Charlie's Accountability Thread
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Join Date: Jan 2014
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Charlie's Accountability Thread
I figured I would start a daily thread to hold myself accountable to myself and to SR.
I finally revealed to my wife that I have a drinking problem. She already knew but I never admitted it till today. We spoke more about it this evening. She is proceeding cautiously as I told her many times that I was either cutting back or stopping (she never knew the extent of my drunkeness.)I can't blame her as she only has the past to go on. I've lied to her about my drinking for the past 14 years so I can't get angry that she doesn't believe me "this time". I told her "let my actions speak as actions don't lie". I told her to just be supportive and hold me accountable and with compassion if she could.
Well, day one is nearing a close. I know good and well that the "storm" (withdrawal / moodiness / temptation / sleeplessness/ doubts) is on its way so I am battening down the hatches and going back to my Boy Scout days of being prepared.
I finally revealed to my wife that I have a drinking problem. She already knew but I never admitted it till today. We spoke more about it this evening. She is proceeding cautiously as I told her many times that I was either cutting back or stopping (she never knew the extent of my drunkeness.)I can't blame her as she only has the past to go on. I've lied to her about my drinking for the past 14 years so I can't get angry that she doesn't believe me "this time". I told her "let my actions speak as actions don't lie". I told her to just be supportive and hold me accountable and with compassion if she could.
Well, day one is nearing a close. I know good and well that the "storm" (withdrawal / moodiness / temptation / sleeplessness/ doubts) is on its way so I am battening down the hatches and going back to my Boy Scout days of being prepared.
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Join Date: Jul 2014
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How are you feeling today Charlie? Have you spoken to your friends yet? Your last post about that really hit me. I have finally, finally found a real friend here in Italy- after 10 freaking years! I cannot tell you how much I missed having a girlfriend. Unfortunately she is an exact copy of me, including the drinking. I have a fear that if I am to be serious about this I'm going to have to take some time away from her. It is sad and difficult. I know you understand.
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Day 2 post:
Good day today. Work was busy. Had several texts today about meeting vendors after work to talk about upcoming projects. Which is code for drinking. I passed on both offers and came straight home. Its good to have my sobriety out in the open instead of hiding it.
Feeling pretty good physically too.
Thanks for all the support guys
Good day today. Work was busy. Had several texts today about meeting vendors after work to talk about upcoming projects. Which is code for drinking. I passed on both offers and came straight home. Its good to have my sobriety out in the open instead of hiding it.
Feeling pretty good physically too.
Thanks for all the support guys
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Join Date: Jan 2014
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Day 3 post.
Slept like a rock last night. Didnt want to get up. But i was sober. Had some training sessions today and they were interesting which is nice.
Not feeling quite like myself so i think. But who am i to know what normal feels like. Haha. Just feeling cloudy and unopinionated...just blah...i guess.
Got an invite to throw horse shoes after work today. Beer is always involved. I didnt even respond. I just drove straight home again.
Other than that I am hanging in there.
Thanks for listening / reading
Slept like a rock last night. Didnt want to get up. But i was sober. Had some training sessions today and they were interesting which is nice.
Not feeling quite like myself so i think. But who am i to know what normal feels like. Haha. Just feeling cloudy and unopinionated...just blah...i guess.
Got an invite to throw horse shoes after work today. Beer is always involved. I didnt even respond. I just drove straight home again.
Other than that I am hanging in there.
Thanks for listening / reading
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Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 585
Day 4 post:
To my surprise I slept really good last night. As well today at work I was very productive. Came home and started in on chores.
My wife and kids leave out of town for the weekend tomorrow for her fathers birthday. I am staying back as I have to go into the office tomorrow to play catch up. They will be gone till Monday. Yeah, I'm a little worried because at some point no matter how busy I stay I know the though will come to my mind.
Oh well I will deal with the future when it becomes the present.
Day 4 down and things are improving. Thanks for reading and thanks for the support guys.
To my surprise I slept really good last night. As well today at work I was very productive. Came home and started in on chores.
My wife and kids leave out of town for the weekend tomorrow for her fathers birthday. I am staying back as I have to go into the office tomorrow to play catch up. They will be gone till Monday. Yeah, I'm a little worried because at some point no matter how busy I stay I know the though will come to my mind.
Oh well I will deal with the future when it becomes the present.
Day 4 down and things are improving. Thanks for reading and thanks for the support guys.
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Day 6 post:
Missed my day 5 post due to being on the sober weekender thread.
Had a great day yesterday but didnt sleep well at all. It happens.
Gonna spend sometime with my mother today. Take care everyone
Missed my day 5 post due to being on the sober weekender thread.
Had a great day yesterday but didnt sleep well at all. It happens.
Gonna spend sometime with my mother today. Take care everyone
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Join Date: Jan 2014
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Day 7 post:
Pretty stressful day today, work related. The thought crept in my mind to go grab a few. But i headed home and cut the grass and weed eated.
Ive always read here that if your getting urge to drink. Get exercise. I didnt realize how true it is. Got some good exercise and the thought has past.
Day 7 is nearing a close. Thanks for all the continued support guys. Its greatly appreciated.
Pretty stressful day today, work related. The thought crept in my mind to go grab a few. But i headed home and cut the grass and weed eated.
Ive always read here that if your getting urge to drink. Get exercise. I didnt realize how true it is. Got some good exercise and the thought has past.
Day 7 is nearing a close. Thanks for all the continued support guys. Its greatly appreciated.
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Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: New England
Posts: 2,414
Hey Charlie! Hang in there with the rough time. Good going with the physical activity and lawn work. Today I trimmed a tree and am crossing my fingers that I did not significantly alter the course of its growth. I will have to google that later. Remember to drink a lot of water and stay hydrated. Have a good night!
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Day 8 post:
Good day today. Kids are at the grandparents. Went to dinner with my wife. She said i was acting funny. Yet im sober. My wife has only known me as "drunk" charlie. I wonder if me getting sober will cause issues with my wife. I havent known the real me for so long what if she doesnt know the real me. What if the real me isnt compatable with my wife? BTW she never drinks...never. have i opened up something i wasnt ready for?
Good day today. Kids are at the grandparents. Went to dinner with my wife. She said i was acting funny. Yet im sober. My wife has only known me as "drunk" charlie. I wonder if me getting sober will cause issues with my wife. I havent known the real me for so long what if she doesnt know the real me. What if the real me isnt compatable with my wife? BTW she never drinks...never. have i opened up something i wasnt ready for?
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