Sister3

My 18 year old sister had her baby on Tuesday; 6 weeks early. She is a very heavy IV heroin addict. The baby is 4 lbs and started withdrawals with hrs after birth. I was the only one she called, as I have been her mother figure for a very long time. Her caseworker (cps) called me and said the baby most likely will be taken away, and she may possibly go to jail...she also asked me if I was willing to adopt him; even if its just til they find a family. My heart breaks for him 💜 I have 3 kids, youngest is 9months. I can't adopt him, as sad as it sounds this is a HUGE lesson for my sister! But I have so much guilt for not adopting the baby....Im just already going through so much.

FeelingGreat

Sister I'm so sorry for this family trouble. I would feel guilty too, but sometimes we have to make the best decision despite how we feel, and that shows great strength.
There is a couple out there who really want a child, and who will welcome your nephew into their lives and love him to bits. This is the best outcome for him, and that's what you can focus on when you feel bad.
I hope that sometime in the future you can get to know him and be sure you did the right thing.

Sister3

Thank you. I am trying to be strong, he will be so loved...he's beautiful, and will be better off with someone other than my sister...

FeelingGreat

So much better......what sort of life would it be for him? He deserves a happy childhood in a stable home. It's sad for your sister though, but she made her choices, and he doesn't have a chance to choose.

PiperPene

There is definitely a couple out there yearning for a child who will give him a loving home where he is well taken care of. You should not feel guilty.
I hope he doing okay through his withdrawals. Jail may be the best place for your sister. It could be the beginning of her recovery.

stephendu

Yikes. I hope this has a happy ending.

Sister3

Today is the day we find out the outcome of my sisters consequences. The baby is doing fine, he's a fighter! They will be weaning him off the morphine the next few days to see how he does. He still has a feeding tube, he's tongue tied. I hope he is taken away from her as horrible as it sounds....i love both of them and I wish them both peace in their lives. I hope this is a huge wake up call for her!!!

Miserable56

Sister3,

My heart goes out to you! My daughter and her husband finally adopted a newborn baby boy after 8 years of being childless (they finally gave up fertility treatments and decided to adopt). Dexter is now 2.5 yrs old and the love of all our lives. There is some lucky couple out there who will love him to pieces. I pray every day for Dexter's birthmom, because without her, we wouldn't have him.

Sister3

Thank you 😊 my heart breaks for him, I'm scared he will be passed along from foster to foster....im praying for someone loving...he will need a healthy family. I grew up thinking it would have been better for my sisters and I too...💔

GardenMama

My sister adopted a baby after years of trying to get pregnant and I learned through that process that newborns are very easily adopted permanently and quickly, so try not to future-trip about foster care, okay? Take it easy on your heart, Sister3. You have done what you can, and if sometime in the future you hear that he needs you, I am sure you will be there as best as you are able. Take care!

MsPINKAcres

I truly believe what seems like pain & chaos, may very well be an absolute blessing.

This little fighter will be adored by adoptive parents & prayerfully your sister will have the chance to find her way to a better life for herself too.

Prayers for both of them!

Miserable56

3 Sisters,

Can your sister choose to adopt him out instead of him going to foster care? The reason I'm asking is that when my grandson was born, he was going to go into foster care as she (birthmom) had him and left asap (to go home to her other children). Shortly after, she came back to the hospital and decided to give him up for adoption instead of him going into foster care. That is when the hospital contacted the agency that my daughter and son in law were with and the rest is history. The birthmom got $3000 (which isn't much compared to how expensive it is to adopt).

Sister3

Update: Heard from her caseworker. I am disappointed 😞 they are letting her keep the baby, her and the father are moving in with his mother...all they are going to be doing is random popping in for safety and welfare. Cps has failed this little boy 😒 I hope my sister stays on the suboxone and goes to her parenting classes. Wt hell changed from last week??? Last week I was told baby is going to be taken away and she would be potentially going to jail...shocker!!!

MsPINKAcres

oh gracious - prayers for clarity for your sister, her BF & his mom for this precious little ones sake!

hopeful4

Babe...there are so many families out there, great parents, who are trying to adopt a child. Don't feel bad.

Your sister, and her baby, are facing the consequences of her poor choices. They are not your consequences, but you feel them too. My heart hurts for you.

Please take good care of yourself and know that by letting another family adopt that sweet baby you are giving the baby a whole new chance in life.

Many hugs to you.