Housing Ladder???
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 13,497
Definition of property ladder in English: (or housing ladder)
noun
British
A series of ascending stages by which people are perceived to progress as they are able to buy more expensive houses, the initial stage consisting of buying one’s first property:
first-time buyers can’t afford to get on to the property ladder.
I rent, and probably always will.
noun
British
A series of ascending stages by which people are perceived to progress as they are able to buy more expensive houses, the initial stage consisting of buying one’s first property:
first-time buyers can’t afford to get on to the property ladder.
I rent, and probably always will.
Trudgin
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 6,348
Mortgage - "death grip" or "death pledge" .
More and more people in the states prefer renting and putting any extra money in retirement. This will become common place as the housing market continues to show marginal returns. The days of making a bunch of money on one's primary house may be dwindling and the tax benefits may not offset what alternative investments could gain.
Why are you concerned about it?? Do you have a place to live? If so, let us be thankful
I have had mortgages for over 25 years - still have a big one left. I would love to have all the interest I paid back and rented with it.
That's just me, but the dream is different today - at least in the states. Plenty of nice rentals all over at good prices, imo
More and more people in the states prefer renting and putting any extra money in retirement. This will become common place as the housing market continues to show marginal returns. The days of making a bunch of money on one's primary house may be dwindling and the tax benefits may not offset what alternative investments could gain.
Why are you concerned about it?? Do you have a place to live? If so, let us be thankful
I have had mortgages for over 25 years - still have a big one left. I would love to have all the interest I paid back and rented with it.
That's just me, but the dream is different today - at least in the states. Plenty of nice rentals all over at good prices, imo
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 6,666
Here we go...
I'l answer the question. Short answer- "I'm a human being god damn it, my life has value'.
Honest answer: I have been concerned about it for a very long time now. Like, actively since my teens (I was practically homeless throughout that time due to the stormy weather, and my parents were literally a hares whisker away from becoming homeless too i.e. the whole family at every step. I've been hearing about this sh!t since I was 10. Infact since moving back to this country 20 years ago we lived in 2 different houses, both of which belonged to other family members under strange agreements that I would have to peice together to relay (I was a kid remember). And I never wanted to live like them. The first one ended badly and split one side of the family, the second one now will end worse- my life and relationship with my child has been the first thing to go. My father and aunty have got a raw deal too so far- and we are the providers)
So naturally I have been concerned about it for a very long time now, actively since my teens. I figured from a young age, after being exposed to all that up to then that the only way I would ever live in peace would be to own my own home. I look around, I see things, I want to grow. I've been banking since a young age, like pre-teens (been working since then too, in factories and workshops and not just under my abusive father).
I was working in finance in my late teens and started actively putting their plan together. A mortgage, is what I obviously had in mind (my family are poor suffice to say). For a few years I was paying into a pension fund and building up my credit rating with credit cards and loans specifically for the reason. Well as luck would have it, I became clinically depressed then and eventually lost my job (with a good reference). The depression didn't subside, I was in bed at all times and eventually it progressed to PTSD which is what it was all along. Ran out of money when I was depressed, didn't claim a benefit or anything and I defaulted on all my loans. I defaulted on my life in fact. Car insurance ran out, thats been parked up since (it's F'd), liscence expired. I've been bouncing from one place to the next since, while parenting and trying to cure myself any which way possible. All on my own by the way, I never had any help from anyone in life only all of the opposite (besides the point).
Point is. The better part of a decade has passed since and I've been moving from one place to the next trying to keep this sinking ship afloat, to do the right thing, to be all things to all people at all times and it clearly isn't working out. I've had to move house +10 times in the middle of that. Girlfriend left me, I couldn't keep up the rent after a while so moved in with 'a mate' (who had followed me out to the area because he had nobody at the time, a drug dealer) he wanted to party all the time and I was clinically depressed so that wasn't working out. I moved in with more sensible mates, they only drank (?). The place was overcrowded and we had a baby there (me and gf) half the time so that wasn't working out. I came up with a solution and rented a place on my own nearby where it was me, gf and baby for 2 years most of the time, the reality was she wanted the best of both worlds as she was claiming a single parent payment at her mothers.
She got sorted with a luxury pad in a nearby town through her family and just upped sticks, stopped taking to me but landed the toddler to me every weekend while she went out partying (I had place set up like a kids dream tbf). Bad plumbing there so I bounced to another place in the same estate but had the same problem. Got an apartment across town then that I kept for 4 years but spent 3 of them fighting to keep it over my head (a payment entitlement) while fighting my ex in court (badly), become a total alco, and battling PTSD every moment of every day. I took an OD then, I couldn't take the stress anymore it was a cry for help. I never really got that help anyway. Got sent from the hospital back to my mothers to 'recover' but she stole all my money, gaslighted me for a year while I kept my cool then got a barring order against me when I started getting irate with her (I dunno how she has got through life, it really makes me question the point of being a decent person).
Thats just a sample. They say moving house is stressful right? Try doing it ten times with the aforementioned, like I said I took an OD because I could no longer handle it. I was renting for years too before I became clinically depressed but I didn't have kids then so it didn't matter as much (although I was still planning to own a home). I've not made any attempt to rent or anything since the OD, its futile. I lost belongings in all of them moves too, furniture, toys, bits and bobs- all good stuff because I dont buy crap. And its the same with my belongings now as is, they are in 3 different places. Some I don't know if I will ever get back and I have nowhere to put them anyway- things I worked and saved to buy all my life.
My audio equipment, my record collections, book collections, gym equipment, fishing gear, furniture, the kids toys, his ps3 games guitar hero all that, our sports equipment etc, etc, etc, even my clothes. my documents, work things, commendations, references, certificates. How can these even happen to a person? I dunno. So, all told. I have exited the situation inside out for 15 years while renting. I look at rent prices all over the country, even woke as an estate agent. The only thing that is going to work for me, and my kids is having some her stable to live, the one thing I have never had in my life which was the reason it became a priority from a relatively young age. I do be getting suicidal over this, have done for years. I've never had a steady place top live in my life ever, thats 25 years that I can remember. Now my eldest is nearly 10 and I have never had it so unstable. I'm just wracking my brains all the time (like, 10 years?) and I cannot find a solution...
Nobody has ever offered me advice in real life either and that is why I ask here. No, I don't have a place to live.
Why are you concerned about it?? Does that answer your question??
Honest answer: I have been concerned about it for a very long time now. Like, actively since my teens (I was practically homeless throughout that time due to the stormy weather, and my parents were literally a hares whisker away from becoming homeless too i.e. the whole family at every step. I've been hearing about this sh!t since I was 10. Infact since moving back to this country 20 years ago we lived in 2 different houses, both of which belonged to other family members under strange agreements that I would have to peice together to relay (I was a kid remember). And I never wanted to live like them. The first one ended badly and split one side of the family, the second one now will end worse- my life and relationship with my child has been the first thing to go. My father and aunty have got a raw deal too so far- and we are the providers)
So naturally I have been concerned about it for a very long time now, actively since my teens. I figured from a young age, after being exposed to all that up to then that the only way I would ever live in peace would be to own my own home. I look around, I see things, I want to grow. I've been banking since a young age, like pre-teens (been working since then too, in factories and workshops and not just under my abusive father).
I was working in finance in my late teens and started actively putting their plan together. A mortgage, is what I obviously had in mind (my family are poor suffice to say). For a few years I was paying into a pension fund and building up my credit rating with credit cards and loans specifically for the reason. Well as luck would have it, I became clinically depressed then and eventually lost my job (with a good reference). The depression didn't subside, I was in bed at all times and eventually it progressed to PTSD which is what it was all along. Ran out of money when I was depressed, didn't claim a benefit or anything and I defaulted on all my loans. I defaulted on my life in fact. Car insurance ran out, thats been parked up since (it's F'd), liscence expired. I've been bouncing from one place to the next since, while parenting and trying to cure myself any which way possible. All on my own by the way, I never had any help from anyone in life only all of the opposite (besides the point).
Point is. The better part of a decade has passed since and I've been moving from one place to the next trying to keep this sinking ship afloat, to do the right thing, to be all things to all people at all times and it clearly isn't working out. I've had to move house +10 times in the middle of that. Girlfriend left me, I couldn't keep up the rent after a while so moved in with 'a mate' (who had followed me out to the area because he had nobody at the time, a drug dealer) he wanted to party all the time and I was clinically depressed so that wasn't working out. I moved in with more sensible mates, they only drank (?). The place was overcrowded and we had a baby there (me and gf) half the time so that wasn't working out. I came up with a solution and rented a place on my own nearby where it was me, gf and baby for 2 years most of the time, the reality was she wanted the best of both worlds as she was claiming a single parent payment at her mothers.
She got sorted with a luxury pad in a nearby town through her family and just upped sticks, stopped taking to me but landed the toddler to me every weekend while she went out partying (I had place set up like a kids dream tbf). Bad plumbing there so I bounced to another place in the same estate but had the same problem. Got an apartment across town then that I kept for 4 years but spent 3 of them fighting to keep it over my head (a payment entitlement) while fighting my ex in court (badly), become a total alco, and battling PTSD every moment of every day. I took an OD then, I couldn't take the stress anymore it was a cry for help. I never really got that help anyway. Got sent from the hospital back to my mothers to 'recover' but she stole all my money, gaslighted me for a year while I kept my cool then got a barring order against me when I started getting irate with her (I dunno how she has got through life, it really makes me question the point of being a decent person).
Thats just a sample. They say moving house is stressful right? Try doing it ten times with the aforementioned, like I said I took an OD because I could no longer handle it. I was renting for years too before I became clinically depressed but I didn't have kids then so it didn't matter as much (although I was still planning to own a home). I've not made any attempt to rent or anything since the OD, its futile. I lost belongings in all of them moves too, furniture, toys, bits and bobs- all good stuff because I dont buy crap. And its the same with my belongings now as is, they are in 3 different places. Some I don't know if I will ever get back and I have nowhere to put them anyway- things I worked and saved to buy all my life.
My audio equipment, my record collections, book collections, gym equipment, fishing gear, furniture, the kids toys, his ps3 games guitar hero all that, our sports equipment etc, etc, etc, even my clothes. my documents, work things, commendations, references, certificates. How can these even happen to a person? I dunno. So, all told. I have exited the situation inside out for 15 years while renting. I look at rent prices all over the country, even woke as an estate agent. The only thing that is going to work for me, and my kids is having some her stable to live, the one thing I have never had in my life which was the reason it became a priority from a relatively young age. I do be getting suicidal over this, have done for years. I've never had a steady place top live in my life ever, thats 25 years that I can remember. Now my eldest is nearly 10 and I have never had it so unstable. I'm just wracking my brains all the time (like, 10 years?) and I cannot find a solution...
Nobody has ever offered me advice in real life either and that is why I ask here. No, I don't have a place to live.
Originally Posted by Flynbuy 
Why are you concerned about it??
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 6,666
28 years. 28 years of instability around my housing situations that I can remember, I forgot I have done nothing in the past 3 years of note. Spent 6 months in a hostel.
Spent a couple of months on a friends couch. Was in hospital, I was hoping to stay. The situation I am in now I can't bring kid's into which the court recognizes. Unreal.
Spent a couple of months on a friends couch. Was in hospital, I was hoping to stay. The situation I am in now I can't bring kid's into which the court recognizes. Unreal.
Hang on!
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: Ohio
Posts: 181
Originally Posted by Flynbuy
Mortgage - "death grip" or "death pledge" .
More and more people in the states prefer renting and putting any extra money in retirement. This will become common place as the housing market continues to show marginal returns. The days of making a bunch of money on one's primary house may be dwindling and the tax benefits may not offset what alternative investments could gain.
Why are you concerned about it?? Do you have a place to live? If so, let us be thankful
I have had mortgages for over 25 years - still have a big one left. I would love to have all the interest I paid back and rented with it.
That's just me, but the dream is different today - at least in the states. Plenty of nice rentals all over at good prices, imo
More and more people in the states prefer renting and putting any extra money in retirement. This will become common place as the housing market continues to show marginal returns. The days of making a bunch of money on one's primary house may be dwindling and the tax benefits may not offset what alternative investments could gain.
Why are you concerned about it?? Do you have a place to live? If so, let us be thankful
I have had mortgages for over 25 years - still have a big one left. I would love to have all the interest I paid back and rented with it.
That's just me, but the dream is different today - at least in the states. Plenty of nice rentals all over at good prices, imo
I never saw a house as anything but an expense, I have no delusions about the value of a used house. But my mortgage is mostly paid off and rents around here are more than my mortgage. Opportunity cost indeed.
Thank goodness people are waking up to housing being an expense not an investment. It is bringing sanity back to real estate in most markets.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 3,109
Strat it doesn't sound like you are ready to get a mortgage yet but I'm going to say again that I think setting short and long term goals and starting to work towards them in a systematic way is the way to go. How about going to get your licence reinstated? Getting a part time job? Looking to fix your credit rating? Renting a room just for yourself? Your son can come spend the night with you there. Then gradually over time as the smaller short term goals are reached you can start working on the longer term goals of getting a bigger place to live and saving money up.
That is how I got to where I am, granted I didn't face as much adversity as you have but I got myself good credit, I worked, I saved up my money and I bought a cheap fixer upper townhouse. I never thought I'd still be living in it 12 years later but my plan didn't work out the way I thought it would...... I ended up getting divorced and having to buy him out and pay for everything on my own so I took a hit there. Sometimes life throws us curve balls. I would love to sell my place and get a bigger one, we have seriously outgrown this one, but the reality is that I simply can't afford to. One day getting that bigger house is still my long term goal. Knocking my debt down is a short term goal..... I've got it down $4000 in the last two years. Trying to get a better paying job is another short term goal that I'm working towards.
Sit down and think about what you can do in the next say three months, one year, five years to better your situation and lay it out how to do them in order.
That is how I got to where I am, granted I didn't face as much adversity as you have but I got myself good credit, I worked, I saved up my money and I bought a cheap fixer upper townhouse. I never thought I'd still be living in it 12 years later but my plan didn't work out the way I thought it would...... I ended up getting divorced and having to buy him out and pay for everything on my own so I took a hit there. Sometimes life throws us curve balls. I would love to sell my place and get a bigger one, we have seriously outgrown this one, but the reality is that I simply can't afford to. One day getting that bigger house is still my long term goal. Knocking my debt down is a short term goal..... I've got it down $4000 in the last two years. Trying to get a better paying job is another short term goal that I'm working towards.
Sit down and think about what you can do in the next say three months, one year, five years to better your situation and lay it out how to do them in order.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
I keep telling my wife I want to sell the house and rent - much cheaper when you factor everything into it.
Now if I can find a small place down south that won't cost a lot. Live there in the winter and drive around in a motor home the rest of the time...
But first I must buy a lottery ticket...
Now if I can find a small place down south that won't cost a lot. Live there in the winter and drive around in a motor home the rest of the time...
But first I must buy a lottery ticket...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 6,666
Originally Posted by Della1968
Strat I think you really need to actively try to find a way to let go of the past if you are ever going to move forward.
Originally Posted by zenchaser
Strat it doesn't sound like you are ready to get a mortgage yet but I'm going to say again that I think setting short and long term goals and starting to work towards them in a systematic way is the way to go. How about going to get your licence reinstated? Getting a part time job? Looking to fix your credit rating? Renting a room just for yourself? Your son can come spend the night with you there. Then gradually over time as the smaller short term goals are reached you can start working on the longer term goals of getting a bigger place to live and saving money up.
Sit down and think about what you can do in the next say three months, one year, five years to better your situation and lay it out how to do them in order.
Sit down and think about what you can do in the next say three months, one year, five years to better your situation and lay it out how to do them in order.
I know I'm not going to get a mortgage, that was my point basically. Bad loans and credit. Did you read my big long post? That is just fricken terrible. I lost my career because of clinical depression and PTSD and thats what happened, I can't believe there are no support systems in place for everything that has happened to me. Society is sick and twisted.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 3,109
Buddy there is nothing you can do about what has already happened. All you can do is look forward and take care of what you can today.
I'm not trying to sound harsh but the only person who can change your prospects is you. I read your posts, you aren't the only person who has bad credit or an unfair childhood. I left home as a teenager too because I found my life there to be intolerable. You are an adult today and responsible for your own destiny. You have my sympathy and compassion, you've had a hard go of things and you've been treated unfairly and abused. No doubt. But how long are you going to let that hold you back from having the things you deserve in life?
I'm not trying to sound harsh but the only person who can change your prospects is you. I read your posts, you aren't the only person who has bad credit or an unfair childhood. I left home as a teenager too because I found my life there to be intolerable. You are an adult today and responsible for your own destiny. You have my sympathy and compassion, you've had a hard go of things and you've been treated unfairly and abused. No doubt. But how long are you going to let that hold you back from having the things you deserve in life?
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,826
I think the "housing ladder" is just one more of those milestones that society can make us feel like a failure over if we're not aspiring to be on it or have yet to reach the milestone by a certain age, the others are career path, marriage, kids etc.
Like all things in life we gotta live our own life and not feel we're falling short or feel like an underachiever if we're not hitting these milestones, or comparing ourselves to what others have, or at what stage in life other people are at compared to ourselves, because the reality is life happens in different ways or at different timeframes for each of us.
My sister lives in the South East of England and currently pays £1000 of rent a month with her husband, they are looking around for a house to buy at the moment but everything is £250k minimum, and the mortgage payments wouldn't be any cheaper than what they pay in rent, their theory is all that money is going to a landlord, but over the lifetime of a mortgage they'll pay close to 400k, you then have to factor in life insurance, buildings insurance, local council taxes, repairs/maintenance to the property, there's a theory emerging that renting can be a cheaper way forward in this day and age.
At the end of the day, you gotta do what's right for you Start, as long as you can be happy with your living situation, then that's the way forward!!
Like all things in life we gotta live our own life and not feel we're falling short or feel like an underachiever if we're not hitting these milestones, or comparing ourselves to what others have, or at what stage in life other people are at compared to ourselves, because the reality is life happens in different ways or at different timeframes for each of us.
My sister lives in the South East of England and currently pays £1000 of rent a month with her husband, they are looking around for a house to buy at the moment but everything is £250k minimum, and the mortgage payments wouldn't be any cheaper than what they pay in rent, their theory is all that money is going to a landlord, but over the lifetime of a mortgage they'll pay close to 400k, you then have to factor in life insurance, buildings insurance, local council taxes, repairs/maintenance to the property, there's a theory emerging that renting can be a cheaper way forward in this day and age.
At the end of the day, you gotta do what's right for you Start, as long as you can be happy with your living situation, then that's the way forward!!
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: US East Coast
Posts: 14,286
You might be surprised by how many people live with PTSD. I've had it for about 65 years. Did that make my life harder? You bet it did. But I never let it stop me. I had to settle for jobs that weren't as good as they could have been but that's water over the dam. I worked and saved. Sometimes we need to move on with our lives. Just my opinion.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Ireland
Posts: 78
Strat. I don't normally post advice as I an early in this journey. But I am also in Ireland and there are many areas you can get help if you want. There are free counselling services with the hse. You are entitled to see a psychiatrist free of charge. All you have to do is get a referral from your gp. Ok you may have to wait a few weeks but you would then be in the system and under their care.
That's the first thing. Secondly in thus country we are obsessed with owning houses. In a lot of European countries they simply rent and cannot understand the obsession with owning your own house. We do have a house as my husband is extremely careful with money. But it is most certainly not the be all and end all. I understand it is something you want from your childhood.
What really stands out to me is that you know what you need. Help. But I can't see where you are actively getting it. The help is there. I think visit gp. Ask for referral to psychiatrist. Make that the starting point to getting your life in order. Without a sound mind you will never get the other stuff. You deserve the help. Get it.
That's the first thing. Secondly in thus country we are obsessed with owning houses. In a lot of European countries they simply rent and cannot understand the obsession with owning your own house. We do have a house as my husband is extremely careful with money. But it is most certainly not the be all and end all. I understand it is something you want from your childhood.
What really stands out to me is that you know what you need. Help. But I can't see where you are actively getting it. The help is there. I think visit gp. Ask for referral to psychiatrist. Make that the starting point to getting your life in order. Without a sound mind you will never get the other stuff. You deserve the help. Get it.
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 5,937
I've read that Ireland is one of the most expensive real estate markets in the world. I dunno how anyone can buy a house there. The term "housing ladder" is new to me. All my life I've rented because I never knew where I'd wind up when I "grew up". But I think now I'm getting close to ready to try to buy a house a year or two down the road. If I do it will be just saving up enough for earnest money (like a down payment) and get a mortgage. My credit is okay- not stellar but pretty decent and should get better over the next couple years.
Your situation sucks and you've been dealt a bum hand but perhaps you should take Willow3's advice and see what assistance there is. Your country has a fair number of social programs and it sounds like you deserve a little help. Civilization exists because it's the best way we have to help each out and live better lives. Don't waste the resources humans have spent thousands of years building up!
Your situation sucks and you've been dealt a bum hand but perhaps you should take Willow3's advice and see what assistance there is. Your country has a fair number of social programs and it sounds like you deserve a little help. Civilization exists because it's the best way we have to help each out and live better lives. Don't waste the resources humans have spent thousands of years building up!
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