Free time in sobriety
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Join Date: Apr 2015
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Free time in sobriety
What to do with "free time" might be a good topic for people who are new to practising a sober lifestyle.
By free time, in my case I mean time off work with no other obligations or things that need to be done. I'm a single guy with no children or other dependents (except for my cat), so I'm hoping that people with more obligations might also comment from their perspectives.
I used to think of free time as a time to relax and do nothing.
Now I still see it as an opportunity to relax, but also an opportunity to do a few things that I am interested in, accomplish a few little things, and really enjoy things that I can now appreciate with my clear, sober attention.
I remember how time seemed to stretch out when I first started living sober, especially on the weekends. And I also knew from a brief time in rehab some years ago that it would be a good idea to make plans for that "free time" to fill it with other activities, e.g., to have a to-do list for home or to have some little goals in mind.
Now I don't make strict plans according to a timetable, but I do sometimes jot down little to-do lists at home.
Also I have somehow developed the habit of thinking "what needs to be done?" and "what could I do today?" but it's freeform rather than driven by some internal taskmaster, and I do rest and veg out when I need to.
So if you worry that living sober will leave you with a huge void of extra clear-headed time on evenings and weekends that you won't know how to fill, I would suggest living one day at a time and trying to view that time (let's call it Bonus Hours!) as an opportunity: to rest, relax, eat well, exercise, regain one's health, accomplish a few things, and enjoy life!
Hoping that helps, and wishing all of you good health and happiness as you develop and practice your own ways to live a sober life.
By free time, in my case I mean time off work with no other obligations or things that need to be done. I'm a single guy with no children or other dependents (except for my cat), so I'm hoping that people with more obligations might also comment from their perspectives.
I used to think of free time as a time to relax and do nothing.
Now I still see it as an opportunity to relax, but also an opportunity to do a few things that I am interested in, accomplish a few little things, and really enjoy things that I can now appreciate with my clear, sober attention.
I remember how time seemed to stretch out when I first started living sober, especially on the weekends. And I also knew from a brief time in rehab some years ago that it would be a good idea to make plans for that "free time" to fill it with other activities, e.g., to have a to-do list for home or to have some little goals in mind.
Now I don't make strict plans according to a timetable, but I do sometimes jot down little to-do lists at home.
Also I have somehow developed the habit of thinking "what needs to be done?" and "what could I do today?" but it's freeform rather than driven by some internal taskmaster, and I do rest and veg out when I need to.
So if you worry that living sober will leave you with a huge void of extra clear-headed time on evenings and weekends that you won't know how to fill, I would suggest living one day at a time and trying to view that time (let's call it Bonus Hours!) as an opportunity: to rest, relax, eat well, exercise, regain one's health, accomplish a few things, and enjoy life!
Hoping that helps, and wishing all of you good health and happiness as you develop and practice your own ways to live a sober life.
So true. Although I lived through the hours of my drinking it still came as an enormous shock to me at how many hours there were. Like you Solarion I live on my own and my children are grown up and living their own lives so I didn't have loads of family commitments.
I think one of the best things is to do all those things that you are SUPPOSED to do anyway like shopping for actual food as opposed to ready meals and take aways and keeping up to date with all those chores that are missed
In addition there is contacting friends and family that you only ever did "when you had to".
Finally I think it is just great to have time to reacquaint yourselves with things your were interstellar in before drink or drugs took over everything.
I think one of the best things is to do all those things that you are SUPPOSED to do anyway like shopping for actual food as opposed to ready meals and take aways and keeping up to date with all those chores that are missed
In addition there is contacting friends and family that you only ever did "when you had to".
Finally I think it is just great to have time to reacquaint yourselves with things your were interstellar in before drink or drugs took over everything.
Great post, Solarion!
When I sobered up the first time, one of the things that was suggested to me was "time blocking". I learned to plan my days and evenings out so that I didn't find myself with empty time on my hands that may end up being filled by unplanned drinking.
Thanks for reminding me about this valuable tool!
When I sobered up the first time, one of the things that was suggested to me was "time blocking". I learned to plan my days and evenings out so that I didn't find myself with empty time on my hands that may end up being filled by unplanned drinking.
Thanks for reminding me about this valuable tool!
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Join Date: Apr 2015
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Today I did a load of laundry, read a few small chapters of "Teachings of the Buddha", changed the bed sheets, trimmed my hair, wrote out a to-do list on the back of an envelope so I could sort out all the little things buzzing around in my head (either ADHD or scattered/diverse interests), played with graphics and music software for a little while, made one move each on four games in progress on a slow-mo chess site (and won a game today!).
This is aside from feeding the cat and myself, a shower, a couple of brief naps, and SR time.
A pretty full day, now that I have written it all down! I think I need another nap now.
This is aside from feeding the cat and myself, a shower, a couple of brief naps, and SR time.
A pretty full day, now that I have written it all down! I think I need another nap now.
great thread! when i first got sober it seemed my free time was endless and i found it hard to fill.
now there isn't enough free time for all the cool things i fill my sober days with!
go figure.....
(today - meditation, some housework, SR, reading, trip to lake to bird watch, job search, phone visit with dear friend, important convo with son, watched a movie and now waiting for my beautiful gd to come and entertain me!)
now there isn't enough free time for all the cool things i fill my sober days with!
go figure.....
(today - meditation, some housework, SR, reading, trip to lake to bird watch, job search, phone visit with dear friend, important convo with son, watched a movie and now waiting for my beautiful gd to come and entertain me!)
I joined a meetup group and I just might go to my first meeting this week!
Was looking for a women for sobriety group but couldn't find one around here, but found a friends of science and reason. Meetup.com has lots of cool local groups. I've also been reading more, have been cleaning and organizing the house which really needs it after years of neglect when drinking. I've also had more time off work though. Been spending more time with the cats and Amazon shopping lol.
Was looking for a women for sobriety group but couldn't find one around here, but found a friends of science and reason. Meetup.com has lots of cool local groups. I've also been reading more, have been cleaning and organizing the house which really needs it after years of neglect when drinking. I've also had more time off work though. Been spending more time with the cats and Amazon shopping lol.
I've been spending a lot more time with family, reading, and cleaning/organizing. Today I went for a jog, worked on a presentation I have next week, did a little shopping, and spent some time chatting with my MIL. I'm finding there is so much I want to do and not enough time hard to imagine I spent most of my free time drinking or hung over.
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