ArtFriend

I am just now going thru some of the boxes full of paper, letters, etc that my mom brought with her. I haven't had the ability to do so until now. I don't know why she had this, but it was a note I had written to my future self right before I entered college. So it is 40 years old! I was telling myself not to be afraid and to follow my heart. I had hoped that I would be a success in every way possible, but more importantly that I would be happy and a good person.

What happened to the dreams and aspirations of a 17 year old girl who was full of hope? It made me so sad to read this and know I have fallen so very short.

NestWasEmpty

I think - We get side tracked in our life's Dreams . We come to cross roads & have to choice which way to go . Some times you get Lucky enough to pick the right one . As I see it our life is a road map , if we try to take a short cut . We get lost .
We have to stop Re- Group , & find our way again . Takes longer , but if we work hard . We can find our way back , maybe not the lost time .
A Better way of life

janes ear

Nest, beautifully put. We all have second acts. Seize the day, my friend.

ScottFromWI

They are still right there inside you, the dreams and hopes. And you still have plenty of time to achieve a lot. People re-invent themselves at 60, 70, 80, it really doesn't matter when as long as you have the desire to do so.

I'd also caution against dredging up the past yet again AF - you know that you don't deal with it well sometimes and it's utterly unchangeable. Look at your letter as a reminder of who you are and what you can do...because you are still the same person you were then.

ArtFriend

I know you mean well Scott, but sometimes you come across very harsh. Yes, the past is unchangeable. But we are the total sum of our past experiences, so the past matters (as well as the present).

ArtFriend

Thank you for this!

ScottFromWI

My intent was not to be harsh at all. Did you read the other parts of my message too or just the part that you quoted? :-)

Berrybean

I think many of our hopes at 17 are fairly naive and idealistic. The things that still stand you can still work towards. You still have time. That is a gift that you have given yourself in recovery

2ndhandrose

I believe it was Dee that put this quote on another thread, "The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The second best time is today." (sorry if I butchered it!)

It's never too late to become what your 17 yr old self wanted to be. You haven't fallen short because you are not finished yet.

((ArtFriend))

Soberwolf

Art I read Scott's post the same i know he meant you can still do all those things

I was going to say the same things and about the past as it has been a massive trigger in the past

I was talking about college & uni with someone today might even be volunteering with a drug & alcohol worker

it sounded like a distant dream until it started becoming a reality

What can you do now is there anything you have wanted to do

FreeOwl

Proposed re-write:

"I am just now going thru some of the boxes full of paper, letters, etc that my mom brought with her. I'm so grateful to be able to do this now! I don't know why she had this, but it was a note I had written to my future self right before I entered college... So it is 40 years old! What a gift!!

In it, my Young Self is telling my Current Self not to be afraid, to follow my heart. In the note to Me, I am expressing hope that I will be a success in every way possible, but most importantly that I Be happy and a good person.

I am so encouraged and uplifted to be reminded of the dreams and aspirations of the 17 year old girl in me, who is so full of hope!!!

It moves me to tears of Joy to read this now, and to know I have her on my side and have the chance to embody her dreams and make her proud!!!"

bexxed

I was going through old stuff recently too and had a similar feeling.

Maybe think about who that 17 year old was. She wrote a letter to her future self. That, in and of itself, says something. Did she think that maybe her future self may struggle? Did she struggle? Maybe look beyond her words. Maybe that can help you to see that she perhaps was scared and uncertain.

Teenagers don't know or understand the enormity of a life. They don't know how times will change. It sounds like you've done good. Be kind to yourself, and kind to her. She is you, after all, and you are she. Perhaps it can help you to see how amazing you are.

I don't think that our struggles are wasted time.

doggonecarl

Maybe you should reply to the letter.

ArtFriend

Thanks everyone. I appreciate your perspectives very much.

Maybe I will do that Carl.

Dee74

My life hasn't turned out how I planned at 17 either AF...but really when I look at it, I couldn't have conceived this life at 17.

I wasn't a very mature 17 yo...I've grown on 30 years since then.

I've had bad times and good times, dreams lost and new dream won...

I've succeeded in some things and failed at others...

but I still want to wake up tomorrow

I think of myself sometimes as an antique - every scape every dent, every coat of paint or varnish - that's my journey to this point and to this day...

and today is pretty damn good

D

bigsombrero

Youth is truly wasted on the young, ain't it Art? No matter what age we are, we always look back and think "if only". You are not alone, I am still kicking myself for not taking advantage of some great opportunities in my younger years also!

But what can we do? I'd gander that giving your best effort today - no matter how old you are - is the best way to honor that 17 year-old girl and her letter. Treat yourself well, and be sober! You can do lots of things right now that your 17 year-old self would think is really groovy...

Eddiebuckle

Art, I cannot point to much that I have learned the first time around.

janes ear

I share art friend's assessment..

.Scott, you do come across quite harsh at times. I know you mean well, but hope you take this constructively. Kindness and helping word mean a great deal those suffering. You do a great deal for this community.

Wish you well, art friend.

Dee74

Really guys...we're all on the same side here.
this is not the place to critique someone else's posting style - and in this case totally unnecessary.

Send a PM if you must, but lets focus on the OP here.

Dee
Moderator
SR

Bellamiaa

Carl, I think that is a great idea!!