A Sunday night thought and then bedtime
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Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 4,251
A Sunday night thought and then bedtime
I am lying in bed after another sober day. I have been trying to take some time at night to reflect and be thankful for a day without alcohol.
Sometimes it is in the style of praying, speaking to someone- God?- whomever to say thanks for this sober day. Other times I just run over the benefits of not drinking or think about things I have read here.
Tonight I was reflecting on the fact that a large part of my struggle is that I just act immaturely and kind of bratty about the whole quitting thing. I feel sorry for myself that I can't drink like a non-alcoholic and feel resentful about having to stress over this and work so hard at it. I feel annoyed that I need to find time to go to AA and the addiction center as what I am doing up until now hasn't worked. I was trying to let that part of it go and accept I just need to be mature and make the right decision, every time when presented with a challenge. Just make that right decision every time, over and over.
This made me remember something that I read here once and I wanted to share it with you all again because it was such a great insight. I sure wish I remembered who said it so I could give credit, but it was almost a year ago and I wouldn't' know how to begin to search for it. If it was YOU, thank you.
This member said that those of us struggling should put as much effort into getting sober as we put into our drinking. They said "if they announced a free, open bar at the local AA meeting you sure as heck would find a way to make time and get there, wouldn't you?" This stuck with me. I certainly found time to "pop by the bar for a glass or two" I found time to work around hangovers, I made the effort to get to the store and load up on alcohol, etc. etc.
So my reflection tonight was on that. To stop all the whining and just get on with it. One right decision after another with as much effort put into recovery as I put into my drinking.
Night everyone. Keep it up!
Sometimes it is in the style of praying, speaking to someone- God?- whomever to say thanks for this sober day. Other times I just run over the benefits of not drinking or think about things I have read here.
Tonight I was reflecting on the fact that a large part of my struggle is that I just act immaturely and kind of bratty about the whole quitting thing. I feel sorry for myself that I can't drink like a non-alcoholic and feel resentful about having to stress over this and work so hard at it. I feel annoyed that I need to find time to go to AA and the addiction center as what I am doing up until now hasn't worked. I was trying to let that part of it go and accept I just need to be mature and make the right decision, every time when presented with a challenge. Just make that right decision every time, over and over.
This made me remember something that I read here once and I wanted to share it with you all again because it was such a great insight. I sure wish I remembered who said it so I could give credit, but it was almost a year ago and I wouldn't' know how to begin to search for it. If it was YOU, thank you.
This member said that those of us struggling should put as much effort into getting sober as we put into our drinking. They said "if they announced a free, open bar at the local AA meeting you sure as heck would find a way to make time and get there, wouldn't you?" This stuck with me. I certainly found time to "pop by the bar for a glass or two" I found time to work around hangovers, I made the effort to get to the store and load up on alcohol, etc. etc.
So my reflection tonight was on that. To stop all the whining and just get on with it. One right decision after another with as much effort put into recovery as I put into my drinking.
Night everyone. Keep it up!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
Great post Mera. I complained that I never had time for meetings. But I always had time for drinking. And I went through the whole "this just isn't effing fair that I can't drink" phase too so I really identified with what you said.
Still doesn't seem fair sometimes. But, I'm slowly learning to get over it. Hope you had a peaceful evening.
Still doesn't seem fair sometimes. But, I'm slowly learning to get over it. Hope you had a peaceful evening.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
Hi.
For me after trying for too long was to be honest with myself about MY drinking AND ACCEPTING I’m a person who cannot drink in safety. Sure after a lot of sober years I can drink but I can’t guarantee any good results from picking up that first drink.
For me just reading all the relapse posts here is a good remember when for me.
BE WELL
For me after trying for too long was to be honest with myself about MY drinking AND ACCEPTING I’m a person who cannot drink in safety. Sure after a lot of sober years I can drink but I can’t guarantee any good results from picking up that first drink.
For me just reading all the relapse posts here is a good remember when for me.
BE WELL
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