Feeling empty and rejected
Ghosts31
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Chicago, illinois
Posts: 40
Feeling empty and rejected
Feeling sad, depressed and alone.
I Mutually ended things for good today with girlfriend of nearly two years, a woman I love and cherish more than anything on this earth and the one person I talk to every day, because my issues (depression and alcohol dependency) and her problems (major depression) don't mesh right now and the relationship has just become too unhealthy for both of us.
This is one more thing I've lost for good because of my addiction and it hurts more than everything else even more than giving up booze, which seems irrelevant right now because, while I know I need to do this for myself, her love also inspires me.
Been able to get through this 25th day with no beer or pot or food for that matter so far thanks in part to an awesome friend that lives 500 miles away texting back and forth. I admit I'm really struggling to do anything right now, which may be a good thing...I think I just need prayers.
I Mutually ended things for good today with girlfriend of nearly two years, a woman I love and cherish more than anything on this earth and the one person I talk to every day, because my issues (depression and alcohol dependency) and her problems (major depression) don't mesh right now and the relationship has just become too unhealthy for both of us.
This is one more thing I've lost for good because of my addiction and it hurts more than everything else even more than giving up booze, which seems irrelevant right now because, while I know I need to do this for myself, her love also inspires me.
Been able to get through this 25th day with no beer or pot or food for that matter so far thanks in part to an awesome friend that lives 500 miles away texting back and forth. I admit I'm really struggling to do anything right now, which may be a good thing...I think I just need prayers.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,526
I'm glad you posted about what you're going through, Ghosts. It does help to post and read here - it's a great distraction & we learn a lot. I'm sorry for your pain. Better days are coming.
Ghosts31
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Chicago, illinois
Posts: 40
Thank you for your support hevyn ... I loved your taglines. I am going to copy and paste them and use them for inspiration..
Writing and journaling and reading posts by others helps a lot. I found this site three days ago and am thankful I did. I need all the support I can get right now as do I'm sure many on this site. I know I have to reach deep within myself if I'm going to succeed and I know today and trying to go no contact is for the best in the long run while we both focus on ourselves ... But wow is it hard ...
Writing and journaling and reading posts by others helps a lot. I found this site three days ago and am thankful I did. I need all the support I can get right now as do I'm sure many on this site. I know I have to reach deep within myself if I'm going to succeed and I know today and trying to go no contact is for the best in the long run while we both focus on ourselves ... But wow is it hard ...
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,471
Ghost, I am so sorry that you are going through this heartbreak. Even though it is the best thing for both of you, I'm sure it is so painful. Do eat something, and take care of yourself this evening.
Ghosts31
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Chicago, illinois
Posts: 40
Thank you all for the kind words and support ...it means a lot. I did break down and lose my willpower and send her a picture of the gorgeous sunset tonight. And I also made it through another day with nothing to drink with alcohol in it ...only bottled water today.
My friend I was texting earlier has been in contact all night and I have been able to release a lot of my emotions and feelings to her.
Even though I've lost a lot in my life recently with no one to blame but me, I am thankful for those that have stood by me.
Right now, I'm just trying to look at tommorow as a new day.
My friend I was texting earlier has been in contact all night and I have been able to release a lot of my emotions and feelings to her.
Even though I've lost a lot in my life recently with no one to blame but me, I am thankful for those that have stood by me.
Right now, I'm just trying to look at tommorow as a new day.
Re-Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 7,909
Congrats on 25 days and counting, Ghosts31. Sorry you're in pain but glad you realize that the false relief of your drugs of choice (and, yes, alcohol is a drug) are not a real solution. If you need prayers, you've got mine today. Wishing you the best...
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