kla

Started a new job recently, and later this week will be away from home for a conference. I've done a few similar in the years since I stopped drinking, but this one has me very anxious for some reason. Couldn't sleep at all last night so stressed out. Hope I don't slip up.

melki

It's all within your control. I also obsess over things ahead of time, but then once they're happening, it's never as scary as it seemed in my anxiety-ridden head. You can prepare a plan. One of the best advices I can give you is to always have a non-alcoholic drink in your hand. That has helped me tremendously. Also, going in prepared that absolutely under no circumstances "Yes" could be a possible response when offered an alcoholic drink. Even if everyone else has one, "no thanks, soda for me" is perfectly acceptable, no further explanations needed. You might also find yourself surprised that there are plenty other non-drinkers around and it's completely okay.

Meraviglioso

Being that it is a new job it is even more critical that you be on your best behavior and make a good impression. Drinking, any amount, will not help that. First of all you might end up drunk and make a fool of yourself. But even if you were able to keep it to a minimum and only drink a little, think of how you would feel the next day knowing you drank… probably pretty guilty, angry and sad. Those negative emotions would surely affect your attitude and performance the following day. It just isn't worth it. Stay sober.
Definitely keep a drink in your hand. I have relied on soda water and lime up until recently. I just a week or so ago discovered that i love pineapple juice. I've even started mixing it with coconut water for extra flavor. The past two days I have had some cravings hit me out of the blue, one so strong I was *thisclose* to drinking. But I poured myself a juice and I swear to you, the craving went away nearly instantly. I am convinced it has something to do with the sugar in the juice which I was missing when I was relying solely on water as my replacement drink. Long story short, think about a juice you like and give that a try.
Best of luck to you!

ccam1973

Kla, you can do this. The first work trip I went on after I quit I felt the same anxiety. Just have a plan for everything. Make sure you know how you will react to being away from home and possibly in situations when others are drinking.

I was surrounded by drinkers on my first outing. No one cared or or gave it a second thought that I was drinking diet coke the whole night. I went to bed sober and woke up happy and clear headed. Now I have a few under my belt and I will say they get easier.

Go into it knowing that you will not drink and stick with your plan. Try to have an exit strategy just in case you need one.

Have faith in yourself.

Soberwolf

Have you tried breathing exercises, actual exercise or meditation

These things help me

thomas11

I think its good you are thinking about it. It allows you to mentally prepare and avoid the potential pit falls that you may face. You can do it.

Sasha4

Is the stress because you think you may drink at the conference?
Or is it just work anxiety in general?

kla

Thanks everyone for your kind words, it does help. I think i am stressed because my usual method of not drinking at events centered around alcohol is to show up a little late, after cocktail hour ends, and leave a little early, generally not long after dinner. This has worked for me the last 3.5 years, many weddings, reuions, etc.

Wont work monday though, because the dinner is on a boat, which is leaving the dock. So unless im ready to do some swimming, im in it from start to finish. 15+ years ago one of my least favorable memories took place on a similar booze cruise, so that doesnt help. Sort of looking forward to doing it right this time, but have to admit i am a bit scared.

thomas11

kla, how long have you been sober?

kla

Quit drinking in january 2012, and only slipped once, march 2014.

matilda123

Good advice on this thread! I don't have much to add except I travel a lot for work and being being "away" seemed to give me permission to drink.

One strategy I've been employing is to have myself booked in a hotel with a really fabulous gym and plan to get up early in the morning to work out. Knowing I'm working out early keeps me sober (and, gives me a great reason to turn in early if I'm out with colleagues) and makes for the start of a great next day.

matilda123

Kla, I realize that I missed the part about being on the boat and not being able to leave. That does make the situation especially hard. But there will be lots of beautiful scenery to look at, I hope, and a chance to build a new memory.

Also, one thing that has surprised me when I'm not drinking, is how little folks tend to drink at events where I thought "everyone" was drinking, and drinking as much as me. That wasn't true, to my surprise! You will be in good company, I'm sure.

matilda123

That is fantastic and inspiring!!

Dee74

There are some great tips here for all social occasions:

Crying Out Now: Thanksgiving Survival Guide

I'm assuming the cruise is mandatory.

I would feel apprehensive about going to something for which I have no escape plan either, but the fact is every day I'm surrounded by drinkers - neighbours, family, friends, people hanging out at cafes.

The bottom line is don't drink - ever - no matter what.

The cruise is a few hours.

I have every confidence in you kla

D