the steps? A sponsorship question.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Location: CA.....Hometown : Sioux Falls
Posts: 2,624
Too soon to work the steps? A sponsorship question.
I've been sober for 2 1/2 months, going to the very few meetings available and still no sponsor. I have taken the 3rd step with a Christian friend and I'm writing my 4th. The problem is that I'm told by sponsors and members it takes months to even take the 1st step. They all have the same rules. Am I going too fast?
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
Hi.
Good job in getting into recovery.
In my experience it depends on the individual and I like to see step one done thoroughly as it’s the foundation of the program. It takes time to digest it and continue on to the next.
I needed to remember that doing the steps is not a race and doing them constantly in recovery helps us realize what we missed doing them previously.
I also learned if I’m having difficulty with any to go back to the previous one for help.
BE WELL
Good job in getting into recovery.
In my experience it depends on the individual and I like to see step one done thoroughly as it’s the foundation of the program. It takes time to digest it and continue on to the next.
I needed to remember that doing the steps is not a race and doing them constantly in recovery helps us realize what we missed doing them previously.
I also learned if I’m having difficulty with any to go back to the previous one for help.
BE WELL
Trudgin
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 6,348
Glad you're posting friend!!
How fast do you want to recover?
Our book states - Here are the steps we took.......action! Not, here are the 100's of meetings we went to and talked about the steps.
Don't let anyone dissuade you from immediate step work = hogwash. The original members did step work at once over a very short period of time and went to work helping others.
Chapter 7
Practical experience shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics. It works when other activities fail. This is our twelfth suggestion: Carry this message to other alcoholics! You can help when no one else can. You can secure their confidence when others fail. Remember they are very ill.
A.A. History -- Let's Ask Bill W.
In Back to Basics meetings, attendees are expected to go through all 12 steps in four one-hour sessions, and they're expected to stick to them. In the meetings there is little talk about the problem and the individual's drinking career. The talk is about God, Spirituality and The Steps. The Steps are begun immediately with none of the one step a year procrastination, with none of the psychobabble inherited from the treatment centers.
In most current A.A. meetings, the primary A.A. format is open discussion, where people talk about anything, the "My Dog Died, My Car Wouldn't Start, But I Didn't Drink Over It" meetings. That's about all they talk about. No God. No Steps.
I would have been lost attempting step work without some mentoring/guidance from a sponsor or friends in the program. You will find others to help you if you ask God for the teacher to appear......... I promise!
Yes, at your own pace as PurpleKnight suggested, it's your recovery........
Thanks for the post, I think this confuses a lot of our friends, I know it did me!
How fast do you want to recover?
Our book states - Here are the steps we took.......action! Not, here are the 100's of meetings we went to and talked about the steps.
Don't let anyone dissuade you from immediate step work = hogwash. The original members did step work at once over a very short period of time and went to work helping others.
Chapter 7
Practical experience shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics. It works when other activities fail. This is our twelfth suggestion: Carry this message to other alcoholics! You can help when no one else can. You can secure their confidence when others fail. Remember they are very ill.
A.A. History -- Let's Ask Bill W.
In Back to Basics meetings, attendees are expected to go through all 12 steps in four one-hour sessions, and they're expected to stick to them. In the meetings there is little talk about the problem and the individual's drinking career. The talk is about God, Spirituality and The Steps. The Steps are begun immediately with none of the one step a year procrastination, with none of the psychobabble inherited from the treatment centers.
In most current A.A. meetings, the primary A.A. format is open discussion, where people talk about anything, the "My Dog Died, My Car Wouldn't Start, But I Didn't Drink Over It" meetings. That's about all they talk about. No God. No Steps.
I would have been lost attempting step work without some mentoring/guidance from a sponsor or friends in the program. You will find others to help you if you ask God for the teacher to appear......... I promise!
Yes, at your own pace as PurpleKnight suggested, it's your recovery........
Thanks for the post, I think this confuses a lot of our friends, I know it did me!
A Day at a Time
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Grand Rapids MI
Posts: 6,435
I think it is a very personal journey. My very experienced sponsor just wanted me to go to a ton of meetings the first year and to meet with him daily.
6 years latter looking back I think, at least for me his approach was correct. My brain was pickled. Although I could have worked the steps I needed to be able to have clear and rational thought which really took almost a year.
I was a hard core late stage alcoholic who never was anything but drunk or high since the age of 14 so I may have been slower than some
6 years latter looking back I think, at least for me his approach was correct. My brain was pickled. Although I could have worked the steps I needed to be able to have clear and rational thought which really took almost a year.
I was a hard core late stage alcoholic who never was anything but drunk or high since the age of 14 so I may have been slower than some
Guest
Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 237
Hello 
For me, it is vital i keep re-affirming my step 1 and i realise that it is an ongoing process of surrender.
I am on the 4th step... but with my dual-diagnosis, i find that my thoughts, feelings and behaviour can get very unmanagable so i am always back to deepening my connection with the God of my understanding.
To have the knowledge that this (addiction) is a three-fold illness, for me, creates an awareness, along with 12 incidences of powerlessness and unmanagability, strengthens my resolve. (a step 1 admittance)
Just for today.
With love.
For me, it is vital i keep re-affirming my step 1 and i realise that it is an ongoing process of surrender.
I am on the 4th step... but with my dual-diagnosis, i find that my thoughts, feelings and behaviour can get very unmanagable so i am always back to deepening my connection with the God of my understanding.
To have the knowledge that this (addiction) is a three-fold illness, for me, creates an awareness, along with 12 incidences of powerlessness and unmanagability, strengthens my resolve. (a step 1 admittance)
Just for today.
With love.
Left the bottle behind 4/16/2015
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: NC
Posts: 1,416
I agree with others that the timing of the steps is unique to each individual, but a good sponsor is needed to help discern when you're ready for each one. I had been taking the first step for years but continued to drink regardless. It took really screwing up badly before I started taking the rest of the steps seriously. I'm about 6 months sober now and just working on step 4.
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