Evicted and unsure of what to do now.
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Join Date: May 2013
Location: uk
Posts: 368
Evicted and unsure of what to do now.
I don't really know why I am posting, I think I just need to not feel alone atm. I know this is a mess I have gotten myself into and I have a plan to get out of it. I just wish I didn't have to have one at all.
My rAbf had to move out of his flat in April as his landlady decided to sell up. At the time, I was helping him look for a property to buy with his inheritance money and entirely in his name. The plan was that I would move in with him and benefit by being mortgage and rent free. He would benefit by having invested his money and, frankly, things were good and we wanted to move in together.
Throughout, though. I had it in mind that I could also use the situation to make sure I had saved enough funds to get out of there if I needed to.
So, on the basis that he wouldn't be living in my small flat with me very long, we put his things in storage and he moved in.
Two months later, he relapsed. My landlady discovered this and was not happy. Particularly as I had just informed her I would be seeking legal advice as drains fell on and damaged my car and she was refusing to pay up. So, as she was looking for something anyway, she banned him from the property if he was drinking. Fair enough. He sobered up and we kept our heads down and found a place to buy. That property is about to get to the point of us putting a deposit down and exchanging contracts.
Yesterday, he relapsed again. Only this time, being worse for wear, upon hearing my landlord in the block of flats, he went out and demanded the money owed to me and wouldn't let my landlord get through the door (just stood and blocked it, no physical contact). My landlady just called and has evicted me.
I told him to stay in a hotel until he is sober and I took his keys. He wasn't happy about it and I have no idea where we will stand with each other when he sobers up.
So now I have a dilemna. I can move into a smaller flat (wow rents have gone up!) in the next few weeks. I know I will be able to afford to and I will be out of here asap. Alternatively, I can wait for the house buy to go through. IF it goes through within the two months notice period, IF my Abf doesn't do an about-face and call the whole thing off, I will be better off financially and won't have to pay the costs of moving twice in two months.
If I wait for the house, though and it falls through. I will then have to move quickly.
At the moment, I am going to sell my (very old) piano to help with moving costs. I am going to view flats and get ready to move, but I am leaning towards waiting a month before signing anything. If the house works out, I can then take my time to save up and move somewhere half-way decent if I decide that's what I want to do.
It's just additional stress I didn't need. I love him and in the months when he is sober, we are so happy. But in the weeks when he is drunk, I will no-longer be around him. We agreed that last time when it all got very ugly for the first time.
I hate living here anyway, I was going to move around Christmas time because the landlady is so awful and I can't really persue her for the money for my car until I am out of here, but I wanted to be able to do it on my own schedule.
Now I have no idea what is happening with my relationship. No idea where bf is. No idea if he will call off the house buy. Not entirely sure how to fund a move. URGH.
Ok, rant over. I just needed to feel less alone in this. Thanks for reading, guys.
My rAbf had to move out of his flat in April as his landlady decided to sell up. At the time, I was helping him look for a property to buy with his inheritance money and entirely in his name. The plan was that I would move in with him and benefit by being mortgage and rent free. He would benefit by having invested his money and, frankly, things were good and we wanted to move in together.
Throughout, though. I had it in mind that I could also use the situation to make sure I had saved enough funds to get out of there if I needed to.
So, on the basis that he wouldn't be living in my small flat with me very long, we put his things in storage and he moved in.
Two months later, he relapsed. My landlady discovered this and was not happy. Particularly as I had just informed her I would be seeking legal advice as drains fell on and damaged my car and she was refusing to pay up. So, as she was looking for something anyway, she banned him from the property if he was drinking. Fair enough. He sobered up and we kept our heads down and found a place to buy. That property is about to get to the point of us putting a deposit down and exchanging contracts.
Yesterday, he relapsed again. Only this time, being worse for wear, upon hearing my landlord in the block of flats, he went out and demanded the money owed to me and wouldn't let my landlord get through the door (just stood and blocked it, no physical contact). My landlady just called and has evicted me.
I told him to stay in a hotel until he is sober and I took his keys. He wasn't happy about it and I have no idea where we will stand with each other when he sobers up.
So now I have a dilemna. I can move into a smaller flat (wow rents have gone up!) in the next few weeks. I know I will be able to afford to and I will be out of here asap. Alternatively, I can wait for the house buy to go through. IF it goes through within the two months notice period, IF my Abf doesn't do an about-face and call the whole thing off, I will be better off financially and won't have to pay the costs of moving twice in two months.
If I wait for the house, though and it falls through. I will then have to move quickly.
At the moment, I am going to sell my (very old) piano to help with moving costs. I am going to view flats and get ready to move, but I am leaning towards waiting a month before signing anything. If the house works out, I can then take my time to save up and move somewhere half-way decent if I decide that's what I want to do.
It's just additional stress I didn't need. I love him and in the months when he is sober, we are so happy. But in the weeks when he is drunk, I will no-longer be around him. We agreed that last time when it all got very ugly for the first time.
I hate living here anyway, I was going to move around Christmas time because the landlady is so awful and I can't really persue her for the money for my car until I am out of here, but I wanted to be able to do it on my own schedule.
Now I have no idea what is happening with my relationship. No idea where bf is. No idea if he will call off the house buy. Not entirely sure how to fund a move. URGH.
Ok, rant over. I just needed to feel less alone in this. Thanks for reading, guys.
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