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Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Brisbane! Australia
Posts: 12
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Hi, I'm a 43 year old single lady and I have a big drinking problem. I drink at least a six pack of beer everyday, I usually drink about 8 drinks during the weekdays and 12-15 on the weekends. I have actually taken a day off work today (it's a Monday) simply because I got drunk yesterday (I had 14 beers and half a bottle of wine and im only 163cm tall) and I couldn't drag myself out of bed this morning.
I drink by myself. I drink because I'm bored and drinking makes my life boring. I feel like I have no willpower to stop. Drinking makes me unmotivated to do simple things like chores. My house is always a mess. All I seem to do is go to work and drink.
Last month I was caught drink driving. I knew it was going to happen because I drank and drove all the time, it was just a matter of time. Although it was the most embarrassing thing that has happened to me in my life, it was also a relief because then I told my family that I had a drinking problem. I actually went cold turkey for a couple of weeks. I got my liver checked, luckily it's still ok (phew!). The first week was a nightmare and I was an emotional wreck and cried a Lot. But the second week I actually started to feel good, I had lost a little weight, had money left in my wallet, and I actually felt like my brain was getting a bit smarter (I know that sounds silly).
I know I have to stop drinking for the rest of my life but I feel like I don't have the willpower to do it. I'm here for some support as my family know I have a problem but they don't seem to want to talk about it (I don't think they know what to say). I need help and advice
I drink by myself. I drink because I'm bored and drinking makes my life boring. I feel like I have no willpower to stop. Drinking makes me unmotivated to do simple things like chores. My house is always a mess. All I seem to do is go to work and drink.
Last month I was caught drink driving. I knew it was going to happen because I drank and drove all the time, it was just a matter of time. Although it was the most embarrassing thing that has happened to me in my life, it was also a relief because then I told my family that I had a drinking problem. I actually went cold turkey for a couple of weeks. I got my liver checked, luckily it's still ok (phew!). The first week was a nightmare and I was an emotional wreck and cried a Lot. But the second week I actually started to feel good, I had lost a little weight, had money left in my wallet, and I actually felt like my brain was getting a bit smarter (I know that sounds silly).
I know I have to stop drinking for the rest of my life but I feel like I don't have the willpower to do it. I'm here for some support as my family know I have a problem but they don't seem to want to talk about it (I don't think they know what to say). I need help and advice
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 3,293
Yeah Piggin, that's pretty heavy drinking. I know what it's like having to take Monday off from work because of drinking a lot over the weekend. For me, I eventually started taking a lot of Monday's off, and the occasional Tuesday. I also did the same thing; work, drink, work, drink etc. It just became a habit. A pretty messed up way to live. I also understand the situation you have with your family. They probably need some time to process what you said. My guess is they probably already know you have a drinking problem, but now need to deal with it now that it's in the open.
My advice would be this. First, get support. SR is enough for some but for me, I also needed f2f support, so I go to AA meetings. I really don't do much there, but just being around other people like me helps a lot. Might consider a CD therapist or a group therapy situation. Many more options. Second, stay real busy. Make a plan for each day and stick with it. Find something else to do during your drinking times. Stay active. For me, this was crucial. I also look at the rest of my life thing in 24 hour segments. Reaching a goal has to start with today.....then tomorrow......then the next day.
I also keep something sweet around my house. It can help a lot.
I could go on, but I think I've already posted too much. Others will come along with other ideas. Most important, give yourself a big hug each day that you stay sober. Each day is a small miracle. Have a great and sober evening. John
My advice would be this. First, get support. SR is enough for some but for me, I also needed f2f support, so I go to AA meetings. I really don't do much there, but just being around other people like me helps a lot. Might consider a CD therapist or a group therapy situation. Many more options. Second, stay real busy. Make a plan for each day and stick with it. Find something else to do during your drinking times. Stay active. For me, this was crucial. I also look at the rest of my life thing in 24 hour segments. Reaching a goal has to start with today.....then tomorrow......then the next day.
I also keep something sweet around my house. It can help a lot.
I could go on, but I think I've already posted too much. Others will come along with other ideas. Most important, give yourself a big hug each day that you stay sober. Each day is a small miracle. Have a great and sober evening. John
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Hi - another 43 year old lady here.
You're right about your family not knowing what to say. To be fair, they just don't understand it. This is a great place to get support; advice; and ideas. I have also found AA an amazing fellowship - I looked around the meeting last night and remembered a time when I had a deep distrust of all people, but especially women. I have met some lovely ladies in the rooms (mothers; grandmothers; teachers; surgeons; nurses; shop assistants; 'escorts'). I hear of DUIs quite often and for many that was their rock bottom. One who spoke recently - a visitor from another city - said her rock bottom was being arrested for attempted murder, which she couldn't remember at all, but knew her anger raged out of control when drinking so thinks it's entirely possible. How terrible to live with that.
Some of the ladies at my home group are becoming close friends. For the first time in my adult life I feel comfortable around other women.
Alcohol is sneaky and powerful, and if we isolate ourselves, it is 3/4 of the way to winning the battle. There is strength to be found in numbers; companionship and understanding. I was so pensive about going to my first meeting, and I cried most of the way through it. It was like 'coming home' though. And it is in the AA rooms and working the 12 steps that I started to understand why I drink. And why I do a lot of other things. This understanding has enabled me to make changes. Like a mechanic trying to fix an engine - we need to understand why things aren't working so we can sort things out. We don't have to be alone through this.
Two books which really helped me in early sobriety were Monkey on my Shoulder (available from Amazon), and Living Sober (available in print from Amazon or any AA meeting, or free to download here Alcoholics Anonymous : Living Sober).
Good luck.x
You're right about your family not knowing what to say. To be fair, they just don't understand it. This is a great place to get support; advice; and ideas. I have also found AA an amazing fellowship - I looked around the meeting last night and remembered a time when I had a deep distrust of all people, but especially women. I have met some lovely ladies in the rooms (mothers; grandmothers; teachers; surgeons; nurses; shop assistants; 'escorts'). I hear of DUIs quite often and for many that was their rock bottom. One who spoke recently - a visitor from another city - said her rock bottom was being arrested for attempted murder, which she couldn't remember at all, but knew her anger raged out of control when drinking so thinks it's entirely possible. How terrible to live with that.
Some of the ladies at my home group are becoming close friends. For the first time in my adult life I feel comfortable around other women.
Alcohol is sneaky and powerful, and if we isolate ourselves, it is 3/4 of the way to winning the battle. There is strength to be found in numbers; companionship and understanding. I was so pensive about going to my first meeting, and I cried most of the way through it. It was like 'coming home' though. And it is in the AA rooms and working the 12 steps that I started to understand why I drink. And why I do a lot of other things. This understanding has enabled me to make changes. Like a mechanic trying to fix an engine - we need to understand why things aren't working so we can sort things out. We don't have to be alone through this.
Two books which really helped me in early sobriety were Monkey on my Shoulder (available from Amazon), and Living Sober (available in print from Amazon or any AA meeting, or free to download here Alcoholics Anonymous : Living Sober).
Good luck.x
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Brisbane! Australia
Posts: 12
I logged on for the first time since this post last year. I've only just read the comments above and thankyou both.
Ive just re-read what I wrote in July last year and 7 months later things still haven't changed with me. In fact they are worse. I only ever do housework if I absolutely Have to (and in fact employed a housekeeper late last year for a few motnhs before my house was a pigsty).
I've lost a dear friend since due to alcohol and not being able to understand and control my emotions.
I'm unhappy in ever aspect of my life whereas before (last july) I was still getting out in the sun on my days off. Now I just spend them in front of the tv drinking even more beer and wine than before :-(
It's definitely time for a change and I'll be logging on here daily, and probably most of the weekend! The weekend is going to be damn hard.
Ive just re-read what I wrote in July last year and 7 months later things still haven't changed with me. In fact they are worse. I only ever do housework if I absolutely Have to (and in fact employed a housekeeper late last year for a few motnhs before my house was a pigsty).
I've lost a dear friend since due to alcohol and not being able to understand and control my emotions.
I'm unhappy in ever aspect of my life whereas before (last july) I was still getting out in the sun on my days off. Now I just spend them in front of the tv drinking even more beer and wine than before :-(
It's definitely time for a change and I'll be logging on here daily, and probably most of the weekend! The weekend is going to be damn hard.
Do your best
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
We'll be here right with you Piggin
here are some links that are useful & will come in handy
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ful-links.html
here are some links that are useful & will come in handy
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ful-links.html
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 14,921
Welcome back.
So what's your plan to get sober?
I doubt that staying in your house alone, trying to "white knuckle" it, is going to work. You might survive a few miserable days, but it will be hard to make it a month.
This website is great, but I needed more than that. I finally gave up and went to AA. The combination of AA and this website has made the difference for me. I now measure my sobriety in years, not days.
So what's your plan to get sober?
I doubt that staying in your house alone, trying to "white knuckle" it, is going to work. You might survive a few miserable days, but it will be hard to make it a month.
This website is great, but I needed more than that. I finally gave up and went to AA. The combination of AA and this website has made the difference for me. I now measure my sobriety in years, not days.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 617
Originally Posted by Piggin 
Hi, I'm a 43 year old single lady and I have a big drinking problem. I drink at least a six pack of beer everyday, I usually drink about 8 drinks during the weekdays and 12-15 on the weekends. I have actually taken a day off work today (it's a Monday) simply because I got drunk yesterday (I had 14 beers and half a bottle of wine and im only 163cm tall) and I couldn't drag myself out of bed this morning.
I drink by myself. I drink because I'm bored and drinking makes my life boring. I feel like I have no willpower to stop. Drinking makes me unmotivated to do simple things like chores. My house is always a mess. All I seem to do is go to work and drink.
Last month I was caught drink driving. I knew it was going to happen because I drank and drove all the time, it was just a matter of time. Although it was the most embarrassing thing that has happened to me in my life, it was also a relief because then I told my family that I had a drinking problem. I actually went cold turkey for a couple of weeks. I got my liver checked, luckily it's still ok (phew!). The first week was a nightmare and I was an emotional wreck and cried a Lot. But the second week I actually started to feel good, I had lost a little weight, had money left in my wallet, and I actually felt like my brain was getting a bit smarter (I know that sounds silly).
I know I have to stop drinking for the rest of my life but I feel like I don't have the willpower to do it. I'm here for some support as my family know I have a problem but they don't seem to want to talk about it (I don't think they know what to say). I need help and advice
I drink by myself. I drink because I'm bored and drinking makes my life boring. I feel like I have no willpower to stop. Drinking makes me unmotivated to do simple things like chores. My house is always a mess. All I seem to do is go to work and drink.
Last month I was caught drink driving. I knew it was going to happen because I drank and drove all the time, it was just a matter of time. Although it was the most embarrassing thing that has happened to me in my life, it was also a relief because then I told my family that I had a drinking problem. I actually went cold turkey for a couple of weeks. I got my liver checked, luckily it's still ok (phew!). The first week was a nightmare and I was an emotional wreck and cried a Lot. But the second week I actually started to feel good, I had lost a little weight, had money left in my wallet, and I actually felt like my brain was getting a bit smarter (I know that sounds silly).
I know I have to stop drinking for the rest of my life but I feel like I don't have the willpower to do it. I'm here for some support as my family know I have a problem but they don't seem to want to talk about it (I don't think they know what to say). I need help and advice
We are here for you!
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,777
Originally Posted by Piggin
What do you mean February class 360?
It's the thread for people getting clean and sober this month.
Come March, it will move to the Daily Support forum. It's a great way to get and give support. 
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