Almost funny
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Over the Rainbow
Posts: 24
Almost funny
Sick I know but here's the picture. AH stays drunk ALL WEEK last week. I finally catch a sober hour and ask him to sit down. As clearly as I can I tell him that I am leaving "no treats" just laying it out there. I don't have a clear date or details but it is what it is.
I wanted to ask him to repeat what I just said but I didn't no sense in rubbing salt into an open sore. The next afternoon when I come in from work he says we need to start doing things as a couple. WHAT? Yes he thinks it would be a great idea if we started walking together instead of me going to the gym, and we could take the dogs with us. FAMILY TIME......oh yeah now you want to be a family?
Week before that he was ready to go to church with me and did for the first time in 35 years. That didn't last very long for an hour after we get back from church he's at the liquor store buying booze.
Its sad.........but it is what it is! I'm DONE
Thanks again for listening
Donna
I wanted to ask him to repeat what I just said but I didn't no sense in rubbing salt into an open sore. The next afternoon when I come in from work he says we need to start doing things as a couple. WHAT? Yes he thinks it would be a great idea if we started walking together instead of me going to the gym, and we could take the dogs with us. FAMILY TIME......oh yeah now you want to be a family?
Week before that he was ready to go to church with me and did for the first time in 35 years. That didn't last very long for an hour after we get back from church he's at the liquor store buying booze.
Its sad.........but it is what it is! I'm DONE
Thanks again for listening
Donna
Member
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: sitting down and facing front
Posts: 170
My husband will decide at times we need to do things as a couple - but after he says that he expects me to come up with the ideas of what to do. This from a guy who spends the majority of his time drinking in the shed and watching telly
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
Oh boy do I remember this! I told my X for an entire year that I want a divorce. During sober conversation, serious talks. I told him before Xmas I was going to file. He begged me to wait. In March I kicked him out and filed. He acted like he just could not believe I would divorce him. Even now, a year and a half later, he still acts like he just cannot believe I would divorce him!
It's very frustrating...I get ya!
It's very frustrating...I get ya!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 2,792
Donna, all I recommend you to to is follow through with your threats. I threatened for so long, he laughed at me. But I did it. I filed, sold the house, bought a town home and divorced him after 34 years together. Bitter sweet!!
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 16,246
Somebodyswife.......he is up to his eyeballs in denial. They will often "promise" to do the things they feel like a woman wants to hear---"I'll go to church" "I will spend more time with the family (and dog). I will help m ore around the house. We can go to marriage counseling together."
They will do this when they want to get you off their back---but, don't want to face the idea of becoming sober.
You have to be willing to follow through.
I suggest that you go to the stickies at the top of the main page---above the threads.
Select the one called "Classic Readings". Then read the one: 10 ways to tell when an Addict or Alcoholic is full of crap.
That will give you an idea of where he is with his intention to deal with his addiction.
dandylion
They will do this when they want to get you off their back---but, don't want to face the idea of becoming sober.
You have to be willing to follow through.
I suggest that you go to the stickies at the top of the main page---above the threads.
Select the one called "Classic Readings". Then read the one: 10 ways to tell when an Addict or Alcoholic is full of crap.
That will give you an idea of where he is with his intention to deal with his addiction.
dandylion
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Texas
Posts: 2,872
My ex did all of the above-just lip service. Not one ounce of follow through. After we got separated almost a year ago - THAT is when he decided we should go away for a weekend together and take family pictures-really?? Freaking really? All I did was set up dates for us-set up the sitters, make the plans, reserve hotel rooms, etc-and most of the time I was met with rage from him so we didn't go. Then all of a sudden when he knows I'm seriously not ever letting him home or around his kids if he's been drinking THAT is when he decides to join the church, spend a week in rehab and be "cured", have family time, etc?!?! Seriously delusional. Too little too late. Damage was already done and he's only made it worse for himself. I pray for him but it's his life to live-man up or shut up!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 786
I get it! It's so odd it's almost funny. DS said something the other day about X (his dad) yelling at me on this horrible night a few years ago, and I snickered a little. He said, "it's not funny, Mom!!!!" I explained to him that, no, the whole situation is sad, and hurtful, and awful...but sometimes it was just so absurd you had to see the humor. X was being utterly ridiculous that night!
This sounds like it could be in a QUACKERS thread. If you haven't read those, I recommend them!
This sounds like it could be in a QUACKERS thread. If you haven't read those, I recommend them!
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