MIRecovery

I've read hundreds of posts from people discussing what an alcoholic is and whether they are one of them.

My brain tends to work overtime on different aspects of alcoholism and here are my thoughts.

It is pretty easy to recognize a hard core alcoholic. I drank at 6:00 AM to feel normal. I would say by any definition I had a problem. My wife on the other hand drinks her 2 to 3 glasses of wine a week and sometimes doesn't even finish them. By any definition she doesn't have a problem.

Now comes the interesting part. That huge middle ground between my wife and myself.

Where I believe so many go wrong is they believe alcoholism is a destination. Oh sure you can get there if you work at it but being an alcoholic begins long long before you are drinking at 6:00 AM.

Alcoholism is a journey. Do I drink more than I want, do I think about drinking, do I become a different person when I drink, do I think things aren't fun without alcohol.

The is no difference between myself and the person who is a lite drinker. The only difference is where you are on the alcohol continuum.

If the switch has been flipped I hate to say it but YOU ARE AN ALCOHOLIC. I was a late stage alcoholic but many are not not. It is like being a little bit pregnant. You may not be showing but that doesn't change the inevitable.

Hevyn

Fabulous post, MIR. It is indeed a journey. I wish I'd realized it decades ago. Thank you for this.

MesaMan

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I like the 'Binary', quantifiable nature of this Test in answering this interesting question. For me. I are one.

- Johns Hopkins Alcoholism Questionnaire -
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Light76

This is a really interesting point that I've been thinking about for sure. I'm clearly now an alcoholic, drink in the morning all through the day ughhh don't feel normal w out etc. I have good relationships nice things whatever. I think I'd have not been on this course bc my family warned me without dating another addict/alcoholic that I was in love with who always passed me the next drink it was part of my DNA and I chose to drink it. I think there're all kinds of ways to come by what we call alcoholism. Therere people who do it for social reasons, emotional reasons, stress, depression, excuse to act out etc etc. basically I am physically addicted which sucks. I think many people who drink later in the day may be more psychologically addicted which also is no fun and might be a form of them being physically addicted without all the symptoms. I think anyone who lets themself drink enough is going to get tolerance and withdrawal which I believe to be the hall marks of this addiction. I'm not so sure I'm a true alcoholic bc I don't black out but at this point I'd never consider quitting cold turkey bc I'd probably die. I have had periods of drinking very little but when u excessively do this for long enough it can happen to anyone and it sucks

LBrain

Absolutely MIR.

I took the JH test. I didn't ace it (I may have cheated on a couple answers), but they say "You are in end stage alcoholism."

WAS, I WAS an end stage alcoholic. Now I'm an early stage SOBERISTA!

It's never too late OR too early to turn things around.

tursiops999

Thank you, such a good topic for me. I like the Johns Hopkins questionnaire, and I come out as early stage or middle stage alcoholic, depending on how I answer a couple of questions I'm not sure about.

I have wrestled with this question on and off since getting sober a year ago. I think the confusion comes from the fact that I had no real obvious consequences, at least that I was aware of. I drank most evenings at home alone, but not every evening. I drank between a half-bottle and full bottle of wine. I had started to want to limit myself to one or two drinks a day, but that just didn't seem to happen . A couple of times at parties I lost count of my drinks and drank more than I intended, and had one blackout. I also added in one pain pill most evenings, as I have chronic back pain. I started to make sure I always had a bottle of wine if we were headed on an overnight trip, or an overnight at my boat, or whatever. So, I had "drinking more than I wanted to", and "thinking about drinking".

I started to feel like the alcohol was getting the upper hand, and yet I wasn't quitting. I had pondered AA from time to time but never went ... one afternoon kind of suddenly I just decided it was time, I needed help. I haven't had a drink or a pain pill since my first meeting.

I get thrown off sometimes in AA, because I hear the horror stories of such dramatic things happening, and I can't always relate. But I think you're right MIR ... it's the same disease, and hearing others share how it gets later on can save me the suffering of taking myself all the way out to the end, with all the consequences.

Fly N Buy

My favorite paragraph from the journal of the first 100. I read it and read it and read it........I am not unique.

Pg 30
Most of us have been unwilling to admit we were real alcoholics. No person likes to think he is bodily and mentally different from his fellows. Therefore, it is not surprising that our drinking careers have been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove we could drink like other people. The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death.

helpimalive

Lol. The test tells me "You are an end stage alcoholic." At 27. I just have to laugh at how efficiently I proceeded directly to the "end stage."

esinger

I am an imperfect human being who drank away his worries until I couldn't function with out it. Real alcoholic, fake alcoholic, alcoholic, problem drinker, who cares. If you have an obsession with alcohol or any other drug you should probably take care of it or eventually it will take care of you.

Madmartigan

I'm not sure how I feel about defining alcoholism. I don't think any test can tell you if you are or not. I honestly don't even like the words alcoholic or addict as a definition of a person. People are extremely complex beings and their actions are just as complex. Why do we do what we do? Who knows, everyone is different. I think I'm most comfortable with "if drugs, sex, alcohal, food, or whatever causes problems in your life i.e. health, relationships, financial, professional etc. You need to re-evaluate yourself and do whatever is necessary to fix the behavior." I am on my second attempt at sobriety but I don't want my drinking problem to define me. So I guess the trick is moving on with your life while never forgetting you had a problem in order to not have it recur.

courage2

Am I a REAL alcoholic?

Yup. (raises hand.)

I don't need tests. It's like taking a walk in deep space without a space suit to test the air. For me, the answer is obvious. I just need to remember it, always.

PurpleKnight

I didn't drink at 6 am, but if you had asked me:
The answer was yes, yes, yes and yes . . . the destructive behaviours in amongst either 2 bottles of wine a night or that 2 beers, that's what is the constant amongst the variables!!

Great post!!

mns1

Very insightful post MIR thank you!

Soberwolf

Thank you for another great insightful thread Mir

Carver

I sometimes question whether I'm an alcoholic or not. But that's usually when the AV starts whispering, or when I hear stories of people getting themselves into more trouble than I ever did.

But there's no doubt really. I couldn't live without drinking. I'm an alcoholic.

End-stage, according to that test!