Pia

My AH always goes to one of his family members house almost everyday after work. I always thought it strange. I never understood it fully.He is there for hours and hours.

I found out that his family member hires prostites and sells drugs and is addicted to heroin!! I know he would never admit to it but I can't turn a blinds eye, now more and more make sense to me. I am so sick from learning this. I don't care if he is sick or it's a disease. I am besides myself I can't believe he is that messed up in the head.I have been through Heck and Back and gave and gave while he took and took.
I hope I never hear from him again. People sure like to talk when they find out someone is not together. Thank goodness for Mr Number app so I can block his texts and vm.

hopeful4

Ugh. I cannot even imagine how upsetting this has to be.

Many hugs to you. Keep using that app!

Pia

I am so glad I had a HIV test done last month. I feel like i'm in a movie watching this. Prostitutes a Heroin really!!

Pia

Now i'm overwhelmed. I checked my bank account that is joint and there is a withdrawal of almost $400.00. I use this bank to pay mortgage and have a my own account with him not on it

I don't know what to do. Did he do this so I could call him? I'm so disappointed.
I don't know if I should just figure something out. I don't want to hear any lies or justifications. I will move all the funds out tomorrow. I can't close the account because I need his signature. This day just keeps getting worse.

redatlanta

Look at the positive. You are HIV negative. He did not clear out the whole account.

Times like this gotta look at what's good rather than what is bad. HIV negative is a blessing my friend.

Praying

I'm so sorry! When my XAH dipped into drugs, it all went downhill very fast. I didn't know it was happening on the front end, but in hindsight it became very clear. Do your best to protect yourself as soon as you can. Sending you hugs and prayers.

FeelingGreat

Radiant, I'm so sorry he's done this to you and the money is just the icing on the cake. By all means get it out of the account asap.

I hate to mention it, but it might be worth checking with a clinic about other tests you could have, hepatitis, clamydia, and further down the line HPV. Don't neglect your pap test in the future will you?

Pia

I'm going to the bank as soon as they open tomorrow. I did a full work up this year and it came back negative.

Thank you everyone once again.

Florence

I hear you. It seems too crazy to be real life until it's your life. Do the next right thing, whatever that is. Time will reveal more about what he's been up to, and it will hurt, but you'll be gaining distance from him.

Pia

I thought about the positive before I went to sleep like you suggested and it helped me alot. thank you.

I am grateful he isn't here passed out on the couch
I am grateful I haven't been lied to for a week now
I am grateful I don't have to smell cigarette sime since i have asthma
I am grateful his stinky dirty body is not in my house
I am grateful no diseases.
I am grateful that I have funds in my other account to cover the loss and cough it up as an expensive lesson learned.

So many things to really be grateful for.

Pia

I love this quote I need to print it and put it in plain sight.

" Time will reveal more about what he's been up to, and it will hurt, but you'll be gaining distance from him."

I am better off now than the other times we separated. I am not obsessed with him anymore. I know now this marriage is over and I am ok with that. Some where through all the misery my heart and mind came in balance and they both agree it's over.

Refiner

I know what you mean about when you just KNOW when the marriage is over. It's like a gigantic weight being lifted off your shoulders. And this new awful information you're getting? Just shows you you're on the right path! I can't remember, but had you already started the paperwork for divorce proceedings? I hope you're at that bank right now getting what's left of the joint account moved to your own and be DONE with him! Do you have any credit cards jointly? I'd be getting your name off those immediately. If he's doing heroin, ANYthing is possible at this point.

Pia

I had started it before and then cancelled it. Got back together etc.
I got with the bank and that is taken care of.
Thankfully I we don't have any joint credit cards. I have most stuff separate. The house is in my name and vehicle.

hopeful4

I would go clear out the funds out of it and leave it at $0. Most banks will automatically close an account after a certain amount of time that it has a $0 balance.

Many hugs. Keep remembering those positives!!!