Coincidence?
A Day at a Time
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Grand Rapids MI
Posts: 6,435
Coincidence?
In 3 hours I'll celebrate 6 years sober. In 3 hours I'll mourn the one year anniversary of my daughter's death.
I don't believe in coincidences and I especially don't believe that my daughter's passing and my sobriety date being the same day are just random chance.
The big question is what was God, my daughter, the universe trying to tell me. For the last year I have pondered this question and I still really have no conclusions.
There are some very smart people here. Anyone have some ideas
I don't believe in coincidences and I especially don't believe that my daughter's passing and my sobriety date being the same day are just random chance.
The big question is what was God, my daughter, the universe trying to tell me. For the last year I have pondered this question and I still really have no conclusions.
There are some very smart people here. Anyone have some ideas
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,367
I have no idea what God might have been trying to tell you MIR.
As another flawed human being I think it's wonderful that a terribly sad date is tempered by also being the date of your life turning around.
If I was a loving Father, and it was possible? I'd probably try to organise something like that
Congrats to you on your sober date and on the inspiration you provide here MIR.
D
As another flawed human being I think it's wonderful that a terribly sad date is tempered by also being the date of your life turning around.
If I was a loving Father, and it was possible? I'd probably try to organise something like that
Congrats to you on your sober date and on the inspiration you provide here MIR.
D
aka Nesty
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Northern Vt.
Posts: 1,554
I never considered myself very smart or good with words or even understand a lot of things . I pondered your question for awhile . Wanted to say just the right thing .
Both Dates can be looked at in different ways . Your sobriety of 6 years is a Great thing to be happy about - Wonderful accomplishment. On the other hand the lost of your beloved daughter - Yes you should morn her loss , but you can celebrate the gift of having her for the time you did .
I wish you Peace in figuring out how to join them together Wish I could help you more , for I don't know your story .
Both Dates can be looked at in different ways . Your sobriety of 6 years is a Great thing to be happy about - Wonderful accomplishment. On the other hand the lost of your beloved daughter - Yes you should morn her loss , but you can celebrate the gift of having her for the time you did .
I wish you Peace in figuring out how to join them together
Wish I could help you more , for I don't know your story .
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Auckland
Posts: 2,548
This is such a beautiful question. I am going to be courageous like nestwasempty :-) I think the answer must be about love: loving ourselves by not drinking, loving others by not drinking, loving life by loving sobriety, loving God for life. It means so much. How beautiful.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 13,497
MIRecovery,
It seems like a gift to me, to remind you of how happy your daughter was that you found your sobriety. I can imagine that it meant more to her than she could ever say. Happiness in her heart,and probably her biggest wish for you.
hugs to you.
It seems like a gift to me, to remind you of how happy your daughter was that you found your sobriety. I can imagine that it meant more to her than she could ever say. Happiness in her heart,and probably her biggest wish for you.
hugs to you.
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2015
Posts: 444
Hi MIR
I posted a thread on regret before seeing yours.
From what I read you had five sober years with your daughter. There is hopefully some peace and satisfaction therein. You don't have to regret your sober time with her. It must have been the greatest gift to her.
My family is Jewish and for Jews there is meaning behind unknowable things. It is ascribed by generations that came before but meaningful in the present day.
Her loss for you would be beyond our knowing but we grieve with you. At the same time it would seem that the corresponding dates would serve as a chance for you to honor the time you had together, her life and your new one.
We light a 24 hour candle at each Jahrzeit (anniversary) of a loved one's passing.
It is symbolic and meaningless to many but for some it serves as a memorial to lives lived.... A time to reflect.
My prayers are with you tonight.
Jonathan
I posted a thread on regret before seeing yours.
From what I read you had five sober years with your daughter. There is hopefully some peace and satisfaction therein. You don't have to regret your sober time with her. It must have been the greatest gift to her.
My family is Jewish and for Jews there is meaning behind unknowable things. It is ascribed by generations that came before but meaningful in the present day.
Her loss for you would be beyond our knowing but we grieve with you. At the same time it would seem that the corresponding dates would serve as a chance for you to honor the time you had together, her life and your new one.
We light a 24 hour candle at each Jahrzeit (anniversary) of a loved one's passing.
It is symbolic and meaningless to many but for some it serves as a memorial to lives lived.... A time to reflect.
My prayers are with you tonight.
Jonathan
Pressure makes diamonds
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 521
You gave her 5 years of you being sober. If you hadn't had the courage to be sober before she passed you would have regretted it for your lifetime. It's symbolic in that on that day she lost her life , you were reborn. Congratulations on 6 years, that is amazing. I'm very sorry for your loss. I'm sure she is watching over you and very proud.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 1,424
I wonder if it's her way of saying to keep this sobriety date for the rest of your life because it is now forever connected with her. So in other words, stay sober! I am sorry for the sadness that today will bring still. But I hope you can allow yourself some time to be proud and celebrate your sobriety.
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