Ghosts31

Been over five weeks since I had an alcoholic beverage ... That seems like it has been the easy part.
For some reason I'm really struggling more about separation from girlfriend.
I understand why we need space from each other during this time and that the relationship had become toxic for both of us.
But in the last 10 days since we agreed to go no contact, we have talked or texted every day and hung out three of the last four days. In fact we haven't managed no contact at all.
hope of reconciliation was left open if I stayed sober and can get well... Which I know I need to do on my own and for myself and not her. But I admit she is inspiration and she has been supportive of my sobriety efforts more than anyone else. The seperation was so much easier to deal with before seeing her so often again though but I don't want to give her up either. It feels like a slippery slope. : /
And I can't help wanting to rush things back to normal (although I'm not sure what that is sober) ... I just feel anxiety period over her and the relationship the last few days because I feel so much hope and am not sure where things will go. I love her more than anything, but am at the same time wondering if I'm replacing one addiction with another ?
I guess the good thing is I have no desire to take a drink. ... Not sure if this is pertinent to anything but thank you for allowing me a place to vent .

Soberwolf

Give it time it was months of no contact with mrs sw i had to get to used to the hard days in early sobriety it was either getting through it or getting nowhere

The day came when mrs sw called and asked a series of questions and from there we took it slow

i remember her asking why are you doing this and who are you doing it for

Mrs sw was going al anon when i was still drinking and while i was going aa mrs sw was going al anon i found this out after and it made me cry

We celebrated 15 yrs together earlier this year and my advice is keep on keeping on

PurpleKnight

Hang in there, time is a great thing, concentrate on your Sobriety and the rest will follow!!

MythOfSisyphus

Hang in there! You have a lot on your plate. Maybe you'll have to focus on sobriety and try to accept that you will have to be patient with the rest.

Ghosts31

Thank you all ... Your words and advice mean a lot. I told her last night exactly how I am feeling and I am not ready and need to be by myself without the emotions involved right now.
Afterward I felt a sense of relief and the anxiety was gone ... Today I'm just feeling sad sns melancholic about the loss of my best friend.
Life goes on and I feel confident about growing and being stronger as a result of this ...